Rising Sun
by Fortar
Summary: We all know Breaking Dawn from both Bella and Jacobs point of view, but ever wonder what is going through Edward's mind during this time?
1. Prologue

Rising Sun

Prologue

_Because I could not stop for Death_

_He kindly stopped for me_

_The Carriage held but just Ourselves _

_And Immortality._

_-_ Emily Dickenson

I never thought of death much, my kind vary rarely venture that path; it wasn't open to us. We were dead, undead and deathless. To us death was something that we watch from afar but never participated.

So it seems kind of ironic that in the last two years I had my share of near dearth experiences. All of them involving a small frail human girl that somehow became my life's blood – no pun attended.

Call it density, a curse or our luck. But it is what it is.

The frail human that was my life had been marked for death time and time again, and each time I had somehow pulled her from His lustful claws.

I sometimes wonder if being with her was the reason behind death desire.

She screamed and than was silent as I bent over her.

Our density was for me to end her life. Alice had seen it, before I could even fathom her more than a human. She had seen my eyes red with her blood; her body broken, and the monster fully satisfied. I had thought I had avoided that picture with James.

I had been able to control my more instincts side throughout this relationship – but what I really done was seduced her to follow me. It had started the first day in biology lab where I had constipated a thousands of ways to lead her away from the children so that I could feast in her blood – enjoying the warm sweat liquid of her life giving force. She followed me, like a child being lead away by the pip piper. She had allowed my lips to press against her throat – welcomed and yarned for them.

Little by little I had led her away from the humans that fought to protect her towards the darkness. It was not be my car where the final act was going to take place, or the meadow that once held the innocent reminders of love first kiss, but my house, my room. But the end was just the same. I had seduced my pray and she had come willingly.

I pressed my lips on her throat, inhaling the scent that had been both my salvation and my damnation. Flecking my teeth I ripped into the flesh, feeling for the first time the blood that had call me. Last time it had been laced with James's venom. Not any more – it was clean, fresh and pure. Mine to enjoy.

But I couldn't enjoy it. For what I had done was the final act in my long abusing of her. Will this act be the final thing that she couldn't forgive me? Would she finally see the monster that I was?

I pulled back allowing my tongue to lap over the womb as I had done throughout her body. I looked at her body – broken and bloody. Will she be able to forgive the monster I was?

My eyes closed, I lean my head on her throat. "Bella, Father forgive me."


	2. Chapter 1 Cars

Rising Sun

Chapter 1 – Cars

_Tiger, tiger, burning bright _

_In the forests of the night, _

_What immortal hand or eye _

_Dare frame thy fearful symmetry_

- William Blake

I had not known much peace during my existence; peace didn't come to those who didn't sleep. But in the early morning light even I could believe that I was able to sleep and in that have that peace. I could close my lids and deeply breathe in and pretend in my mind eyes that I was dreaming.

I would be dreaming of her of course. And in my dreams I was no long a vampire but a regular boy who could love this girl. I could touch her without the fear of breaking her and make love to her without the fear of killing her. I could bury myself in her body and never emerge.

Reality was not a dream. I couldn't do these things. It was no use to dream of things that cannot be.

But in the small light of morning I could believe I was a human, especially with her curled up against me. She was dreaming, her mind silent as ever. In times like this I was almost thankful for her mind's donjon. It allowed me to have the first tranquility away from others mind and their busy thought. As much as it frustrated to not hear her (the only mind that I would want to hear) I also love the serenity that she gave me.

My angle.

I held her close and brushed my lips across her forehead, feeling the electricity run through me. Would I never sis to feel it?

A vibration under the pillow stopped my thoughts, as I reached for it. Her hand moved, lying on my arm as if to tell me to ignore it. And I would love to, but I was waiting for something to be delivered. I have been waiting this arrival, since she agreed to allow me to replace her truck once it officially died and gone to car heaven. Thank God that it finally wheezed its last exhausted fumes couple of days afterwards.

I looked at the fingers as they lay gentle on my skin, the one caring the ring. I smiled, in a couple of weeks she would be mind by law and God. The first thing right I have done in a century of wrongs.

It was the one condition that I could live with if I was going to be the one who was going to change her. The marriage was important to me mostly because I was old fashion. I had watched in horror as the sexual revolution had come and gone, and was glad for the first time I wasn't human. Call it my Edwardian up bring but to me sex was more than an act between two people – it was an undying commandment between those people.

And even though Bella saw herself committed to me forever, the marriage would be my justification in doing the one thing I wanted in the whole world and the one thing I despised. She thought I was against changing her because I would lose the novelty of her human form, but the truth is I hunger for her to become like me. It was I love her to much for my self desires to control me.

She would join me.

But to always have her by my side, never to lose her to death, to be able to touch her without restrains, to finally kiss her wholly without a thought of being gentle was the most selfish thing I will ever do.

But I had agreed to the terms.

My family had just dropped Bella off at her home after the whole Italy incident; Carlisle had pulled me into the woods for a little man to man chat.

Actually for the first time since he has changed me, he yelled at me. I somehow found the end of his endless patience.

"_Do you realize what the hell you just did, Edward!? That for the last couple of months I had to put up with Esme, Jasper, Alice and Emmett mopping. Of you deciding to disappear without even telling anyone, Esme worrying, and the only way I knew what you were up to was Alice. How could you do this? Edward what the hell, were you thinking. You know these rules better than anyone else – you know that her knowledge of our world is punishable by death. What do you think would have happened if it was for the friendship between Aros and me? I will tell you – they would have hunted her, her family and us down and killed us. Her for knowing and for us allowing her to know."_

_"I didn't think"_

_"I am starting to realize that. Edward you have to start to take some responsibility for.."_

_"I have been trying to…"_

_"No you haven't, you ran away. And thank god she loves you in all your foolishness because she was willing to put herself and the people around her in mortal danger to rescue you,"_

_"I can't change her Carlisle I can't live with myself if I did, knowing I was the one who took the life."_

_"Edward, love isn't a smooth thing, look at Esme and I, or Rosaline and Emmett or Jasper and Alice, none of us had it easy. It scarier but you have to stop this running away or one day you are going to turn around and realize that she isn't chasing you. And you only have a year to turn her."_

_"Huh…"_

_"Find a term you can live with or so help me I will be the one turning her. Not that I think that she would be too apposed."_

I found the phone under her pillow and opened it. Jasper had text me that the thing I was waiting on was here. I smiled – another thing I was able to seduce her into.

As much as I hated leaving her, knowing I still had a couple of hours before Charlie woke up. I was excited about the gift.

I untwisted from her, hating the coldness that was coming between us. Finding my shirt on her floor, I picked it up and put on. I turned back to the bed to be meet by a set of beautiful brown eyes.

"Did I wake you," I said leaning down to smooth a curl from her face so I could see all of her face. She smiled and for the existence of me I would never get over the feeling of her smile.

"I was having a good dream," she whispered. Her eyes fluttering open and closed.

"What was it about," not waiting to give a moment up of this time. Jasper could wait – he would understand. He had been late to meetings before because of Alice.

"You and me, in our meadow," she whispered and even in her sleepiness her cheeks flared with color. I could only guess where the dream was leading. I smiled and made a mental note that when she was less breakable, to take her to our meadow. What she didn't know was that I had purchased that meadow for her as a first anniversary present. I was getting a head of myself but I wanted her to always remember that place. And I wanted it to stay as pristine as the first day I brought her there. I had seen progress move forward, swallowing up all in its path, our meadow was going to stay the same for eternity, just like her and I.

I brushed my hands across her face allowing the contexture of her skin to imprint in my memory. "Go back to sleep, love. Dawns light hasn't break yet and you need your sleep. I will be back in the morning to pick you up."

I leaned forward and kissed her on her lips. She moved hers with mine sluggishly, still sleeping. She closed her eyes and settled into the sleep, a smile on her lips.

I walked to her desk and took out a sheet of paper. This was a little tradition that I had started after I came home from Italy, leaving her little notes when I left her in the morning.

Dream of me as I breathe of you.

I folded it up as wrote on the top of the paper… The future Mrs. Edward Anthony Meson Cullen. I had spotted a couple of red tulips growing outside on the edge of her property. I quickly flew over there, choosing one of the larger ones and went back into her house. I had once explained to her that flowers had different meanings during my time and that during courtship flowers were exchanged to tell your attend different thing – I had chosen red tulips because they meant true love.

The trip home only took a couple of moments. I had run this path almost every morning for a little more than a year and my smells severed as a link between her house and mine. The autumn winds were starting to change things and in another couple of months the ground and trees would be bearded. All around me change happens as I stay the same. I don't remember how many springs turn into summer in my existences, but it always was sad to watch. Just serves as another reminder that I will be forever unchanged.

The forest opened into the back part of the lawn and I could see Jasper crossing the grounds towards the barn which served as our garage. He was wearing a pair of torn jeans, a Lynard Skynard T-shirt and no shoes. His new Apple Air was tucked into his arms. Alice must have been too busy with the wedding, because I noticed the Jazz getting away with his favorite look a lot more. Down deep he was still a good ole' boy from Texas, a hundred year hadn't change that.

Any other time, Jasper would have been dress more for a walk down New York's fashion week than hanging out at home. Poor guy, I knew he put up with a lot with Alice.

He nodded at me as we made our way into the barn.

When Jasper first joined us, he seemed lost. Not sure what to do with his time. I had offered to teach him the guitar to help him adjust, which he did take me up on. After breaking the guitar a couple of times, he learned the control he needed to handle the instrument and to our utter shock, the guy could also sing. But he didn't find his thing until the dawn of the computer age.

Emmett had bought himself a robot in the early seventies and couldn't figure out how to put it together. Jasper decided out of shear boredom to look at it and the rest was history. Who knew that the Southern Rebel was a computer genius in disguise?

Every once in awhile you hear about this virus that does strange thing to the computer of some powerful company or university and rest a sure it is a very bored vampire with too much on times on his hands. The best one was by far was the dancing baby of the late 90s. The virus was so popular that it had a recurring guess roll on _Alley McBeal_. Jasper had been pissed that they gave the credit to another.

"You're loving this aren't you," I said to Jasper as we entered the garage.

_"No, I want this thing over with. Between you, her and Bella I have been nothing but an emotional bomb ready to go off any minute now. Do you know I am starting to care about the difference between violet and lavender and I am color blind?"_

I stopped dead. "Vampires can be color blind?"

"I was in human life."

I complete forgot that. He had gained the ability to see colors when crossed over and became a vampire; we think. He still was having trouble telling the difference between colors at time. Carlisle thinks it because he spent his human life and part of his vampire life not having to worry about the color.

"So why are you putting up with it."

_"Ask me that question again after fifty years of marriage."_

We entered the garage by now. I was used to these one way conversations and didn't bother me. Emmett yes, me no. I felt more natural talking to people like this, except Bella. There is one thing I will never be able to share with her - her mind was like the ultimate Christmas present. I could keep unwrapping it and never get to the core of it; just little surprise discoveries.

"It looks like Carlisle's car," Jasper said out loud. Carlisle's Mercedes was part of C class, a kind of run of the mill if you ask me, but he didn't want anything to noticeable. Most people in Forks drove American made trucks. He preferred German engineering over American. The only Americans we had in this garage were Em's Jeep and Jasper's Harley Street Bob, Nightster, and his newest purchase a XR1200. Jasper wasn't the car-worshipper that Rosalie, I and now Alice were. He could drive, somewhat, but he prefer motorcycles.

"It's suppose to, what type of safety car this baby would be if it didn't blend in." Rosalie said scooting out from under the car. "We made it took look like any other Mercedes.

The Mercedes Guardian – the most indestructible car in existence today. Rosalie's pet project for the last two years had finally been born into a reality. Under Rosalie perfect socialite exterior lived a grease monkey who preferred the smell of fine motor oil to the sweat scent of French Perfumes. Makes me kind of wonder what Bella would be into after all was said and done. I shook my head. I hated the fact that I was becoming more at easy with her becoming a vampire in my mind. I shouldn't be thinking like that.

"Heat resistance paint in mocha black metallic," Rosalie said tapping on the cars shinny black exterior. "We took a couple of fire torches to it, not one chip."

_It just looks black to me_, Jazz thought.

"Four thousand ponds of body armor, it would stop a tank dead in it tracks or Emmett," Rosalie continued like a mother bragging about her child.

"Because we know how much of problem tanks are in this town," Emmett laugh. He was sitting on one of Rose work tables playing with one of favorite tools. Wonder how long that was going to last. Rose tools were like my piano, nobody touched them. Emmett had been Rose test subject when developing the body armor for this car. If he couldn't dent it going at high speeds is when she approved of the chemical compound of the body armor. It was fun watch Emmett try to ripe this one apart after he couldn't break through it; another thing that had beaten Emmett, a sheet of highly treated metal.

"Knowing Bella, she would be the first person to be run over by a tank in this town since, when Emmett," Jasper laughed. I just rolled my eyes used to their constants jokes about Bella bad luck streak. It was now their favorite thing to bet on. I wasn't worried about the tanks; I was worried about the damn logging trucks that think Forks speed limit was the same as the opened highways. Plus Bella wasn't a good driver, she even scared me.

"Well according to the local farmer's almanac, since the dawn of time."

Rosalie ignored them; she was too busy showing off her baby. "Missile proof glass," she tapped the glass.

"What ever happened to bullet proof," Emmett said.

"Get with the times, Em. Everything is bullet proof nowadays," Jasper said.

"It has a GPS Global tracking, an mp3 player that can hold over 600 hours of music, wireless hookup, can reach speeds of 200 mph and has extra cup holders,"

"Because we all know how important extra cup holders are," Jasper said. Why did they have to be here?

"So why am I allowing this human to drive it," she asked. Bella has advanced from the thing to the human, which was a mark up in Rose book. Emmett had told me to give it some time; it took almost a decade or two for her to warm up to Alice. Plus Alice wasn't making the one choice in Rose book was insulting - becoming one of us. The rest of the family couldn't wait, but she thought that Bella was throwing her life away.

"Because the true test of it indestructibility is if it can survive Bella bad luck," Em laugh.

Rose tossed me the keys. "One scratch and she is going to wish she could die." I knew Rose didn't mean it. She was the one who offered it to me when she found out I was in the mark for a "safe" before car. I had already picked out Bella's after car; one that she is probably going to kill me on; it was fast, foreign, expensive and bright red.

"Let's take a look at this baby," said Jasper as he opened the door to sit in the front seat. "It took only a couple of minuets for Jasper to get into the inner workings of the car. "Wow, talk about some nice firewalls you have there Rose." Jasper might not be impressed with an expensive car, but you can really blow his mind with the right type of computer firewall.

He started to down load the music into the mp3 player while checking out what else this car had to internal offer. Most of the music had come off her Ipod, one of my engagement presents from me when she had lifted the ban on gift giving. It was something she was interesting in, the type of music I liked, so I got her the new Ipod Touch with half of my music collection down loaded into it. They were personal favorites, songs that remind me of her or pieces that I have wrote and recorded. I was glad she seemed to have the broad taste in music that I had because most of our "dates" had center around music.

She had given me a Kindle – a type of wireless library where she downloaded the books and poems that she liked. It had been one of my favorite gifts along with the eternity watch that I wore.

"_Does Bella know that you are putting a tracking device on this car_," Jasper asked one the music had been down loaded.

"Yes, I already talked it over with her, she understands," I said remembering the conversation. She had not been pleased with the idea, but I told her it was for my piece of mind. She had laid down a condition and I now had the same tracking device on my phone. She didn't like double standards.

"_Not saying that I don't understand why you're doing this, Edward, just think it is a little strange_," Jasper thought. We were way past strange in this relationship; and if it was anyone else but Bella I wouldn't have been too worry, but she attracts damager. She is the only person I knows that has fallen in love and tried to seduce a vampire, and became friends with a pack of werewolves.

"Does this worrying end once she is vampire," I asked Jasper.

Jasper looked at me and rolled his eyes. He took out his Blackberry and showed me a little dot that was pacing on a map of our house.

_Ask me that one in fifty years too._

It was about seven when I pulled up to her house to pick her up for her last day at work. She wanted to give the Newtons two weeks noticed before she quiet her job, why I don't know. It wasn't if she will be working again, like most mortals. She asked me what she was going to do with all of her free time and I told her she would find something.

Her father was out on the porch drinking coffee when I pulled up. _Great it's him_. Well at least I graduated from the _ass._ _Holy shit is that the car!_

I had told Charlie about the car I wanted to get her. Well not get her. The official story was that my father's best friend was a car designer and he had offered the car to Bella as a loaner until we could get her another car; a pre-wedding present to help her out. It was kind of true.

I had been very shocked when the next day Bella truck finally whined its last whizzed and now was more of a lawn ordainment than anything else. Thankfully Jacob had thought of disappearing and Rosaline wouldn't touch something like that. She had been willing to put the air bags after Em and I had followed her around the house pleading. Em had a soft spot for Bella.

So the truck was official pronounced dead and for the last couple of days I have been playing chauffer to Bella while waiting for her car to arrive.

I had my theory about the whole death of the truck – but Charlie was about as quiet in the mind as Bella was. And if he did murder the truck, than he had my eternal gratitude for it and I would hold that secret.

"Bella, he is here," Charlie shouted. Ever since Renee had sided with me on this whole marriage issue, he refused call me by name. I was he, your fiancé, it or the thing. I swear he knows what I am going to be doing to his daughter, even though Carlisle has rest assure me it has nothing to do with me being a vampire and every thing to do with me being the boy who was taken his little girl away.

Bella came flying out of her house in her less than graceful meaner, her hair was wet and messily, pushed back into some sort of weird bun thing. She must have over slept her alarm – again. I smiled and she stopped dead. Like a dear in headlights and groaned.

Charlie got up from the porch and walked around the car. "I guess it will do, right Bells."

Will do? This thing was safer than that rusty tin coffin that you gave her. The truck didn't even have proper seat belts and no air bag.

"Thank you, I think," she said when she covered from her shocked. Most girls would be ecstatic about the prospect of getting an expensive car from their fiancé, Bella on the other hand.

"Don't you think it's a little to flash for around here, I thought we agreed on a "sensible" car?"

Charlie was still admiring the car to pay any attention to it. _Wonder how much horse power is behind this baby. Probably eats gas, but man it good looking._

"Trust me it is sensible," I said opened the door for her. She glared at me and slid into the driver seat. I smiled at Charlie and got into the passenger side.

"This isn't what I meant by sensible," she grumbled. I smiled, one day she is going to realize I like to spoil her and she is just going to get use to it. I leaned over, whispering in her ears, allowing my breath to tickle her.

"You look very sexy in it," I said. Her cheeks turned red and her heart started to race. "Very Sexy. I never got my good morning kiss," I said.

"Charlie still around," she said, trying to catch her breath. She was modest for the most part, which I liked. Not shy behind closed door either, which was perfect for me. I didn't want the rest of the world to see what I got to. While at school I was very affectionate, staking my claim for the world to know, and to scare those who would try to infringe on my claim. I love her and she was mine. Mine alone.

I laugh. "One side tint glass, you can see out, but nobody could see in." I said taping the glass. I lean over and kissed her right in front of Charlie and Charlie wasn't any wiser. _I am not sure I like that I can't see in._ "Sound proof too."

I pulled away, only because I knew Bella had to drive and sometime it took her a couple of minutes or hours to recover from my kissing. If I was driving; I wouldn't care that she was dazzled but I rather not her drive without her full sense.

Our venom was one of the strangest pheromone on earth. Deadly to those of our world (werewolves, shape shifters and others) but for a human it could mean the difference between life and existence. It had an amazing ability to heal (or set into stone). The smell emitted off was seducing to humans too. Bella accuse me of dazzling her more than once, but the fact was it was my venom that caused all those strange reactions to her body. And like humans, our venom was different on each vampire. We stake claims over territories and mates that way.

She buckled her seat belt and started to pull out of the drive way.

Tanks, missiles and Em, I knew the car can handle. Her ability to attract all that is dangerous. Not to sure.

"This car isn't cost you a cent?"

"Nope, Rosaline was one of the designer behind it and wanted to do a test run," I said as fidget with the radio. "Jasper added your play list here and a couple of other things. It has a GPS, an itinerary. Sorry Alice insisted on that feature. Plus a hands free phone that all you have to do is connect yours into."

All of sudden the dancing baby appeared on the screen with the music of the Stones _Let's Spend the Night Together._ "Jazz has a weird sense of humor." I said as Bella started to laugh. What can I say, he might be shy and quiet at times but Jasper always lets himself be known.

"So do I dear ask how much this cost?"

"Why? Do you like it," I said.

"It does drive better than my truck and I could get used to the tinted windows." I might have finally got through to her.

"How much did your father pay for your truck?"

"About $200. why"

"Well if he would have bought you the same truck every day of the year since you were born for this."

We stopped at stoplight and she put her head down on the staring wheel and groaned. I will never understand her fixation with people wanting to spoil her. Her mother wasn't in my book of people I like – mostly having to do with how Bella was raised. When I first meet Bella she had this thin jacket. Bella on average probably weights about little over 110 pounds – and she has very little fat on her. So this thin jacket was suppose to keep this 110 pound girl warm during what is known as the coldest wettest place in the continental United States. Point one off. The second thing was the fact that Bella mom grew up here and knew the weather. Point two off. And the third point had been the first time I had met her. Her mother came flying through the hospital with hair extensions, perfectly manicure nails and designer clothing and bag (not what Alice wears but stuff that does cost a good amount). She couldn't buy her daughter a half way decent jacket but she could spend money on herself?

It was a problem that for the last year I have been slowly correcting. Slowly but surely her Wal-Mart brand jeans and pants have been replaced by designer jeans (Alice had to take the tags off first). We hid two jackets in her closet. She is still trying to figure out when she bought them. And other pieces of knock off clothing had gone missing and been replaced by the real things. She thought she was finally filling out her clothing, but in fact her clothing just fits her better.

That didn't include the clothing in 'our closet' and 'our room' at the house.

"Did I mention that you look sexy behind the wheel?"

We had finally pulled into the parking lot of Newton Sportswear. The parking lot was empty – the Newton's were going to be here for another half an hour.

"You could have gotten me something less expensive, Edward."

I turned off the music, ready for another one of our discussions. As much as we talked and got things off our chest during last couple of weeks, there was one thing that needed to be discuss and I guessed it was here and now.

"It has nothing to do with the money. I am not trying to buy your affections; I am not trying to show people that I deserved to be by your side or trying to stake my claim on you through things. Do you need six hundred thousand dollar car, no. Nobody does – but you deserve it."

"Bella I had watched you do without things, not have enough and make excuses to why you don't have these things."

She opened her mouth and I pressed my finger against her lips. It was our way of telling the other that this was our time to have the floor. Something we both respected. You need to hear this love. "You know your parents aren't you're my favorite people in the world, especially your mother."

Her eyes were string with tears, but I needed to press on. I hate doing this to her but at the same time we had learn that bottling up our thoughts and trying to please the other person doesn't work either.

"She sent you to Forks with a jacket that couldn't keep a 300 pound man warm, let alone you. She lived here, for God sakes; she should know what the weather was like. And it doesn't help my presentation that Charlie didn't fix the situations.

"Bella I have sat here and listen to you make excuses on why she didn't get you things, and than see her run around spending more money on herself, Phil and her house than you, it hurts me. She made you believe that you aren't worthy to be treated special and you are probably the most worthy person I know."

Confession time, Alice was probably going to kill me, but Bella needed to understand this. "I love you, more than I can even being to fathom. I am the one who bought you those two jackets, including the one you are wearing. Alice has been replacing your wardrobe with better made clothing. And love, right now you are sitting in a hundred dollar pair of panties and bra from Victoria Secrets, a pair of two hundred dollar jeans from New Religion and a hundred and fifty dollar pair of Nike shoes. The clothes not only fit you well but they keep you warm and dry. And you haven't complain about your feet hurting either"

"I am sorry if you are anger with me, but Alice is in agreement. Love you deserved to be treated special. The times I take you out for fancy meals, to different events and music concerts, I am not doing it for me. I want you to feel special, to feel warm, love and safe and happy. I want you to one day wake up and realize how beautiful and sexy you really are, and feel it."

I took a deep breath in and looked at her again. She was silently crying. Great I had made her miserable.

"Thank you." She whispered between the tears.

I took her face between my hands, softly cresting it, and feeling the electricity shoot through me. "You're very welcome."

She smiled and I realized I had finally gotten through to her. That she finally realizing what she makes me feel and how truly beautiful she is. How much I cherish her beyond anything else.

She wiped the tears from her eyes and smiled. "So we are alone in this parking lot..."

"For the next ten minutes." She looked at me and smirked. I knew where this was leading. We had this game we played, mostly at my house, but sometimes at hers, when we sure that Charlie wasn't going to be home. It really was childish, because she would never win but I still liked playing it.

The game was this. She tried to get out of her buckle and out the door before I got to her door to let her out. She never won. And today wasn't going to be an exception. I had her flying through the air in a mater of seconds, laughing as I slammed into the side of the car. She was press hard against me, her face buried in my chest as she laughed. Her laughing causing my chest to vibrate and I could feel the warmth off of her. I love her laughter; it was the single most joyous sound of my life – second being her heart beat.

She was laughing hard now. It never sis to amazed me what most people would be utterly scary out of their wits by this, she found fun. She loved to run with me when I was being myself in the forest. She loved how high I could climb and the world that I could show her. Even though some of our dates were to concerts and shows, the other dates were to the great out doors where I can be free. I loved that I could be a vampire around her and she encouraged it.

"You know you only have a couple of weeks before I will have a better chance to win," she said as tried to control her laughter.

I smiled down, pushing the curls away from her face. At times like this we weren't human and vampire. But man and women, two equal halves of a whole. The ying and yang of the world. She made me human and for her I would be human.

"No I will be always faster than you, I just might not be able swing you about as easy as I could. By the way you still owe me that good morning kiss."

"I do, don't I," she whispered and stretch her toes to meet my lips and her hands around my neck. I grabbed her around the butt and pushed her upward on my chest so I could have full excess to her lips.

The first taste of her lips had been the most in creditable thing I have ever tasted. I thought it could be better than that, than I kissed her for the second time, and it was better than I could imagine. And last night kiss I thought was the best. But right now this one had to be the best. Her lips brushed against mine and it never sis to amaze me how open and willing she was to have her body pressed up against me and her lips on mine. I could feel her tongue touch my lips.

I had explained her once that our tongues were coated with the venom, so I would have to wait until she was one of us before I would be able to really kiss her. But she was free to do what she wanted with her tongue, as long as I stayed in control.

_Ew…get a room. I bet Bella would be willing to open her legs for any rich guy. I bet he isn't her first either. You know what they say about those city girls._

Newton was really pressing his luck to day; he better be glad that I was in a good mood right now and could care less what some insignificant human male was thinking. So I did the mature thing.

I squeezed her but with one hand and shot him the birdie with the other.

_Asshole._

Mike stomped away; I bet that just made his day. "Mike's getting on your nerves again, isn't he?"

I forgot how well Bella knew me.

"Are you sure I can't kill him, nobody would know."

She shook her head. I could here Esme Lexus USV come rolling in the parking lot. Em, Carlisle, Jasper, and I were driving to Seattle for the final fitting on our tux. They were picking me up from Newtons.

"I got to go," she said, but her voice wasn't convincing. It's not like they could fire her, but she wasn't one to skip out either. There were a couple of times I had convinced her to skip school on sunny days – mostly with the promise of a trip to our meadow. But for the most part if it was longer than a day, she would go to school.

I looked her in the eyes, "I'll see you tonight, love."

She gave me a quick peak on the lips. "I'll be waiting for you." I reached inside the car to turn off the ignition. Mike was waiting for her at the door.

"Bella, here these are yours. Enjoy the car." I said tossing the keys more at Mike than Bella. Mike instantly reached out and grabbed them.

_Is that the Mercedes Guardian – that car cost about what $400,000. Where in the hell did he buy that from? Is his family like some sort of Middle East terrorist group or a drug dealer? Rich Freak._

Yah, I was one. But I couldn't care less. Bella loved me freak in all.

"Hey Bella, watch out for tanks," yelled Emmett across the parking lot.

Rich freak with a even stranger family. Run Bella they only get worse once you joined.

******************************************Author Note**************************************************************

Just a couple of things - I forgot to say this and I am well aware that most of you should know it. But for legal purpose. I do not own Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse or Break Dawn nor any of the characters that are associated with it. So no suing because I am worth a car, a surf board two computers and a very lazy dog.

There is an actual Mercedes Guardian, Stephenie did not make it up. Thanks to Tony at my local Mercedes dealership, who was welling to tell me about it. The cost begins about $400,000 and can go up to half a million depending on what you want in that car. It did have all the features that Jazz and Em were cracking jokes about.

Rose's involvement with the Mercedes Guardian has a lot to do with my uncle involvement with the Ford company. Automotive companies do hire outside consultants and developers for key projects and I wanted to show a little more personal side of the Cullen's life. They have been around for centuries, so that have dabbled in their area of interest more than once. No Rose is not the actual creator of the Guardian, I don't know who is, but for my story she is.

We really don't see much of Jasper personal side because all four books are either told through Bella perspective or Jacob's perspective. I did notice in 'Midnight Sun' (to read it go to ) that Jasper has more of a rounded personality, because he interacts more with Edward. Jasper is more quiet, stays in himself and is somewhat of a technology geek. I am very sensitive to other people's energy (emotions) than most people so I have a tendency to stay away from overly emotional people. With that, I wrote Jasper such as that. But along with it, he has a good sense of human, really loyal and Edward and him have had their share of problems.

And last, there will be a lot of reference to two other stories I am working on called 'The vampire in Me' and 'The Human in Me', both take place after the events of Eclipse and before Breaking Dawn. In the 'The Vampire in Me', Bella and Edward work through a lot of issues and Bella learns alot more about being a vampire. In 'the Human in Me', Bella and Edward take a trip back to Chicago, where both Edward and Bella learn about Edward's human life.

Feel free to comment.


	3. Chapter 2 Flowers

Rising Sun

Chapter 2 – Flowers

_They are not long, the days of wine and roses:_

_Out of a misty dream_

_Our path emerges for a while, then closes_

_Within a dream._

- Ernest Dowson

The bells welcomed me into the shop on the town square. The building was an old Queen Ann style, with the shop down stairs and the residents living up stairs. Forks didn't have much to choose from in the way of stores, but for some strange reason, it did have a florist; a very nice surprise in this sleepy town.

It was the reason almost everything we bought had to be shipped in. This town didn't have decent retail to choose from.

The biggest news was when the Wal-Mart finally opened on the outskirts of town. Emmett was in his glory. He found it fascinating that you can buy tires, condoms, guns and beer all at the same place.

"This is what heaven is, man," he said as he dragged me down one of the isles.

I hated the place. It was too busy and overwhelming to me. It had way to much stuff.

"Why do you even need condoms," I asked one of the times that he dragged me there.

"Oh there are a lot of things you can do with them; Carlisle and Esme are going out of town this week, right."

"What ever you are planning, leave me out. I came here to look at flowers." I could see the plan forming in his mind and I debated wither or not I should warn Esme.

Emmett did go through with his plans and poor Carlisle and Esme came back to the house decorated in blown up condoms.

"Well, at least we know they are practicing safe sex, dear," Carlisle said as Esme stood there dumb founded over her lovely room decorated with blow up condoms of every shape and color.

"That's not the best part," Emmett screamed and turned off the lights "They glow in the dark."

I am just glad that Emmett didn't know until later that Bella's mother had shipped her some condoms, afraid that with our ranging teenage hormons that we weren't being safe.

I left Emmett alone in the condom isle and headed towards the floral department, to see if their was any small chance that there was a decent floriest on hand. Surprise - there wasn't.

Wal-Mart couldn't do what I wanted. They shipped their flowers already preassemble. "Most guys buy their girl friends a dozen roses and call it a day." I would never give Bella a rose, rose mean false love.

Romance was dead – it had died about the same time I had. I remember some of my friends starting to court back when I was human. The planning for introductions, the anticipating in being allowed to court the girl of choice, the hidden messages and flowers, notes and presents. Now of days, we just get them drunk.

"Do you ever miss the way things were," I asked Emmett as we stood in the line waiting for the guy behind the counter to finish ringing up a cart full of condoms and some new air fresheners.

"Miss what," he asked, not paying attention to the young man who was having a heart attack. I don't understand what the big deal was…we went to school with him. He saw us day in and day out. I guess after being around Bella, you kind of forget how normal humans are supposed to act.

"Courting," I said. "The whole process, it seems everything is rushed now of days."

"Not really, I hated the meeting of the father. You know I was seeing this girl back when I was human. Her father would be cleaning his guns when I came a calling."

"You're kidding," I said.

"Yep, until the one day I got smart and brought my guns in and told him straight out while I was waiting for his daughter to get pretty up, I might as well do something productive."

I had to laugh, I though Emmett stories couldn't get more outrages and he would tell you another one. Bella had asked me more than once if he was pulling her legs. I said, "Nope Emmett doesn't do that sort of thing, he's honest."

"But you know what I miss; I miss the way people used to talk to each other. When we court we would sit all night on the porch talking, about different things, you really got to know the girl. Now of days it is rushed and get married. No wonder why human were always getting divorce.

"That will be $350.25, sir," the cashier squeaked.

Like I said I really didn't want to know.

"Good evening Mr. Cullen," said Gus, the owner of Gus's Flowers. Gus had been a very famous florist in his youth, but had retired to this town to fish. He ran the flower shop out of his house; his back yard was his greenhouse. Gus had told me on my very first visit that he missed the flowers too much and his daughter suggested doing it part time.

Gus had been amazed when I showed up with the list. As he read down my list of flowers I wanted in this bouquet and asked if I understood what these flowers meant.

"I believe tulips mean true love, blue violets represent faithfulness," I said trying not to give away to much information. I had grown up during a time when romance and court was important. My father had explained to me once that it isn't about the given of the flowers that meant so much but the thought. "You want to choose the flowers that best represent your feelings. Take the Freesia that I give to your mom, they represent friendship…she is my best friend, Edward and her friendship means a lot to me."

"How are you this evening, Gus," I asked walking towards the back of the shop were his work bench was. Alice had order all the flower from here, but it was my special order that I was interested in.

"Well what do you think," he said. I walked around the amorous arrangement amazed in how he made the color and texture flow into a piece of art.

"You are truly a master," I said.

"There are not many commissions I would say this, son, but yours has truly been a pleasure."

I handed him the note that was going to accomplish it. Tomorrow was my wedding day and the first thing I wanted Bella to see when she woke up was this arrangement of flowers.

"I have a couple of things to finish up and than my son-in-law will be delivering it. I will see you later tomorrow and sir congratulations,"

Gus' son-in-law was one of Charlie officers so the whole family had been invited to the wedding.

That was done; I made my way across town towards Bella's house. Hopefully I could bow out of tonight's festivity that Jasper and Emmett have been calling 'Edwards Final Blow Out Before the Blow Out.' Jasper refuses to think about it when I am around and he wouldn't tell Em so I have no idea what he was planning. But something tells me they will soon or later find me.

**************************************************************************************************************

"I miss you already,"

"I don't need to leave, I can stay," I whispered. I leaned down is brush my lips across her jaw and in the silent of the night I could hear her heart beat. I was really going to miss that sound.

"Mmm," she said gliding her lips back to mine.

For the last month we had pushed and pulled at the boundaries that use to separate us. Mostly to prepare me for the honeymoon, but also because we were at that point in our relationship where we were ready and wanted for more. That chaste kisses that have standard most of our relationship had not become enough. If we had been normal teenagers the next step would have been sex, something I am both looking forward to and scared about. But we weren't normal teenagers. I was a vampire and she was a human and that could never be ignored. But in the silence of the evening we could forget all about that. I moved my hand under her (my) shirt, surprised and happy to see that she wasn't wearing a bra. Another one of those boundaries we crossed during the summer. She gasped and arched herself up toward me.

I covered her lips as she allowed a long moan to escape. The last thing I need was Charlie to come in here to see me on top of daughter with my hands inside her (my) shirt.

She had taken to wearing my shirts during the nights I would be hunting. She said it made her feel I was their wrapping my arms around her. I thought she looked sexy in nothing but a pair of my underwear and my shirts; which is how she greeted me tonight.

I moved my thumb in a circle around her breast. Touching her always sent currents of electricity through my body. Touching her like was just like a lightening bolt, more intense and exciting. I could feel my breath coming in rasp and I had to stop myself. A very strange thing happen when I started to breath like this, she would stop. She had passed out on me a couple of times. Not for long, but enough to make me aware of what I was doing. I moved other hand under her shirt giving the other breast the full attention it needed. I could stay here all night lost in her body. She groaned again wrapping her hands around my back, scrapping her fingers up and down them.

I pulled the shirt up, kiss the underside of her breast and her stomach. Even with the blanket, wrapped around her lower half, we still had this moment of intimacy together.

She giggled a little as I covered my head with her shirt. I skim my face against her belly, feeling the goose bumps rising. I covered her again, not allowing her to get cold. It was still too warm for us to justify the heat, so we were reduce to a blanket.

I stopped for a moment to look down at her; her eyes were closed and her mind was silent. How did I become this luck? She was everything I had ever wanted and needed. I couldn't have design a more perfect women for me, even if I tried. She opened her eyes and looked at me, puzzled. _What are you thinking love_. What would I give for even a moment in that mind of hers?

She had the most beautiful soul, pure and clean. It was more beautiful than her eyes, more beautiful than body, and more beautiful than her caring nature. It was a soul that belongs to heaven, not to me. But she had given it to me, with no conditions. Me, the monster. I loved her more for it.

She pulled my face towards her again.

"Definitely staying," I mummer on her lips. Wild horses or Emmett couldn't drag me away.

"No, no. It's your bachelor party. You have to go," she whispered with very little convention. As she said it she locked her hands into my hair and pulled me closer to her as if that could hold me here. And it could.

I stroke her face, memorizing it. For this would be the last time I would be kissing Bella Swan. Tomorrow kiss would be on Isabella Cullen. I liked the sound of that Bella Cullen, Mrs. Isabella Cullen, Mrs. Edward Cullen, my wife.

"Bachelor parties are designed for those who are sad to see the passing of their single days. I couldn't be more eager to have mine behind. So there's really no point." To me the real celebration was here in this room, I was saying good bye to Bella Swan and hello to Bella Cullen. It was bittersweet in some ways because it was the passing of my first love into my true love. The girl who turned into the women I was destining to spend the rest of eternity with.

"True," she breathed against my throat, not knowing how erotic that was. In vampire world that was the most vulnerable place. But I trust her completely with it. I let out a low pitch growl, something I knew she wouldn't be able to hear. But it always surprised me how her body responded to it, arch up to the call. Her smell was changing and I would soon have to pull away. This was a stronger smell more aciculate than her usual bowling me over smell. It was like the boulder was accomplished with other boulders, hitting me at the same time. I didn't know what caused it and still haven't worked myself to the courage to ask Jasper or Emmett about it.

I finally gotten pass the whole venom issue, to have another road block in our every journey to make this work.

She ran her hand down my chest and I shudder. She came up with a new rule this summer. I wasn't allow to wear a shirt when we were alone and found the most unique ways to get it off including (which wasn't one of my favorite) attacking me with a pair of scissors. Needless to say after that, I just decided to give in, and my shirt lay on the floor. The trouble is I kept forget them at her place and now was resorting to borrowing shirts.

Bella's collection now had a bunch of mine, two of Jasper, one of Emmett's and Carlisle.

"You could always ask for them back," Carlisle said as he handed me one. If Alice was so wrapped up in the planning my wedding, I wouldn't be in this fix.

"I want my _Boobies Make Me Happy_, shirt back, Edward. Tell you Kleptomania fiancé she is only allowed to keep yours," shouted Em from down stares.

_Tell the human I owe her one,_ Rosalie thought, she hated that shirt.

A light shiver ran through me again and my mouth found hers. She opened her mouth and let her tongue run against my lips.

I had to pull away, between the tongue and the smell and my venom I was starting to lose control. I came from a time where sexual gratification wasn't allowed and spent the most of my existence rejecting any other type of physical gratification so this was new waters were I treaded. I didn't know the end of my control which scared me, but at the same time I knew Bella was right, we couldn't just go from 0 to 60 and hope everything worked out. I had pushed the limits a couple of time, beyond what I thought I should do, without it being disastrous. All times she passed out on me, or was holding on to her consistence barely. Tonight was one of those nights I could easily pushed the boundaries, but I shouldn't.

I wouldn't do if the bride was still dazzled at the altar. Plus dealing with Tanya was enough – Bella was going to have to have her wits with her.

I started to pull away, hating myself even more. The look of disappointment on her face was enough to make me throw caution to the wind and allow her to be worshiped. After tomorrow if she passes out on me, than that's okay.

"Wait," she said, gripping my shoulders and hugging herself to me. "Practice makes perfect," she said wrapping one leg around my waist. I could feel the electricity run.

"Well, we should be fairly close to perfection by this point, then, shouldn't we? Have you slept at all in the last month?" In the last month our physical relation had taken more headway than before. I am still amazed that Charlie hadn't busted in four nights ago. We learned something very interested that would have deftly got me shot. We found a way to get rid of the sexual tension that had been building up without compromising, sort of. I still was shaking from that experience, and Bella was glowing. Charlie had left very early on a fishing trip and we stayed here all day, trying this new thing out. But even though she did pass out more than once, I could control it.

"But this is dress rehearsal," she whispered climbing on top of me. The smell was coming at me in full force now. I had to stop. "And we've only practiced certain scenes. It's no time for playing it safe," she lean down and whispered in my ears, her shirt riding up so I can feel her breast on my chest. Shit I was starting to react. I couldn't keep the control anymore. I was losing it. _Stop it now Edward before it was too late. Before you either kill her or kill her_

"Bella," I whispered.

"Don't start this again. A deal is a deal." Why did I have to make that stupid deal? I had allowed her off the hook about the wedding but she is keeping us both to the contract. Wedding – Wedding night. My great wish and fear. I had spent a month planning this, how to make this as comfortable for her.

"I don't know. It's too hard to concentrate when you're with me like this. I – I can't think straight. I wouldn't be able to control myself. You'll get hurt," I said at once voicing my fears. We have been over and over this again. But I still had my doubts.

"I'll be fine." Typical Bella answer, rush head long into the danger without thinking.

"Bella,"

"Shh!" she pressed her lips and for a moment I forgot; until her tongue touched my lips reminding me why I stopped before.

"How are your feet," I asked trying to clear my head.

"Nice and toasty warm," she said showing me her feet. They were covered by socks.

"Really, No second thoughts? It's not too late to change your mind." Alice might kill her but I think I could protect her from the hyper active pixie.

"Are you trying to ditch me," she asked, not taking me too serious

"Just making sure. I don't want you to do anything your not sure about," I chuckled.

"I'm sure about you. The rest I can live through," she said. I had to admit she was putting up with a lot from Alice. If Bella had her way, it would be t-shirt, blue jeans and an Elvis impersonator at a drive through window.

"Can you." I said. "I don't mean the wedding – which I am positive you will survive despite your qualm – but afterwards…what about Renee, what about Charlie." We had discussed the plan through and through. We would do the honeymoon and than come back here for a month before heading to Alaska, to our hunting lodge. Carlisle, Bella and me. There I would take her life. The others would join us afterwards to help us. In about a year we would move to New Hampshire. Carlisle would tell Renee and Charlie that we had been killed in accident. I knew it was hard for them, but it was for their own protection. Alice was even working on the funeral, closed casket of course. Bella understood it too. She knew that the rules were set in stone and the Volturi would kill her parents and us if they knew the secret.

"I'll miss them."

At least she was being honest.

"Angela and Ben and Jessica and Mike," I said. Personally I could care less if Jessica or Mike fell off the edge of the world, but they were Bella friends. And at times the only thing that was keeping either of them alive. Angela and Ben I liked and wish all the luck. I had gotten to know Ben more when I tricked him into asking Angela out and than during the cooking classes I was taking at the local community center – I needed to learn how to take care of Bella. Ben was interested in the culinary arts. We were partners, he still was nervous around me but I came to respect him.

"I'll miss my friends, too," she said. Bella hadn't really made that many close friends outside my family. She told me that she didn't have any close friends in Phoenix either. Her and Alice had hit it off and were tight. Alice loved her like a sister and vies versa. Jasper liked Bella because of the friendship between the two, and was very protective of her.

"Especially Mike." She laughed, throwing her arm over her head in a dramatic effect. "Oh, Mike! How will I go on?" She knew that Mike wasn't one of my favorite people and most of the times she just rolled her eyes. I can't believe once upon a time I saw Mike as a rival."

I growled in a playful manner. She was still laughing at me. She stopped sudden and straightened up.

"Edward, we've been through this and through this. I know it will be hard, but this is what I want. I want you, and I want you forever. One lifetime is simply not enough for me." How much has she changed from the girl who begged me on prom night to change her to women who knew her mind? I have been glad I have been around for the change. She understood what it meant, feared it and respected the changes.

"Frozen forever at eighteen," I whispered. We would be teenagers forever, not something I was happy about.

"Every woman's dream come true," she said.

"Never changing….never moving forward."

"What does that mean?"

I didn't want to darken my wedding, but we learn in the past that we shouldn't be afraid of speaking our uncertainty. There wasn't anything out there that we couldn't face, but I sometimes wonder if one time I will say something that will make her run the other way.

I took a deep breath. "Do you remember when we told Charlie we were getting married? And he thought you were…" I hated saying this. "Pregnant".

"And he thought about shooting you," she laugh. I am glad she thought that her father shooting me was something to laugh about. Especially since the bullets would have bounced off me and we would have had a hard time explain why.

"What, Edward?"

I closed my eyes. "I just wish…well, I wish that he'd been right."

Her eyes shout up in surprised. I never expressed in interest in children before. As much as both Rosalie and Esme had thought about it, I had always believed it was something that could never be, so why think about it. But as Charlie accused me of 'knocking up' his daughter; an image had form in my mine; an image of a little girl with brown curly hair and deep brown eyes running through the forest. She had my smile and Bella's nose. I shook my head, knowing that image could never be, if it had, Carlisle would have found a way to give that to Esme.

She gasped.

"More that there was some way he could have been right. That we had that kind of potential. I hate taking that away from me."

"I know what I am doing." She had assured me that she had the "fun" of raising a human being and wasn't sure that she did a great job with Renee. Renee did what she wanted without much regards to the people around her. Bella even pointed out that she failed the egg project in health her sophomore year and killed three gold fish before giving up on the whole idea of pets. Right now she was thinking about motherhood with a teenage mind. But what happens when in the future when she realize she gave up part of womanhood. Would she hate me than for changing her?

"How could you know that, Bella" Look at my mother, look at my sister. It's not as easy a sacrifice as you imagine?" It was part of the reason why Rosalie still regarded her with little contempt. In Rose book she was given away the one thing Rose wanted desperately – to have a child. I had seen both Rose and Esme mind as they watch a mother with her child – the pain and longing had echo through it. It was something that Emmett or Carlisle could never fix.

"Esme and Rosalie get by just fine. If it's a problem later, we can do what Esme did – we'll adopt."

How could she not hate me for taking that away? She just didn't understand what she would be given up. "It's not right!" I said a little louder than I should. I hated myself that I couldn't be human. I couldn't give her children; that the image of the little girl would never be form in reality. She would always be an image. "I don't want you to have to make sacrifices for me. I want to give you things, not take things away from you. I don't want to steal your future. If I were human-"

She put her hand over my mouth, stopping my voice from continuing. How could she just brush this off like it wasn't that big of deal? She looked directly in my eyes, demanding my full attention

"You are my future. Now stop. No moping or I'm calling your brothers to come and get you. Maybe you need a bachelor party."

I know Bella enough that she would do it too and I would never live it down. But I also know when she made up her mind about something, it wasn't going to change. She had decided the first time we pledge our loves to each other, that I was her future, and nothing changed that. And her mind was made up.

"I'm sorry. I am moping ain't I? Must be the nerves." I laugh.

"Are your feet cold?" she joked.

"Not in that sense. I've been waiting a century to marry you, Miss Swan. The wedding ceremony is the one thing I can't wait –"

_Oh Eddie boy, you're not bowing out of this_

Oh shit! They found me. Not too much surprise there is only a couple of places I would have gone and most of them would have involved Bella.

"Oh, for the love of all that's holy!"

_Say your goodbyes, so much mayhem and so little time_. Jasper and Emmett had found me. They had been planning this thing for weeks, excited to finally have an excuse to have a vampire style bachelor party. After suffering through the human one I sort of owe them. Alice had warn them that I better be back in time for the ceremony.

"What wrong," Bella shout up in horror, looking at the door.

"You don't have to call my brothers. Apparently Emmett and Jasper are not going to let me bow out tonight."

Bella clutched me close for a second before releasing me. "Have fun."

Emmett had climb up onto the roof and was streaking his nails against the window. _So this is where you are half the time. Any chance in getting the boobs shirt back._

I growled as I left the bed.

"Wow, Jazz, Eddie doesn't have a shirt on. So that is what has been happen," Emmett said too low for Bella to hear.

"If you don't send Edward out, we're coming in after him!" Emmett said this time so that Bella could hear it.

_Starting the honeymoon a little early? We can wait._ That is it.

I lean down to kiss Bella Swan for the last time. "Get to sleep. You've got a big day tomorrow."

"And a longer night," Emmett snicker, to low for Bella to hear. I growled again at him.

_You need sex Edward; you're as tight as clock._

I ignored Em for a second. "That's sure to help me wind down."

"I'll meet you at the altar"

"I'll be the one in white,"

She smiled. "Very convincing," I said, springing forward out the window, knocking Em to the ground below. I had one thing over him, he couldn't read my mind.

"In a pink thong no less," Em said trying to get me off. "OH Eddie, how I wait for you take pure untouched me and my pink thong," said in the worse Bella impression that I have heard of. Thank God, he didn't say this loud enough for her to hear, or I would be down one usher.

"You'd better not make him late," Bella mummer.

"I guess she as frustrated as you are Edward," he laugh, finally wiggling his way from under me. He took off and I chased after her.

"Come back you big jerk."

****************************************Author Note***************************************************************

Just a little side note about Edward. I did a lot of research on courting riturals of the Edwardian period (that is when Edward was human). One of the things I found interesting is that during courting your intent would send you flowers. Flowers had meanings behind them. Rose actually mean false love, tulips (New Moon Cover) means true love.


	4. Chapter 3 Vampires

Rising Sun

Chapter 3 – Vampires

_Gather ye rosebuds while ye may, _

_Old Time is still a-flying: _

_And this same flower that smiles to-day _

_To-morrow will be dying._

- Robert Herrick

I chased Emmett half way to Alaska, while he made every kind of innuendo and sexual joke know to man. Jasper had caught up with us, at his own pace.

"So where are we going, Jasper," I asked as we slowed our pace to about 80 miles per hour.

"It's just a couple of miles down the road."

"There is nothing out here," said Emmett coming back. "Wait – we are a hundred miles from the nearest gas station let alone town. We aren't going to a strip joint are we?" He looked generally disappointed – like a kid who was told that Christmas was cancel.

"Trust me this is something better."

I shot Jasper a grateful look. I wasn't really looking forward to going to some cheesy bar to watch half naked girls dance to the worse music possible. I knew Jasper would come through with something more our style.

"Nope something way better," we stopped in a valley that I didn't recognized. I thought I knew most of the land between Forks and Alaska. I took a sniff of the air and breathe in … "An African Lion," I said.

"A couple of them, some Asian Tigers, a could of grizzles bears, a polar bear or two, a couple of black bears, some bob cats, a couple of wolverines and panther or two and I think I was also able to fine some cheetahs and a couple of other predators."

"Where in the hell did you find an African Lion?" Emmett said.

"Africa," Jasper said, smiling. "It is amazing what you can purchase on the black market. I was also going to get you a kimono dragon, but I figured it would be too much."

"A kimono dragon?"

"It's that reptile that chased Steve Irwin up a tree during one of the episodes of the _Crocodile Hunter's Dairie_s."

"A man after my own heart," said Em. I had to admit the smell was exciting. Some of the greatest predators were in this area just waiting for us. "You know he would have made a good vampire."

An age old argument on which famous person we would have turned into a vampire. Me it was a toss up between Kurt Cobain, Beethoven and Jimmy Hendrix.

We discussed it one of the first times that Bella, had sat at our table, with everyone. Rose was ignoring her but the rest of them were making an effort for me to be nice to her. I was a little angry with them for bring that up until Bella had piped in and said she would have turned Lord Percy, Jane Austin, Shakespeare and the man who made the sticky buns on tenth and forth. Alice said she couldn't change a normal person. And Bella told Alice if she ever tasted those buns she would see this was no normal person. I was shocked how normal it was for her to have this conversation. _I like her, can we keep her_, Emmett had said to me afterwards.

They always referred her with _our kind_, _one of us,_ or _our family_. And I found myself doing the same thing, lately.

_"Admit, it Edward, she is a vampire, just hasn't been change yet," said Emmett._

"Oh, so instead of us watching him being bitten by every single animal he encounters we can watch him bit every single animal he encounters," I said.

"Oh Crikey This beauty taste good. Crikey" Emmett said in the worse accent possible.

Jasper put his arms around our shoulders as we glazed out onto the meadow. "Well, Gentleman, I don't about you, but I ready for some hunting."

Jasper would be the one to figure out what would be exciting to the both of us. I took a whiff of the air searching for that African male lion that had caught my attention. It was my favorite but it was a rare treat for me because they were on the endanger list and very well protected. But we weren't humans. We had respect for the natural order and knew our roles of predators were that to be revere.

I took off, Emmett and Jasper laughing at me, before heading off to their game.

I was no long Edward, but a predator on the hunt for my game. I would stock him until the time and than claim him. He would surrender to my will and allow me to feast on him.

It took a little bit but I found him, He was big and strong and put up one good fight, but I was faster and stronger. His blood was that more pleasurable to me. I could feel the strength running through me as I drained him. But, there were a lot more out there that I wanted to try.

When Bella had finally cross I was planning on a trip to Africa, they had the best selection of predators and I wanted her to taste a wide palate.

It was a couple of hours later, as I lay on the ground fully filled and very happy. The stars stretched out in their blanket in the sky, thinking about another clear night when I took Bella out to our meadows to watch the stars. It was during the early days of courtship before I left her. We had snuck out of her house one night when it was clear. Laying there, her head on my stomach as I identify each of the stars and tell her about them, had been one of the most peaceful times I have known. I wonder right now if she was warm and happy in her bed, dreaming. Was she dreaming of me? Carlisle had promised to stand guard but I still didn't like the idea of her being alone. I wanted her to be sleeping in my bed tonight, but Alice had insisted that she couldn't be over there with the decorations going on.

Tanya clan was due sometime tonight anyways and Esme thought for the best that Tanya and Bella didn't met until after wedding. At least if I was around, I could protect Bella from Tanya. Or Tanya from Bella. She does have claws when she wanted to use them.

"Don't tell me you're done" Emmett said blocking out my view of the heavenly body.

"I just had three African Lions, a tiger, a bear, two cheetah and a…elephant? So I am a little full right now" I felt beyond full because I have been feeding all this week, because dealing with Bella mom had taken a lot of my patients. I knew she liked me and was excided about the wedding. But she was questioning too much in her head about me and my family.

Jasper lay down next to me, putting his hands behind his head. "I order an elephant? Funny you would think I would remember something like that." He looked full, which would be good because he offered to pick up Bella mom and step-father tomorrow.

"Well that or I just had an escapee," I said.

Emmett joined us, looking up at the stars too. He took a piece of grass and chewed it. _Sorry old habit_.

"What did it taste like," he asked, a little upset that he hadn't found the elephant.

"Like a rubber gray thing," I said, I can mark elephant off of things I wanted to try. They just didn't taste good. I guess they were too big and too slow.

"And how many rubber gray things have you eaten," Emmett said.

"So better than the stripe club," Jasper asked, pleased with himself. Jasper never sis to amazed me on what he could get, but this was the topper of his rare items finds. Our artwork, statues, sculptures and piece of furniture was because of him. Ask him to find a rare wood carving done buy a monk name Moe in the 1400s who had one eyebrow and sure enough the next day he would have located it plus have a selection to choose from.

"A hundred times better," I said. My favorite food, hunting and nobody to worry about all in one place, there wasn't anything else I could think to have here, except Bella and to be alone and me not having to worry about killing her. But that was in due time. "Couldn't ask for anything more for a bachelor party."

"Yah, I'll agree too," said Emmett. I knew that Jasper ordered those bears to keep Emmett happy. "Rose is ten times hotter than any of those weak humans."

We laid their in silence for a while staring up at the stars. I knew it was now or never to ask the question.

"What is it like," I asked.

"What is what like," Jasper said. Emmett was too busy making pictures in his mind with the stars.

'I think he means sex, Jazz," said Em. Stop from making the Polaris into a bunny in his mind.

"Yah," I said for the first time thankful I couldn't blush. "Was your wedding night your first time."

"Alice's or mine no. I was her first though." Jasper said. Jasper was from the south and had been taught not to talk about these things, so I was surprised that he was opening up for me. He never showed affection in public; that would be dishonorable to the lady. I very rarely saw them do any thing else in public except hold hands. But you could tell they were together, something about the feelings that they illuminated and how they look at each other. Bella told me once she felt like she was approaching on a private moment at times. I guess he felt I really need honesty.

"I lost my virginity when I was sixteen during the war to a camp follower. And I was Maria lover for the longest time. Than Alice."

"Do you remember your first time?"

"Not really. I guess it wasn't one of my more memorable times. Most guys it isn't. I wasn't in love; I just thought that you couldn't be a man and a virgin at the same time. I do remember being nervous, though."

"And with Maria."

"It was just sex Edward, something we did. There were no feelings involved. Yes there was pleasure, but given the choice between drinking blood and having sex with Maria – I would have chosen the blood."

He stopped for a moment and I could see his mind was working. His love for Alice was a deep thing; she had pulled him forcefully from the pits of hell. She fought for him, and unworthy he thought of himself in his mind, he loved Alice beyond his own reasoning. He once accused me of not understand how deeply you could be in love with someone, but maybe at that point I wasn't about to admit to it. Now I understood perfectly.

When he first came to this family, he had been very hesitating about it. Alice had reinsured him that he was supposed to be here, she had foresight it. He did leave her for a month's time, after he fallen. He returned and Emmett beat him to a pulp for what he did to Alice. But Alice opened her arms back for him. Ever since than he has struggled to be part of this lifestyle and he felt that he was starting to fit in. In his mind, Em and I were his brothers. Took him long enough.

"Alice was different. I don't know how to explain it, but you know when that change comes over, and you feel your whole life switch before your eyes. All of sudden life takes on new meaning."

I nodded. The first time Bella had whispered my name, begging me to stay in her dreams I had felt the change. It had knocked me off my feet.

"Sex became making love – and making love is one of the greatest pleasures you will ever indulge in – almost as great as drinking the blood of your singer."

"I was about fifteen, some girl I knew," Emmett said. "She had one of those representations. I don't remember much of it either, just how weird it was. She did most of the work." He laughed. "I don't think I was her first."

He stopped and his mood became more serious. Emmett had a very serious side that didn't show itself too often. "You know the circumstances around Rose. I could kill that bastor, not only had he damaged her physically but her mentally. He twisted what sex was into a sick preverbal thing. It took her a while before she was comfortable with me when we made love. She always took a shower afterwards."

Rose had been more damage than we thought. Her body healed but her mind didn't. She wouldn't allow any of us to touch her, which I think is one of the reasons why Carlisle turned his head when she went after Royce and his buddies. She needed to face that monster herself before she could heal.

Carlisle told me that when the mind has been traumatized the way her had – it wouldn't heal. Even after almost seventy years of marriage, Esme still cringed if Carlisle raises his voice even if it isn't at her. And she knows he would never hurt her, so I can only guess what Rose went through.

"It took her a whole decade to believe what we were doing wasn't dirty and she wasn't ruin. That I could love her and saw her whole; that she wasn't damage material. Rose has change. She realized that she can be valued as a being and not for her looks," Em really talked about the problems in his relationship. But I have seen the doubts in both of their mines. They were still working through some of their problems.

"I am scared," I said finally voicing my feelings. "What happens if I hurt her?"

Jasper turned his head and look at me strangely. "How far have you been with Bella,"

"We sort of been experiment, I guess in human turns we started round third base?"

"And no problems," Jasper asked.

"Other than her passing out," I said. "It not like you guys, you know there has been complications, she still very fragile. I can't do what I want with her, so that is driving me up the wall. I feel all this tension at time,"

"You haven't been feeling it lately?"

"Well we figured out a why around it. Is it possible to have sex with out being inside someone and there are clothing blocking you?"

"Oh my god…you dry hump Bella," Emmett burst out laughing. I wanted to hit him. I never bothered blocking his mind, because he always said what he thought. He was that type of guy – very open. He said it was from coming from a large family where you had to let yourself be known if you wanted any attention.

"Dry hump?" Jasper said. I guess he never heard the words either.

"Sorry, guys' locker room," Emmett said. This time around in school had been in eye opening in America teen culture. The last time we went to high school was way before the sexual revolution. There a couple of times that we stood in gasp as we heard what people were saying and doing. Poor Jasper, his first taste of American youth culture has been a failure and his second had almost driven the poor guy insane. He told us straight out that he was done. That he felt enough. For a guy who was over sensitive to emotions – high school was hell.

"Edward there is a lot more to sex than the intercourse," Jasper said. "You too share a special bond and she's still walking. So you are going to be okay."

"She passes out, a lot," I said. It started with the second time we kissed and it kept going from there. She would just stop breathing and it wouldn't be so bad if she didn't laugh about it.

"Wow, Edward, you must have really pleased her, I would be strutting around if it was Rose," Emmett said. Vampires don't pass out.

"But I can't keep doing that…She wants the real thing and so do I."

"What you are feeling is normal and healthy. You should be at the point of your relationship either doing it or working your way to it. I surprised you waited this long. I thought the first day you brought her to the house – when you were up in your room. You were either having sex or drinking her blood. You were emitting strong vibes."

"Okay, how do I do it," I said. "I know the mechanics of it Emmett so I don't need a lecture." I could see Emmett mind start using poor Rose as the example. I held two medial degrees, plus been through sex Ed more times than I needed. "How do I make sure she gets pleasure out of it? How do I control myself when she makes that smell?"

"The smell – it isn't Bella usual smell but ten times more potentiate?"

"Yes."

They started laughing which didn't help me. What was I missing?

"That's a good thing Edward; it just means that she is sexually aroused by you. She is giving you the okay to take her."

"Damn, Rose's drive me up the wall." Emmett said, thinking again of Rose. I really wanted to block that out. Thank heavens that both Jasper and Carlisle were better at controlling that side of their relationship.

"As for her pleasure, each woman is different. You are just going to have to learn."

"Rose loves it when I suck her ears, drives her wild."

"Thanks for the visual," I said. I am not going to be able to look at Rose again in the same way.

"And Alice's breast drives her wild. Bella could be a different place, part of the fun is the discovery them and than the different ways you can use that place," Jasper said. As much as I didn't want to think about Alice and him, he got me curious about Bella's places that she enjoy. I know she liked it when I fondle her breast and kissed along her jaw line and throat. But was their one place above anywhere else?

"Take the first time slow," Emmett said getting over his fantasy with Rose. "There is no rush. Enjoy it. And don't worry it's natural to be nervous."

"Don't be afraid to speak about what you want to do. Some things will work and others wouldn't. Be experimental," Jasper said.

"Cuddle afterwards. Women like to feel like they are wanted. That you see them more than an object for pleasure"

"Allow her once in while to be in charge, nothing sexier than a dominating woman, it shows that they are comfortable with you and trust you."

"There is a lot to remember," I said, trying to store all the information on at once.

"And you are going to forget it in the heat of the moment," Emmett were quiet for a while looking up at the stairs.

Song were written about, words were spoken about it. Was I ready?

In our relationship we had faced things that not many normal couples had. We had been tested and tried, had to walk through the fire. I love her more than I love myself. In that love I have made mistakes. I understood why Jasper left Alice after he succumb to the weakness and killed that human or why Emmett almost left Rose when he thought he was causing her more pain. I understood Carlisle's hesitating and Esme not trusting herself to be enough. I understood what it was like to love someone so much that you tremble in side.

I also know what it was like to be love beyond that understanding. To be love unconditional and passionate. To lay each night in your lovers arms and know you are wanted by her side. That you will be the only one she says yes to.

I wanted to make love to her. I want to share myself in a way that I never did before. I wanted to take her body and soul and claim it for my own. I knew I was being selfish – as selfish as wanting her to be changed. I wanted to be inside her and feel that passion and rush. The things songs and books talk about.

There was no going back. Carlisle had accused me of running away and I knew I couldn't this time. Her pull toward herself was unbreakable and I was walking into the fire.

Emmett laughing stopped me.

"What so funny."

"I was thinking of Lion King, you know that part where Simba, Timon, Pumbaa were laying under the starts and Pumbaa said that they were big gas bubbles in the sky that were popping, and the other two laugh."

"Yah, so" What can I say, we are Disney fans.

"Well, if you really read what a star is, they are planets with a lot of gas. So Pumbaa was right. And I was thinking you know what I miss about being human."

"What"

"Farting, nothing clears your mind better than a good Fart,"

Jasper and I groan.

"You know who would make a good vampire, Walt Disney. I bet Disney movies weren't have become as bad as they did if he was still around."

"Oh, yah so instead of making kids happy; he could eat them,"

A couple of hours later we finished off the rest of Jasper's surprised. Fill and satisfied we head back home in a normal pace.

"Today is it," Em said.

"Yep," I said.

"Nervous."

What was there to be nervous about, I was marring the most amazing girl in the world. "Not really, just can't wait."

"You know this is bigger than my wedding," he said.

"Which one?"

Emmett had been married over six times –Rose liked to play bride. He put up with a lot with her, but he kept telling me it was well worth it. I had my doubts.

"Well look on the bright side if you mess this one up you can always have another wedding ceremony," he said.

No, this was the only one I needed. Like Jasper, Carlisle – once was enough. I know that Alice and Jasper take off ever ten years to renew their vowels. Last time it was in Vegas with an Elvis impersonator, but it was more for fun than anything meaningful like a wedding.

"Well as your big brother," Emmett started

"Actually Jasper would be my big brother, I am at least twenty years older than you," I said.

"I feel it is my duty to give you a piece of advice."

I turned to Jasper, "Help me," I pleaded. Emmett was in one of his moods and I wasn't going to get out what brotherly advice he was going on.

_You're on your own_

"In every marriage there is something that it also an absolute truth…" pausing for dramatic effect. "Enjoy being right, because the minuet you say I do, you stop being right."

**********************************************Author Notes*******************************************************

I just wanted to thank all those who choose Rising Sun as one of their favorites. Please reviews, I like to know what other's are thinking.


	5. Chapter 4 Wedding

Rising Sun

Chapter 4 – Wedding

_How do I love thee? Let me count the ways._

_I love thee to the depth and breadth and height_

_My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight_

- Elizabeth Barrett Browning

Dawn had broken it first light by the time we made it to the county line. We still had another ten minuets before we would reach home.

I was wondering if Bella was waking up, the flowers would have been delivered by now. Was she opening her eyes to them? Had she had a good night?

I was tempting to call her, but I had promise Alice and my brothers I would allow her to sleep. Alice was due at her house an hour and I could see her stumbling down stairs in pajamas. It was a comforting sight that I watched from her windows many of times before heading off to pick up my car. It seemed that I just couldn't get enough time with her.

Soon I thought; I would have her mornings, afternoon, evenings and nights.

"Too bad Carlisle didn't come with us," Em said breaking the silence. After living with each other more then a century, we don't find talking necessary. "He would have liked the elephant."

"I still don't remember ordering the elephant," Jasper said.

"It could have been an escapee," I said. Jasper pride himself on being organized and having an elephant slip through him bother him.

"Was it African or Asian?"

"What's the different," I asked.

"Ears are bigger on an African while an Asian is rounder. The skin is also smoother. African males have tusk, which Asian's don't," Em said.

We both looked at him stun, since when was he the animal expert. "Animal Planet," Em shrugged.

"How can you watch that without getting thirsty," Jasper asked.

"Same way human's and now Edward watch the Food Network. Plus I like to know what I am eating, makes me feel all healthy."

"I only watch the Food Network because of Bella," I said in defense. I will have to admit that _Good Eats_ was interesting – since it was easier to understand how to cook when you put it in scientific terms. Charlie wasn't too thrilled with me so I lost my one and only food taster. "Emerald would be a good vampire."

"He would want to have the blood kicked up a notched."

We walked into the clearing, the back lawn stretching before us. All around were humans, much like tiny ants, hasting going to and fro as the lawn was being transformed.

"I thought you told Alice not to go overboard," Jasper whispered to me as we finally reached home. The south lawn was littered with white tents. Towards the scoop the workers were putting a dance floor together. The caterers had arrived early and had been setting up for our human guest. The stanched of well made human food filled the air. I saw Gus working with his two grandsons putting the flower arrangements on the table.

"This is bigger than my wedding," Em said whistling. We never had big weddings before, mostly because it was the family and maybe a couple of people from the hospital. We tried to socialize very little with the outside world because of two things, people were still our natural food and two the closer you get to the person, the more they notice your oddities.

"Which one?" Jasper asked.

"All of them, put together," Em said.

"Bella human, we couldn't leave out the human part."

"But she invited the whole town it seems like – and part of La Push," I said. Charlie was the town sheriff and had grown up in this town – along with Bella mother. Even both of them had been only children; there were still a lot of folks that they both knew. When we sent out the invitations, we had also send them out to our friends too – with the warning that their will be humans at this things; and they weren't on the menu. Most of them declined, saying they will come by later - when Bella wasn't human to pay their respects. The only other ones were coming were the Denalis clan – all except Irina. After the La Push wolves killed Laurent, she refused to have anything to do with us.

Kate and Tanya had apologies for her absents – saying that she need time to morn and heal. Kate had been truly excited about the wedding but Tanya had a couple of choice words for me – mostly like Rose she believed it was insulting that I found a human more beautiful than her. Childish really.

Esme had been directing traffic for most of the morning; as Alice prepared the bride. "How was it," she asked as we approached.

"Great, Carlisle should have come," Em said. He started speaking faster so the humans who were busy around us couldn't understand. "We even had an elephant."

"Is Bella here," I tried to pick up her scent. After a couple of seconds I locked on the faint smell that almost bowls me over every time. She was here; having walking through the front door an hour ago.

"Yes, Alice is in the mist of torturing her," Esme said. "We need more plants over there," she said to a human as they were unloading a couple of fake trees with lights."

I felt at easy, knowing she was safe were I could protect her. I never felt right when she was away from me. Anxious was too light of a term to use for those times.

"The Denalis clan arrived about an hour ago, they are down in the guest cottage," Esme said. "I believe they are going to do a short hunting trip before the wedding, just to be on the safe side."

The Denalis had developed this life style independent of ours. We just happened to met them by chance and formed an attachment. Both Esme and Carlisle had hope I would build more of an attachment to one of the three females. They were nice but for some reason they didn't strike me as anything but nice. It wasn't until a year ago that I had been knocked off my axis by a pale skin, brown hair beauty.

"Don't worry, I told them you wouldn't be available to after the wedding, and if they had a problem with that they needed to take it up with Alice," said Esme.

Alice can be scary when she wanted to be.

"Thanks," I said.

"I need you to do a couple of things before you go get change, she said handing us a list. Jasper, don't forget you need to go pick up Bella's mom and stepfather at one.

Em looked at the list, "There is such thing a as a chocolate fountain?"

It took the rest of the morning for us to finish up with Esme list. Between moving tables, setting up the stage and moving chairs I had little time to think. About noon – Jasper headed upstairs to get ready before heading to Port Angles to pick up Renee and Philip. I had two hours to spear before I had to start about getting ready and as much as wanted to see Bella, I didn't feel like handling the wrath of Alice.

I had been ordered to stay away from the east side of the house, and I wasn't allowed into the great room so playing piano was out of the question. My room was also off limits because it was in the mist of being moved. Esme as a wedding/birthday gift for Bella was building her a house. She had learned from Rose and Em for everyone sanity – kick the newly weds outs. Unfortunate my room was now in the mist of being redone into another study – this one was for Rose.

"There you are Edward," Rose said coming up to me. She was already dressed, looking as beautiful as ever. I am surprised that she was putting on such a good show right now. I figured we would have to do with one of her fits. _Carlisle wants to see you_.

"Thanks, and you look beautiful," I said. She smiled and hurried away to see Em. She was a little shocked, but she deserved the compliment. We never had a smooth relationship and the whole thing with Bella seemed to drive the wedge deeper. But throughout the planning she hasn't said one thing – even made a couple of suggestions.

Maybe Em was right, I just needed to allow Rose and Bella to find something on there own terms.

I walked across the house until I reached Carlisle study. _ Come in Edward_ he said without me knocking.

Most of the house seemed to resemble our history together as a family but in here it mostly about Carlisle. His paintings, his pictures, his books – even his desk. There weren't any diplomas – even though Jasper had made forgeries from different University. Carlisle said they always made him feel fake, even though he does carry more than one degree.

_I take it you had a fun time_

"You should have come, I had an elephant," I said. I watched him go through his safe and pulled out a black velvet box. "Bella's," I asked. I knew what was already in there. Carlisle had presented each of us with one of them when we became part of this family. Jasper, Em and I wore ours on an armband. Rose around her neck, Esme on her wrist, and Alice on a ribbon. Carlisle wore his on his finger, as his wedding band. It was the family crest of arms. Carlisle had designed it to represent three things – strength, compassion and loyalty. Strength in the face of temptation, compassion for those who were weak and loyalty to our family. Bella was going to receive hers tonight as a gestured of welcome to the family; even though she was family in most of our eyes the first time she walked through the door.

She once asked me about it; one of the first times she had spent time over here.

"I never seen something like it," she said studying it. We had been up in my room sitting on the couch when she asked me about. She had noticed Alice and Jasper's. I had explained the story to her as she traced it. It was the only time I noticed her eyeing a piece of jewelry.

_Yes, I ordered it back when you too were just staring to date. I figured it takes them a good amount of time to create the arms, so I wanted to be ready. I figured a bracelet because I noticed she wears them a lot._

He opened the box to show me the double sliver band with the family crest on it, much like Esme. The band was smaller to compensate for her tiny wrist.

"How did you know that this day was to come, Alice couldn't even tell if this would happened."

_When you live as long as I have, you learn the tell- all signs. I knew the day that you brought her here for the first time; I wasn't welcoming a guest but my newest daughter._

Bella first time here was a shock to everyone. I knew that they held their breaths hoping that she wouldn't go running from here, that this was the ultimate acceptance of what I was; my family. To our utter astonishment, she not only didn't run, but she took the first step forward to greet them. She accepted us for what we were, loved us and wasn't afraid of us. She once told me that she knew that she belong here the first time she had seen this place and dreamed of the day that she could be part of it. I don't think that dream included a white dress.

"I had a long talk about the whole sex thing with Em and Jasper," I said. A couple of weeks ago, I had talked to Carlisle about it. He had reassured me that I could have a normal relationship with Bella while she was human. He had faith in me that I could handle this.

_I hope they didn't scary you too much._

"The complete opposite, they actually took my concern seriously. I am not too sure what to expect though."

_It's a hard thing to describe Edward. But you will understand why soon. I have faith in you son, and so does everyone else including Bella. _

I shrugged my shoulders, not sure I deserved that faith. So far I hadn't messed up too bad – Bella was still alive. Mess up, yes a lot. More time than I thought I should be forgiven for.

_Well I didn't ask you in here to talk about that. I wanted to give you some words of wisdom that I have given Emmett and Jasper on their big days. Marriage is the end of the journey, but the beginning of a new one. Each step you take, learn to take them together as equal. My father once said something to me that has always stuck._

Carlisle didn't usually talk about his father in good manners. From what I knew he was cruel hard man who was obsessed with religion. Carlisle had been training to take his place when he was turned. But what I found odd, that even though his father forced religion down his throat – Carlisle was still very religious. He prayed right before surgery and read the Bible. Most of us found it kind of strange that he would hold on to a religion that rejected us the damn.

_He told me that wedding was an equal union, that each player had its part in that union. When God decided to give Adam a companion, he didn't choice a take a bone from the foot so that he could walk over her, or a bone from the hand so that she could do his work or a bone from the head so she could be above him, but a rib. So that she could walk beside him. Remember that Edward. Bella is your equal and even though her role in this marriage will be different than your, she is to always besides you._

Carlisle words had a way of echoing in my mind. As long as I known him he always seemed to see things beyond what they should be. I have stride to be like him in every way. His compassion, his honesty and his strength had been what kept this family together for the longest time and held us together through the bad times.

We were odd balls of the vampire world. There wasn't a coven like ours – seven mature vampires – three mating couples that lived together, soon to be eight vampires and four mating couples. But Carlisle had proven that this life style was capable, that we could rise above what faith brought us to live somewhat normal lives. We each had a lot to thank him for. He had been the guiding light through our darkness.

And as much as I would have admitted I hated being a vampire, it did bring me one of the greatest joys. It allowed me a chance to wait for my soul mate.

It took me a while to realize that Bella had been created for me, that my destiny was to find and love her. Born almost a hundred years apart, there would have been no way for us to have met other than this way.

She was everything I could hope and more.

I opened the door to Carlisle and Esme room. Alice had decided that their suite far away from the activities our house that the men could get ready in.

I had never really been in here; this place seemed always forbidden to the rest our family. Em had jokingly called it the forbidden corridor. But even he would never venture into place. We respected Carlisle too much. He once tried to get Esme to spill what was really up here. She tried to explain to that boy's wild imagination that there was nothing very exciding up here, a bed, a couple of dresses, two night stands, books, some pieces of art and other things. Em still refuses to believe that.

"Never thought I would live to see the day that I would be allow in here, even take a shower," Jasper said walking out of the bathroom. He had a towel around his waist and was drying off his hair. He had to be out of here, fully dressed in lest than 15 minuets. "Man that's a hug bathroom."

"So I guess I am not the only one kicked out of his room," I said. I figured at least Jasper would be allowed to get to change in his room, since he was Alice favorite.

"Your room doesn't exist anymore," Jasper said. "It is now in the cottage."

"Actually my stuff is down in the garage. Why is it when we get a new family member my stuff always in up the garage."

Jasper laughed. The last time had been when he and Alice had shown up. "This one is entirely your fault, but you'll thank her in the end."

Jasper walked over to the bed and grabbed his tuxedo. I walked around the room trying to take in as much stuff as possible. Who knows when the next time I will be allowed up here. On the far wall was a short bookcase running the length of it. The windows behind it looked out onto the river and the grounds. Sitting on the window still was a bunch of pictures. The time seemed to span from my first car, Esme and Carlisle wedding, Rose and Em wedding, Jasper and Alice wedding, graduation pictures, pictures of us hanging out or going on vacation. Where the house seemed to reflect the family on a personal note, this seemed to reflect us as a unit. There was one picture that caught my eyes.

"Hard to believe that was only taken a year ago, so glad that you talked me out of killing her," Jasper said leaning over my shoulder.

It was the picture of Bella and me at the prom. She was wearing her walking cast but other than that we looked like a normal teenager. I had insisted on the pictures, which I am glad I did. We looked happy, like the world was at right.

I had the same picture in my room and I carried one in my wallet, along with a lock of her hair.

Life would have been more different if I hadn't choice to come back. Would the story end as it did for Esme and Carlisle – only after a major tragedy and nothing else to live for would I have founded her again?

I made the right choice coming back.

"Jasper Jackson Whitlock Cullen! What are you still doing here," Esme shouted as she came walking into the room. Both of us quickly turned from the bookcase, guilty as if we got our hands in the cookie jar. "Sorry," we both said in union. Esme was younger than Jasper, but if Carlisle was the patriarch of the family, she was definitely the matriarch. She was definitely our mother, loving, encouraging and some times strict with us.

"You're due at the hotel in an hour and your not even dress yet."

"Sorry, mama," he muttered.

"Honestly, what am I going to do with you? Go on get your pants on."

Jasper disappeared into the bathroom.

"What do you got in your hand, Edward," she asked.

I held out the picture to show her, feeling guilty.

She smiled taking the picture and running her hand along the edge gently. "They are my most prized positions," she said, replacing the picture in it spot. "I know it silly, it's not like you don't look the same as you did when I first met you. But these all represent joyous times in my life."

I looked across the pictures. "Do you remember this one," she said holding up a picture. It was a picture of Emmett and me on top of the roof. Esme had just gotten the Brownie and was dieing to try it out. We had been arguing over how to put the shingles on the roof – I thought I knew how because I had read a book and Emmett was trying to tell me that he has done it before and knew how to do it better. We end up getting into a wrestling match up there and fell through the roof landing on poor Carlisle.

"Yah, you were pretty upset with us. You chased us into the woods, yelling at the top of your lungs and throwing shingles at us. Carlisle and Rose were on the porch laughing at the whole thing."

Jasper walked out the bathroom with his pants and shirt on. The tuxedo had been design to look like those from the Edwardian area. I had a feeling Alice had one of her themes going on, but dared not to ask. "You look very handsome, Jazz," Esme said.

"Thank you, mama," he said quietly and held out the bow tie in his hand. She smiled and starting to tie it.

"Hey here are you with the robot," I said picking up another candid one. This one had Jasper lying across the floor his eyes crossed in concentration as he put "Max" together.

We still had Max; he just has been upgrade a million times. And not only could he serve drinks, but fetch the mail, do the taxes and the _Macarena_.

"We couldn't get you to move from that spot for almost three days. Alice was about ready to kill Em."

He chuckle. "I love that robot."

"Here you go," Esme said taking a step back to look at her work. She smiled. "Don't forget to turn on the air condition on the way back, it will dilute the smell."

"Don't worry, I got this one," he said bouncing out the door.

I was amazed when Jasper volunteered to pick Bella mom and stepfather up. He felt up to the challenged.

"I am used to Bella smell by now, I can handle it," he said.

Alice didn't see any incidents so I was confident that he could do it. He had been growing more and more boulder since high school. Maybe making it through had proven to him that he could handle it.

"Good luck, man," I said.

"Now you mister need to get into the shower. The ceremony starts in two hours and you haven't even begun to get ready."

"Okay I am going," I laughed as I headed into the bathroom. In a couple of minuets I lost myself in the hot water. In less than two hours Bella would be official mine, something I have waited for almost a century for.

Was I nervous? Yes, I was. I had lived for better part of my existence with perfectly matched couples. I knew that marriage was a work in progress. They still had their troubles, but I have noticed that they were able to work through it. Things I used to think was the most idiotic arguments possible, I was now understood why they were happening. I now also understood why they would take off for a couple of days here and there.

Like Bella and I had. The last couple of weeks had been a blessing. We had work through so much than, our uncertainties, our mistakes and regrets. We learned how to talk as a couple.

Was I ready for this? Yes, I was. I was ready to finally be joined with her. To always have her by my side, even if it meant the vampire part too. I was fully ready to turn her when it was time. I had learned to accept that this had to be her decision, and she was making the correct on. During the last couple of weeks, I have be adjusting myself with that idea and finding it more to my liking. She would be like me in almost every way, I would not lose her to death, but gain her through an eternity of life.

As Emmett once pointed out – if there was ever a need for a human to become one of us for her own protection, it was her.

But finally I convinced myself that what I was doing was okay. She had made the decision on her own. She had been presented with the other possibilities with the dog, but even though she admitted she was scared, she was ready. She understood what this lifestyle meant. It would be a step that she couldn't look back.

She told me as much as she missed her parents and some of her friends, she never felt right about being in their world. She always had been more comfortable with mine and preferred it. The stress of last month had finally ware off and she was back to the more comfortable side of herself. She wanted to be part of this world, of my world.

And mine she would become of. I only hope a hundred years later I could make her happy. I smiled at the possibilities – there was so much of the world I was waiting to explore with her.

What would it be like to finally hunt with her? I know my brothers would prefer to go hunting with their mates. I never understood why. Another Jasper's ask me in fifty years answer.

I couldn't quiet picture it – but I was still looking forward to that day.

"Hey lover boy, stop hogging all the hot water," yelled Emmett pounding on the door.

*****************************AUTHOR'S NOTE***************************

Even though the family crest was in the movies and not in the book, I thought it was a cool idea and decided to add it to the story.

As for Jasper, for some strange reason, I see him a little more on the techno geek side than the other Cullens. Mostly because computers probably would be easier to handle than human's or vampires.

For all those who added me to their favorite stories or review thank you very much, you don't know how much it warms my heart to open my email and see five or six people had added me to their favorites. Keep up the love, and please, please review. I like to see input.


	6. Chapter 5 A million Year

Rising Sun

Chapter 5 – A Million Years

_The best is yet to be_

_The last of life for which_

_The first was made._

_- Robert Browning_

"You owe me big time for that," Jasper said as Emmett, Carlisle and I finally descended from the second floor. We were dressed and waiting for Esme to come down stairs. "Why didn't you warn me that her mother was the complete opposite of her?"

I knew Renee could be a handful, just by watching Bella having to deal with her, but I didn't figure in that she wouldn't be emotional overload today. Maybe it wasn't a good idea to send the most emotional sensitive vampire.

Jasper eyes were wide and he kept shaking his head, as if to get whatever feeling he had out of there.

Renee was very childlike – reminding me more of a toddler's mind than a grown up's. Her mind went from one thing to another in a matter of minuets, never quiet content on the here and now. Bella maturity had to do mostly with her immaturity.

Philip was hard enough to swallow. He had be a big man on campus during his high school and college years, but failed to produce anything in his pro years. He still is trying to live those glory days, even after they had past him by. I can honest see why Bella wanted out of that household at the first chance she got. I never spent much time with Philip when we went to Florida. His high school team had made the states playoff, but last Monday, had been enough to reconfirm my dislike of him. My other bachelor party was something that would go down in a lot of bunt jokes. Philip had insisted on one, he was thinking stripers and lots of alcohol – so Jasper came up with a solution.

The Settle Seahawks were playing a preseason game that night, so we went to see them. We had taken a charted helicopter to our box seats (Emmett was a big football fan, so any where we ended up, he usually purchased a corporate box). Along with Philip, we ended up inviting Carlisle, Charlie, Billy Black, Seth Clearwater, Ben, Tyler and Mike (Mike was out of respect for Bella; personally I wouldn't have wanted him along). Philip got drunk and started asking me what I saw in a mouse like Bella when her mother was way hotter. Mike agreed, and I almost punch both of them. Ben, Seth and Em spent most of the game arguing who was the greater superhero, Batman, Superman or Spiderman. Jasper had completely forgotten to hunt, spent most of the game fitting with his other half. Personally I wouldn't have held a gauge if he killed either Phil or Mike, but I knew Bella would be upset. It wasn't the most pleasant evenings.

"Sorry," I said. "But hey at least you made it back in one piece."

"I don't know if he worse drunk or sober," Jasper said. "Please tell me you two are going to fake a death soon, because I was almost ready to break his neck."

I shook my head. I can see why Bella desperate want to be part of this family. Our family seemed quiet and tame next to mom and step-father. At least we act the ages we were suppose to be.

"Good you're finally dressed," said Esme, walking down the stairs. "Rose has started to play, so after this piece you need to go stand by the altar. Charlie, you're here good, Good day to you Mr. Weber. Carlisle, please show the good man where he suppose to be standing. Where are the boutonnieres?"

"Esme dear, there in your hand," Carlisle said pointing to the flowers. _Jasper isn't the only one dealing with a stress out wife. Word to the wise, no more weddings._

I tried not to laugh, mostly because I was afraid that Esme would whack me with the flowers. "Em, put these on your brother and Charlie. Hey, you there, make sure the guest are seated in their proper place."

All of us back up from Emmett, including Charlie. Em looked dumb founded at the flowers.

"Oh do I have to do everything myself. Charlie, come here."

Charlie looked more relieved that Esme was going to pin the flowers to him.

"You better go," whispered Carlisle to Charlie, "I know what she is like when she is like this, and it isn't pretty."

As soon as Charlie was pinned, she shoed him upstairs and quickly pinned the rest of us.

Carlisle and I walked to the front of the aisle, where the altar was. Alice went a little overboard with the flowers, candles and fabric but I wasn't going to say anything. My brothers, especially Emmett, were having fun showing people to their seats, most of them were very nervous. The seats were slowing starting to fill up, most of the people were not paying any attention to me. I did catch the eye of Kate who waved at me. Tanya looked ready to throw something at me.

"Got the rings," I whispered.

_Don't you start too. They are right here._ Carlisle patted his pocket.

The music changed as Emmett escorted Renee and Jasper escorted Esme down the aisle. Wonder how Jasper was able to get Emmett to change with him. Both ladies approached the altar and lit the united candle.

_I am so happy for you today_. Esme said, looking like she really wanted to cry. Renee was.

The music change and every turned towards the staircase. I turned to look up the aisle as Alice descended from the staircase and entered the great room. In her mind she was reciting _The Charge of the Light Brigade_ in Japanese. She used this trick when she wanted to keep me out of her mind. I wasn't really searching. I wanted to see the real thing with my own eyes.

She got to end of the aisle and Carlisle, who was my best man, took a step down to escort her up to the alter. Couldn't they hurry it up?

The music slowed down to Clair de Luna, a personal favorite of both ours. I was dead set against the bridal march, to me it sound like you were walking into a funeral.

She was just coming down the staircase, Charlie at her side. Her head was bent, over the veil. I took a deep breath; it seemed at the same time as she did. When she reached the bottom of the stairs, her head rose up and for a moment I could see her eyes searching for something.

Until they stopped on me, they were searching for me.

The first time I watched her sleep I thought she was the most beautiful creature, than came prom and realized how much more beautiful she really was. But this moment, she was beyond any words that I could sum up. I would never forget that moment, when our eyes met. She smiled at me, her checks turning the same blush color, defused a little by the veil.

I could feel myself break into smile that would rival the Cheshire Cat.

Her eyes were alive and sparkling as they joined with mine. Her skin was glowing and slightly flushed with the blush that I loved so much. The dress seemed to flow off her like water and even through the veil; I could see the features that I loved so much heighten.

She was beyond words. An angle, my angle, sent to save me.

It took everything I had not to race down the aisle, scoop her up and run back. I really should have picked a faster song. Or at least one that they could keep the beat to – both of them were way off the marker. But I couldn't care, all I wanted was this waiting to end, for her to be next to me and the world set right.

Bella finally reached the end. Rose had changed the rhythm twice to correct her.

_She better have a better sense of rhythm in her next life._

I stepped down and held out my hand as Charlie took it to join hers with mine. Her skin touched mine and world finally started to spin right. I would never have to let her go.

I threaded it with mine as we took our places at the alter, turning to face each other.

We decided on traditional vows, for the sake of Bella. She was afraid that she would get too nervous to remember the ones we wrote. We did change one thing. Since we both soon wouldn't be able to die, we changed the "death do us part" to "as long as we both shall live."

The minister asked for the rings to bless. Carlisle handed them to me. One was my mother's wedding ring, which would share a place on the same finger as the engagement ring, and the other was my band. He blessed these rings, and we slid them on each other fingers.

At that point I noticed that she was crying and before I could say or do anything I heard Jasper thoughts.

_She is just crying because she is overwhelmed with happiness. Human's do that occasional_.

I wanted to laugh, take her in my arms and wipe her tears away but I knew I couldn't, so I just smiled at her, which made her cry even more.

_Good going._

I didn't care, she was happy to be here and I was happy that she was happy.

Than came the part of swearing to love, honor and cherish her and I almost shouted I do as loud as I could.

Than Mr. Weber turned to the crowd "By the power vested in me by God above and the State of Washington. I hear by declare you husband and wife. What God has blessed and joined together, no man or creature (another one of our ad on, which thankfully he didn't ask about) should ever asunder."

Than he took a step back, "You may kiss your bride."

For a moment I just stood there. She was my bride, my wife. I was finally hers and she was finally mine, joined by the blessings of God.

I reached out and removed the veil, a symbol showing that she was no longer to be hidden from me. I carefully cradle her face and took a moment to stare into her eyes. Her tears were still flowering, making her eyes more alive than I ever seen them. She never looked so happy before.

Leaning forward, I softly pressed my lips on hers. Most of the time I bring her to my lips, but today she was willing to met mine head on. She stretched as I bent down. Our first act of us being equals. She threw her arms around me, hitting me with the bouquet. But I couldn't care less. I was for the first time kissing my wife.

I was kissing my wife for the first time.

I forgot the crowd, the wedding and time itself, only remembering that she loved me, that she wanted me, that I was hers.

The kiss continued, this had to be our best kiss yet and I didn't want it to end.

_Come on Edward, we still have a reception that I have spent the last month planning, don't ruin it for me now, _Alice screamed in her head.

_You do realize she has to breathe at some point_, Jasper chuckled inside his brain.

_Two more minutes and I win the bet,_ Em laughed.

_Oh come on, this is getting discussing, save it for the honeymoon, _Rose of course.

_I am so happy, I wish I could cry right now, _Esme signed choked up with joy.

_I'll break them apart in a couple of minutes_ Carlisle thought.

I had to break the kiss, mostly because she needed to breathe. I could see myself smirking in her eyes as I pulled away. I felt so alive at that moment. She was mine, all mine.

"Ladies and Gentleman, may I present to you, the new Mr. and Mrs. Edward Cullen."

We turned to face the audience, when did they get here? Most of them were standing up and clapping. Renee was blowing her nose and Seth was giving me the thumbs up. I had to laugh at that young werewolf enthusiastic. He had been the only one to show up – not that I was too surprised. The new treaty was still young; it might take them longer to trust us than we would be here. But after Seth and I had fought side by side against Victoria and Riley we seemed to formed a new sense of kinship. I hoped one day, for Bella sake, that the rest of the pack would follow his example.

Bella had disappeared among the many hugs of the crowd.

Carlisle patted me on the back, "You picked well, my son."

"I am not sure if I had a choice in the picking, but I am not complaining," I said. I never felt this happy before. Not when Bella had accepted me for being a vampire, not when she slammed into me in Italy after I thought she was dead, not when she agreed to be my wife or when she chose me. Or the hundreds of times she had lay in my arms, while she was sleeping.

It took me a couple of minutes before I could claim my bride back. I like the sound of that, my bride. She had been past around the room, from one exciting person to another. As we stood getting the pictures taken she asked me if I knew who half these people were.

"Nope, I think Alice invited half the town," I chuckled.

The wedding flowed into the reception party, flawlessly – which from Alice I didn't expect anything less. By the time we were able to head outside, twilight had settle over the river. The band that I had scouted out and hired started to play a soft tune, as the appetizer flow. People were slowly making their way out here, mingling with each other. A more relaxed feeling had settled over the scene and I don't know if it was Alice planning or Jasper. I looked over where Jasper was busy talking with Kate, and he winked at me. It was Jasper.

We lined up to be greeted by family and friends, as they made their way out her. Some of the people I recognized from the hospital. They didn't know me well but had work with my father.

"Congrats, guys," Seth Clearwater said shaking my hand. _Don't worry about the rest of them, they will come around. Take good care of her, man_. I have always liked Seth; he seemed have a natural broad-mindedness state about him, much like Bella. He had saved any beliefs of me until after he met me. And surprising to me, in his mind, I wasn't leeched or bloodsucker, but Edward.

Next to him was his mother, Sue. She was nervous about being here, but I had to give her credit she put on a good air for a woman who has been through a lot. Death of husband, daughter losing her love because of some strange bonding incident, and having two children part of the supernatural world – all in one year.

To my surprised Billy Black was also here. Part of the reason was he was Charlie good friend and would have supported him even if his daughter was marring an age old enemy. But the other part had a new respect for the treaty we had forged. For a moment in time, we fought together to protect our lands and the people we loved.

It forges something stronger than just a piece of paper ever did.

He congratulated both Bella and I. Shaking my hand and hugging Bella.

"It's good to see things work out for you man," Seth said, bring me back to the present. "I'm so happy for you."

"Thank you, Seth. That means a lot to me," I said. "Thank you, as well. For letting Seth come. For supporting Bella today."

"You're welcome," Billy said with optimism in his tone. _Perhaps the wolf and the lion can lay down in the same meadow_

I certainly hope so.

Seth waved goodbye and wheeled Billy towards their table and the food. We had sat them with Charlie and the Webers.

Next was Angela and Ben, who I was glad to see were still together and still in love. I had told Bella about my master minding them together. She just rolled her eyes. Alice had than laughed saying something about naming their first born boy after me.

After them came Mike and Jessica – who were still together. Yah. I never seen two people who were so ill suite for each other. Bella said not to do anything because Jessica was happy and it kept Mike out of her hair. But right now I didn't like how he was checking out my wife or Jessica thoughts.

_They couldn't buy her a new dress. It's like a hundred years old. Cheap!. If it was me I would have demanded a Vera Wang at least._

_Shit she has a body. Maybe if she gets tired of married life_

Why couldn't I also have veto rights on the guest list? I let off a soft growl that had both of them scampering away. Humans might not be able to hear it, but they can feel the warning. Stay away she is mine.

Next was the Denali clan. Time to face Tanya, heads on. Tanya was ahead, reached out in embraced me, rubbing her body against me. Great she still has a thing for me. "Ah, Edward I've miss you," she said in her voice.

It took a couple of seconds to maneuver out of that hug without it looking to I was trying to avoid her. I took a step back to get away from her. "It's been too long, Tanya. You look well."

"So do you," _You're still as sexy as ever, if you ever get tired of the human._

"Let me introduce you to my wife," I said hoping she would get the hint that I wasn't interested. "Tanya this is my Bella."

Tanya looked down at Bella. _This is what you decided is more worthy than me. I could snap her in two. She would be able to please you like I would. She just plain._

I wanted to say something but I didn't. I knew what this was coming from and had nothing to do with that she was in love with me. Kate had said she wasn't used to men turning her down, which is silly. Same problem that Rose had, just different view on the reason why I should be worshiping her.

_She beautiful, Edward. She is going to make a fine vampire. You are so lucky._ Kate was amazing person. She never seemed to have a mean bone in her body. I know not helping us in our time of need had not set right with her, but she was loyal to her sisters.

"Welcome to the family, Bella," Tanya all but spit out. "We consider ourselves Carlisle's extended family and I am sorry about the, er, recent incident when we did not behave as such. We should have met you soon. Can you forgive us?"

I wanted to roll my eyes at this fake show of sincerity, because I knew that she wouldn't have side with us even if she had met Bella.

"Of course. It's so nice to meet, you," said Bella, always the diplomats. Maybe that will be in her power in the next life to bring enemies together. I was just hoping with her changing, I would finally get a glimpse into that mine.

"The Cullens are all evened up in numbers now. Perhaps it will be our turn next, eh Kate?

"Keep the dream alive," Kate said rolling her eyes. "Welcome Bella," she said with her normal generous nature. Bella reached out and shook her hand, what Bella didn't know was those hands could knock a vampire out cold if she wanted to. _I like her Edward. She has got spunk. After what Esme has told me about her, I can see why she is worth protecting._

Next came Carman and Eleazar, they had joined the group recently, but seemed to adjust to the new life better.

"I'm Carmen, this is Eleazar. We're all so very pleased to finally meet you," Carmen said. Eleazar was quiet as ever. Carmen had told me once that he was a man of very few words, unlike Carmen who could talk your ears off.

"We'll get to know each other later. We'll have eons of time for that!" Tanya laughed as the group walked away.

"You could have been a little nicer to her," Kate said Tanya.

"She is lucky I didn't snap that thin neck of her, the insult to be overlooked for a human," Tanya growled.

"He over looked you long before she came into the picture. You're just going to have to face it, Tanya. Edward isn't interesting in you nor is he gay."

Great, Kate still thought I was gay. I loupe my arms around Bella, well the worse was over and she had stood her grounds with Tanya, and I was proud of her. She smiled at me relieved to be out of that. Tanya could be sometimes too much.

The greeting line had finally ebbed away and we made our way to our table. Alice had planned on an elaborate eight course meal, so the human began to eat and the vampires pretended to eat. This gave us a couple of moments to ourselves. I should have opt for Vegas. At least I wouldn't have to deal with all the human stuff.

Bella and I took our seats as the meal begins, but we couldn't be bothered. I held her tight against me, happy for once that I wouldn't have to let her go. That she was now mine. I could hold on to her for forever.

"You should eat something," I whispered, moving her chair closer to mine. "Did I mention you look absolutely breathtaking Mrs. Cullen."

She blushed, "That's not going to help me to eat. I can't anyways. I too excited. Oh, Edward today was one of the most amazing days of my life."

"And to think you feared the wedding," I said laughing.

"I never feared getting married to you. Just standing in front of people. I was all for jeans and Elvis impersenators."

My Bella. I was looking forward to being able to spoil her without any protest. I had let Alice lose on her wardrobe, with the stipulations that there were pieces in the collection that she would want to wear. Translation, jeans and shirts.

I lean forward, trying to dazzle her. "You should eat."

"You know," she said taking some food onto her fork. "There will come a day you wouldn't be able to do that to me."

"No there wouldn't," I smiled.

The meal continued. I moved things around my plate, built a couple of statues and napkin-bolt some of the other things. But at least she ate, somewhat. For a human she eats more like a bird. "We could have told Alice no food," she suggested as I was making neat piles with the twice baked mash potatoes. "There is enough food here to feed a third world country for a year."

"Yes, but them we miss out on the napkin-bolt," I said.

"The what," she asked.

"A time honor tradition among vampires." I should introduce to one of the biggest jokes among us. I swung her around to face the table where the rest of my family, excluding Carlisle and Alice, and the Denali clan were sitting.

"First you take a bit of your food." We watched Rose take a bit of some lamb. "Than you wipe your mouth. Now while the rest of the world is thinking this person has good manors, you really are putting the food into the napkin." We watched as Rose was doing it. "Than when you think nobody is looking, you catapult the food, using the napkin." And sure enough that what's Rose did. That piece must have gone a mile.

Rose looked at me. _Idiot_

"That's why they are seated near the edge of the forest." Alice explained. "That way I don't have to worry about food hitting any of the other guests.

'The Napkin-bolt, a time honored tradition," Carlisle said. It should be. He is the one who started it and taught it to me.

Carlisle than rose from his seat and taped his fork gentle against the glass. A silence feel over the crowd as everyone turned to look at him. He gestured for Esme to join him at the head table. He was a natural orator with a gift in eloquence.

"I would like to have your attention pleased. I have a couple of words for the bride and the groom."

"In my life I have been truly blessed by a wonderful wife," he said smiling at Esme. "And five great kids, who each of them had found their own ways into our families. And tonight I am reminded of those blessings."

"When I first met Bella I was taken in by her intelligence, beauty, courage and compassion. Charlie and Renee you have raised an amazing women, who I can't begin to thank for coming into our lives."

Renee started to cry and Charlie looked pleased. They really did raise an amazing woman.

Carlisle continued. "As each one of my children became part of this family, I presented them with something. To me this something represents everything we are about and even if we are not related by blood, we share a stronger link. But unlike the rest of my children, Bella has chosen to be part of this family. She has chosen to love my son for not only who he is but also what he is. And to love our family. Bella, thank you again for giving us your warmth, you love and understanding. I can honestly say that we waited along time for you."

Both Emmett and Jasper started to clap and howler, until Rose elbow Em.

He took the box out his jacket and handed it to Bella. She was starting to cry and shake as she rose to receive the box. She knew what it was, something she had been waiting for since she met me. I know she never said it out loud and it just wasn't the piece of jewelry, but to belong to me and be part of my family.

_She is happy_ Jasper said.

"I know," I said very low key. I rose with her, holding on her tightly. She opened the box, still shaking and looked at the continents. It was the bracelet with the crest on it. She handed the box to me and jumped in to Carlisle arms.

"Thank you," she whispered to him through her tears. The crowd chuckled a little bit.

"No thank you, Bella," he said giving her a kiss on her forehead. Esme looked like she was about to cry as I put the bracelet on Bella. "Welcome to the family," I said as I kissed the wrist. She was still tearing as she hugged me. The rest of my family made their way over as they hugged her, including Rose and Jasper.

She has made our family whole, I suddenly realized. She was the missing link, the last part of the puzzle that made up the Cullen Clan. Alice had told me as we were walking into school on her first day that something exciting is going to happen, that our family was going to change, for the good. Now I understand the vision. She was seeing my soul mate and her future sister.

The rest of the room clapped as she was returned to me.

Carlisle raised his glass. "To the bride and groom, may they live for a million years in happiness."

Every chimed in. "To the bride and groom."

"Only a million years," I said.

_Mankind is probably going to blow up the planet long before than._

************************Author Note***********************************

I did ad a little something more to the wedding scene, mostly just to give my readers a treat.

While reading Midnight Sun (/pdf/midnightsun_partial_) I noticed something. Edward seems to expand on what Bella is thinking. There seemed to be more information, and that's is what I decided to do, expand more on the human parts.

Yes, there are bits and pieces from the book, Breaking Dawn. I wanted to show a connection between Bella's thoughts and Edward's thoughts.


	7. Chapter 6 Collide

Rising Sun

Chapter 6 – Collide

_but if a living dance upon dead minds_

_why,it is love;but at the earliest spear_

_of sun perfectly should disappear_

_moon's utmost magic,or stones speak or one_

_name control more incredible splendor than_

_our merely universe, love's also there:_

_­-_ _E. E. Cummings_

It took her a couple of minutes to stop crying as we made our way over to the cake. The one thing I wasn't looking forward to. Bella had asked me once what would happen if I ate normal food. I told her I could, like if someone had dared her to eat dirt. Sugar was a whole new thing. For some strange reason, that tiny molecule could do a number in one empty, stone gut.

Alice had let that part slip one day and we had the only fights involving this wedding, the cake. I told her she would understand one day, that every part of the charade was important.

So here we were standing over the one fight we ever had about the wedding. The five layer cake. I only had to take a little bit of it, just for show. In all the other weddings, we never had cake, mostly because we never really had humans at ours.

Bella and I held the knife as a million flashes fired off. Blinding her and just irritating me. We sliced into the cake, both of us as a unit. I had to be careful not to put but the tiniest amount of pressure on the knife, as it cut the first piece.

We finished a cutting the first piece each of us taking a fork full.

"Give him more, Bella, that a wimpy piece," shouted Emmett.

She just shook her head and I noticed there wasn't much on the fork. As the fork moved toward my mouth she was slowly shaking other parts of the cake off. I'll be damn, she was doing it on purpose so that I wouldn't have to take that much.

The fork slide into my mouth and there wasn't much on it. I swallowed, feeling the lead ball of confectionary delights drop to my stomach.

I feed her my piece, she taking it and swallow before I handed the knife to the waiter.

I lead her away as the waiter started to cut up the cake to past out.

"Are you okay," she said rubbing my stomach, as if it would do anything to the lead ball that now was sitting there. Her hands felt good, warming up that area.

"I'll live," I said as we pass Jasper and Emmett who were laughing. I shot them a dirty look, "I didn't see a cake at your wedding."

Bella shook her head at them. At first she would get mad at them for their harassing me, until she realized that we beleaguer each other. She learned to fire them and the claws came out. Emmett liked her even more, once she was able to play verbal wrestling matches with him.

"Yah because only a man would be brave enough to have a piece of cake," she said.

"Are you calling me, not man enough," Em said.

"Well I don't see you in line for cake," said Bella, walking away with a little smudginess on her face. Score one for Bella.

"You aren't going to let a human have one on you," Jasper said, still laughing. Emmett just growled at Jasper.

Bella was fire when she wanted to be and seemed to get bolder every day she was around me. It started with that smudge remark about not being afraid of me the first time I took her home and has escalated from there. She still reminded me of that tiny kitten standing up the tiger when she did that.

"It's time Bella," Alice said grabbing her by the arm and shoving the bouquets of flowers in her hands.

"Huh?" she said, looking very confused at the same bouquets that she handed to Alice after whacking me with them at the altar. Alice must have fixed them before she given them back. They didn't look like the ruin bunches of flowers that Alice had quickly hidden.

_I had two of them made, knowing Bella, she would destroy the first one._

"It is time for the tossing of the bouquets, can I have all the single woman on the dance floor.

I watched as most of Bella girl friends from high school, a couple other women, and Tanya made their way onto the dance floor.

"You're not going out there," I asked Kate who was standing by the dance floor.

"Have you ever been in the middle of one of those things? I remember my human sister's. It wasn't pretty. I still have the scars."

"My bet is on Tanya," Jasper.

"You're on, I am going for Jessica," Emmett said.

"Who is that tall one that Bella friends," said Kate.

"Angela?"

"That's the one, money is on her."

Bella smiled at me and toss the bouquets over her shoulders. It landed in Angela hands. She hugged it to herself like a prized gift.

_I asked Alice before hand._ I should have known. "Okay boys pay up."

I walked away rolling my eyes.

"Um Edward, where are you going," asked Alice as Bella went over to congratulate Angela. Ben was red.

I was planning on sneaking out to get rid of this thing that is in my stomach.

"It your turn," she said running for a chair.

"My turn, don't tell me your order a bouquets for me."

"No silly, you have to retrieve the garter and toss it to all the single man."

I guess the lump ball of sugar can wait.

She maneuvered Bella into a chair, and tried to grab as many single guys as she could. Funny, how there was a mad rush for the throwing of the bouquets but not for the garter.

The few she had been able to drag on the floor were Seth, Mike, Ben, Tyrone and two PA from the hospital.

"I am going to be so red," Bella whispered to me.

"I'm counting on it," I said slowly pushing her dress up, to where the garter was located mid thigh. They were incredible white, but I would have to save a slower pace at looking at them for the honeymoon. I gave her a smirk.

"You wouldn't dare," she whispered.

And with my teeth I removed it very slowly. I could feel the heat from her blush as it moved slowly down her thigh, over her knee and over her calf muscles. When it was free I winked at her and shot it at Mike face. Jessica was squalling with delight as Mike stood there looking at the garter in horror.

I could here Jasper tuning up as I hauled Bella to her feet. "That was fun, am I allowed to do it again?"

"You're going to have to wait until the honeymoon," she whispered stretching to kiss me.

"I can hardly wait," I sign leaning down to meet hers.

"Ladies and Gentlemen," came the clear smooth southern draw of Jasper. "The bride and groom will now have the first dance."

Music had been my job, something I had taken seriously. Music had been most of my world. I had lived through some incredible times, the birth of Jazz. During the 1920s and 1930s I had played in some of the biggest Speakeasies with some of the most famous artist of their time. I had seen the birth of rock n' roll and watched it evolved it to something. I saw the Ramon, the Rolling Stones, Grateful Dead, and the New York Dolls when it was the original bands. I had seen Elvis perform when he was still in upstart kid from Memphis. I had watched the Beatles come to America, and Hendrix play the national anthem at Wood Stock. I had seen the birth of grunge, acid, heavy, punk and modern rock. And I have seen it all die only to be reborn. Music filled my world. It was who I am. What I am. I play, wrote and record.

When I left Bella for that time, I had stopped listening, writing and playing all together. Every sound, every note reminded me of her.

She had inspired some of my composition, but the one I was most proud of was the lullaby. She was muse, my northern start, my soul and inspiration. Before I met her, I went through long dry spells.

It had been almost five years since I played let alone wrote before I met her. I felt I was going through some dry spell at the time. The only time I touched the piano was when I was tuning it. But when Bella came crashing through my life, I had become inspired again.

We had spent hours on my floor listening to the music, helping me pick out the music that would company this day. But our wedding song was going to be a surprised. I wanted something from her period that represented our relationship in it rawness. It happened to be one day when I was driving to pick her up that I heard the song. He was a pretty well known artist, nothing to interesting in the music itself, but the lyrics were what made me stop. It was as if he had witness our relationship in the quiet timeless moments, the ones I treasure above all.

I had talked Jasper in performing it. I thought he alone could somehow capture it. Jasper only agreed because it was for Bella.

"I didn't know Jasper, could sing," she whispered as I lead her on the dance floor.

"That's wonder boy for you," I said. "You never know what he is able to do."

"Am I going to have to worry about dancing babies," she said.

Jasper chuckled and started to play.

The guitar music started as I whisked Bella onto the dance floor. We had practice a couple of times, but in my arms she was flawless. I knew how to lead, and even though I dance many of times. Bella I would say was my real first dancing experience. She felt so light in my arms, more of an extension of me.

_The dawn is breaking_

_A light shining through_

_You're barely waking_

_And I'm tangled up in you_

_Yeah_

A thousand flashes must be going off but I didn't notice. The world faded and there was only her and I. Two halves of a perfect whole. I spun her around. Thinking back to the moments I had watched her sleep and how they affected me. The peace that I felt in her arms, I have never experience it any where else. Throughout my wondering of this earth, I never thought that there was someone out there for me. Than Bella had been born, grew up and came to Forks.

_But I'm open, you're closed_

_Where I follow, you'll go_

_I worry I won't see your face_

_Light up again_

What struck me first was the part of I'm open, you're closed. As I was opened to the world's mind and thoughts, she was private. So I had to learn about her the hard way, the normal way. I'll admit I didn't always get this right, but it never was boring. I felt normal.

_Even the best fall down sometimes_

_Even the wrong words seem to rhyme_

_Out of the doubt that fills my mind_

_I somehow find, you and I collide_

I looked down at her; her eyes were opened in concentrations for a moment before realizing why I had picked this song. I might not be able to read her mind, but her face was in open book at times. She smiled as if she agreed me. Our relationship never made sense, the predator falling in love with the prey. But somehow it worked, and I wouldn't give it up for anything. We didn't make sense, but as the song said, I somehow find, you and I collide.

_I'm quiet, you know_

_You make a first impression_

_I've found I'm scared to know_

_I'm always on your mind_

I still chuckled at the first impression part, boy did she ever. Who ever decided that Bella was to be made for me, made sure I couldn't miss her. Even if her beauty didn't strike me, her smell did. It was still mouthwatering, but I now took comfort in that smell, like a human would for the smell of homemade cookies. I still had to be on my guard, but it became easier.

_Even the best fall down sometimes_

_Even the stars refuse to shine_

_Out of the back you fall in time_

_You somehow find, you and I collide_

_Don't stop here_

_I've lost my place_

_I'm close behind_

_Even the best fall down sometimes_

_Even the wrong words seem to rhyme_

_Out of the doubt that fills your mind_

_You finally find, you and I collide_

_You finally find _

_You and I collide_

_You finally find_

_You and I collide_

"Enjoying the party, Mrs. Cullen," I whispered into her ears, as Jasper finished the song.

She laughed as I spin her around for the final time. "That will take a while to get used to."

"We have a while," I said as I lean down and kiss her. Lost in the moment, I didn't notice that the music changed until Charlie tapped me on my shoulder. The band started to play a different song.

I handed her over as I went to claim Esme for a dance.

Bella and her father were again off rhythm as I spun Esme around the room. When she first joined our family, she didn't know how to dance real well. She would make excuses to Carlisle about not wanting to go dancing with him, afraid that she might embarrass him. I had stepped in, offering to teach her. Now she was a pretty good dancer.

"I told you it would work out," Esme said as I spun her around the floor. Remembering back to every thought she had about me and Bella. She held her breathe more often, praying and hoping it would work out. I knew Bella wasn't the only one I hurt when I left. Esme and Alice had been devastated. I never realized how much they loved Bella – it was part of the reason why I left. I couldn't handle what I had done to them.

"Maybe I should have listen to you more often," I joked.

She laughed, "Oh Edward, I am so happy. You are so happy, you're glowing."

"I feel like I am glowing," I said. "Things just seem brighter."

"They always do when you are in love," she said looking Carlisle. It seemed at times that she only had eyes for Carlisle.

The music ended and Carlisle came over to claim Bella and I spun Renee out on the floor, wondering when I was going to be able to dance with Bella again.

People started to enter the dance floor as the beat picked up. I danced with Alice and Rose, before relieving them to their husbands. I noticed both of them were wearing their wedding rings today. Usually for us to pretend that we were young the wedding bands came off and they were "dating."

_Shit she looks hot and her breast, wow, never noticed how big they were._ Newton said as images of my wife naked came flashing into my mind. Nobody should have visions of my wife naked except me.

I quickly tore her away from Mike.

"Still not that fond of Mike, eh?" Bella said as I watched Tanya interested him. Good go with her, and leave my wife alone.

"Not when I have to listen to his thoughts. He's lucky I didn't kick him out," I growled. "Or worse." Visions of what I wanted to do to Newton flowed through my head before I was able to shake them off.

"Yeah, right," Bella said. One day she was full going to understand the fuss and I was determined to be there.

"Have you had a chance to look at yourself?"

"Um. No, I guess not. Why?" she asked surprised.

"Then I suppose you don't realize how utterly, heartbreakingly beautiful you are tonight," I said looking the celestial being in my arms. "I'm not surprised Mike's having difficulty with improper thoughts about married woman. I am disappointed that Alice didn't make sure you were forced to look in a mirror," I whispered. I was going to have a long talk with my sister about that. I know there were mirrors in her room, maybe not as many as Rose. But enough that she could have made sure Bella had seen herself.

"You are very biased, you know." I really wished that was the case so I wouldn't have to listen to every male in this room thoughts on her tonight.

I signed and stopped. Turning her around, I wanted her to see for herself what I was talking to her. She stood there staring at the most beautiful creature in the world, herself being reflected in the windows of the house. I pointed just to make sure she understood that she was looking at herself.

"Biased, am I?"

I wanted to her to see the dark haired beauty by my side. I wanted her to see her perfect cream and rose skin, her huge deep brown eyes. The way the dress flowed on her and how elegant and graceful she was. I wanted to understand how beautiful she really was.

_Edward, man, can I have a moment with Bella_

***********************Author Note*************************************

The song is from Howie Day called Collide. The first time I heard it, I thought Edward and Bella's relationship. Needless to say, it became their wedding song.

As for Jasper, like I said before, I noticed in Midnight Star, there was a lot more observation about Jasper than in Twilight.

And now comes the moment you all been waiting for…Jacob…


	8. Chapter 7 Gesture

Rising Sun

Chapter 7 – Gesture

_Though I had long perned in the gyre,_

_Between my hatred and desire_

_I saw my freedom won_

_And all laugh in the sun._

_­-_ _William Butler Yeats_

Originally I wasn't going to invite Jacob to the wedding. After everything he had put Bella through, the hurt that she felt when he forced her to choose. I couldn't write it off as prejudice because I felt no animosity for the rest of the pack, instead I felt gratitude. They helped me protect Bella, when even everyone else had turned it back.

Him, on the other hand, I felt a strange acrimony towards. I had felt it the first time he had showed up at prom. I knew the reason he was there, but if it was possible the hair on the back of my neck to stand, it would have. I hated that Bella had insisted on keeping the friendship, I hated that I was bound by a treated not to be around her when she was on their land. But above all my odium, I hated that he had held her together when I left, that he protected her when I couldn't and that even with the supernatural chromosome floating in his gene pool, he still can and will be able to be human for her.

Than the last couple of weeks happened, time stopped for a while and made Bella and I focus on what happened and we had sorted through all the things including the Jacob issue, including my fears and insecurities. I had never admitted how indignant I have been over it; Bella was dealing with a lot during that time and I didn't want to put more on her by expressing what I was going through. I held back and let if festered until it had no where to go but out.

It was one thing to lose her to another man, but quiet another to lose her to the enemy. A reminder of what I would never be with her. It had sparked unknown fears inside of me.

What if I wasn't enough for her?

And it was one of the reasons why I had stayed behind during the fight. She had asked me, she didn't want me to be killed.

And selfishly I accepted.

During the weeks leading up to the wedding, I had come to the realization – there was never competition for her affections.

Jacob had only been a friend and brother to her. No matter how eschewed his feeling might be, she would never change. No matter how many times Bella had tried to release him, he had been the one to wiggle his way back into her life. He kept putting Bella through torture, so that he could hold on some weird shimmer of feeling from her, that didn't exist. Not that I would blame him, because I would to do it, if she desires it.

So I sent the invitation with a note, saying if it was me, I would want the chose. Hopefully he had put these feeling aside and allowed Bella to be happy on her day.

"Oh," I said smiling.

"What is it?" She asked.

"A surprised wedding gift," I said, twirling her away from the dance floor into the night. I paused when we reached the huge cedars that begin the woods; they were at the edge of our property - neutral grounds.

"Thank you, this is very …kind of you," I couldn't come up with the right word. Many things were running in his brain, and I cringed at the hurt I saw before he swallowed it and reminded himself that he was doing this for Bella.

"Kind is my middle name," Jacob said coming out of the shadows. "Can I cut in?"

Her eyes widen and I knew I did the right thing. I knew Jacob being here would put things right in Bella world, and she would finally forgive herself for what had happen a month ago.

"Jacob," she said as she hugged him, like she welcoming a long lost brother home.

I bowed out; making the excuse that Rosalie wouldn't forgive me for not dancing with her.

She was happy, that all I cared about.

"You did the right thing," Carlisle said as I walked by him.

"You think," I said, pleased. The rest of my family wasn't too happy with Jacob, especially Alice. They were protective of this human.

"Forgiveness isn't easy, but she needed him here, to set everything right," Carlisle said.

Alice came up to us. "I see the dog is here," she said in a grunt voice. She above the rest really didn't like him. He hurt two people that she loved and in her mind, that was unforgivable.

"By the way, how come you never showed Bella what she looked like," I said, trying to get her mind off the other guest.

"I didn't want her to ruin the effect," she said. Alice was all about the effect.

"Effect – Alice next time, show her what she looks like. She thinks she is plain tonight."

"Edward no matter how many times she sees herself in the mirror she is going to thinking she is plain. She is humble; she doesn't see her as any thing special. And no amount of mirror watching is going to change that."

"You still could have shown her," I grumbled.

"Now children," Carlisle laugh, breaking us up.

I hadn't been paying attention when I heard two voice rising, one of them Bella. I looked over where Bella and Jake were dancing. I had stayed out the conversation to give them some privacy. They had stopped dancing, and he was holding her wrist rather tight.

"Oh, no," said Seth, who was walking by us, with his third piece of cake. _The pack is out there, just incase Jake couldn't handle it. They were going to crash the party a little later to pay their respects to Bella._

"Ow, Jake! Let go!" She cried out.

I looked at Carlisle, my instincts said to break them up, but was I being my over protective self? And Jacob had to realize he was hurting her. Carlisle looked concern too, his mouth twisting a snarl.

"Bella, have you lost your mind? You can't be that stupid! Tell me you're joking!" he shouted at her while shaking her. Her head was flopping like a rag doll and her heart was picking up a panic rhythm. She was scared.

It took everything not to break into vampire speed, and at this point I really didn't care if anyone sawed. Bella was being threatened.

"Jake-stop!" she was now yelling in pain. How dare that dog touch her! I was going to ripe him apart. Every time he is around her, he managed to hurt her one way or another.

Seth was by my side. "You'll hurt her. Let her go."

_We got your back bro,_ Em thought

"NOW" I growled, pulling my full strength into it. I was posed for the attack, the only thing I hope was that Jasper or Emmett would be able to stop me or get Bella out of here in time.

Jacob hands dropped to his sides and Bella was in my arms quicker than even I could imagine. Her wrist was a little bruised from the lack of blood flow and she was shaking from being jolted around. She pressed her face into my chest, and I took comfort knowing that she was in my arms and safe.

Where she should be.

How could I be so stupid as to leave them alone? I know what that dog is cable of doing. How could he be that careless with her? How could I?

"C'mon, Jake. Let's go," said Seth trying to push him towards the woods. _I'm sorry, _Seth kept saying over and over again in his mind. I know he or the pack weren't personally responsible for Jacob. This was between me and him.

I growled, pushing Bella behind me. Jasper and Emmett were standing there next to me protecting Bella. Bella kept her arms around me; as if she could hold me back if I was going to strike.

"I'll kill you," Jacob was whispering with rage. Bring it on dog. "I'll kill you myself. I'll do it now!" _You're going to kill her, blood sucker. Is that all she is to you?_

_I think someone had to much punch_ Sam thought _I am coming out in form to get Jake, before he does anything I am going to regret in the morning._

I whispered that Sam was coming to my brothers so that they weren't going to get alarmed. Jasper was watching with tense eyes. I have only seen only a handful of times in attack mode. Years of being in a war had sharpened his skills that he could easy take out a dog the size of Sam. And he had been itching to strike Jacob for a long time now; right now it would be justified.

Sam came, pushing Jacob back into the woods where the rest of the pack was waiting for him.

_I am really sorry about this, Edward. I thought he had a grip on it, _Sam thought. _Tell Bella I said congratulations._

The rest of the pack chimed in their apology and congratulations. I think Quil was muttering that he was looking forward to crashing the blood suckers party again. How could Jake ruin the peace? How could he do this to Bella?

"I'm sorry," Bella said. I knew she was blaming this on her, and it wasn't her fault. I had allowed it, welcome it. I had hope that it would finally easy the guilt that Bella had, but it didn't. She was feeling worse than ever, or at least I thought.

_You are going to kill her Edward! Her blood is going to be on you hands, leech._

"All right," I tried to sound like it wasn't as big of deal, trying to forget Jacob thoughts in my head. But the words kept bouncing around, like a song that gets stuck in there. Repeating over and over again. "Let's go back."

"But Jake-" she said, sounding worried.

"Sam has him in hand. He's gone." Sam was now on the boarder, bellowing Jacob about it. Jacob muttered something about leaving him along and took off. At least he wasn't heading back to the party.

"Edward, I'm so sorry, I was stupid- "she said shaking. I hated Jacob even more than before because what he was doing to Bella. Doesn't he understand how this is tearing her apart? She should be happy today, overjoyed. This might be the last time she sees most of these people, she should be celebrating, not berating herself.

"You had done nothing wrong," I said trying to reinsure her that this was my fault. I held her in my arms as she trembled, pressing my face to her hair. I had to reassure myself that she was alright.

"I have such a big mouth! Why would I…I shouldn't have let him get to me like that. What was I thinking?"

"Don't worry," I said touching her face, trying to calm her down. "We need to get back to the reception before someone notices our absence." Most of the party was staring in our direction.

"Give me two seconds," she whispered. I knew she was pulling herself together, like she did when ever we were hitting her with something big. She would straighten her shoulders and marched back into what ever she was supposes to do. She had done it Italy, in the forest, when she confronted Jacob the last time and now.

"My dress?" When did she start worrying about clothing? I think Alice finally gotten to her. She did a quick inspection including smoothing out her hair.

""You look fine. Not a hair out of place." She looked as beautiful as before.

And this time she didn't go chasing after Jacob, like before. I know this was difficult, but a glimpse in her eyes, showed me something I wasn't expecting. Was she angry at Jacob for doing this to her?

"Okay, Let's go," she said, starting to march towards the dance floor like she was going into battle.

I put my arms around her, leading her back towards the party. I needed a couple of minuets.

_Are you okay, bro_ Jasper thought, trying to calm me down.

"Give me a second," I said low enough that she couldn't her. I didn't want to stress her out even more.

The music picked up a little, thankful for something a little faster.

"Are you –"

"I'm fine," she said. "I can't believe I did that. What's wrong with me?"

You just care too much about others and Jacob keeps taking advantage of it, that all. I thought.

"Nothing is wrong with you," me on the other hand. Jacob was right; I was going to end up killing her. What was I thinking agree to a real honeymoon? His voice, accusing me of the crime that I would soon be committing echoed in my head. Her blood would be on my hands.

"It's over," she said. "Let's not think of it again tonight. Edward?"

"Jacob is right," I whispered. "What am I thinking?"

Bella has always had the ability to surprise me in her thinking patterns. Tonight was no exception. "He is not; Jacob is way too prejudiced to see anything clearly."

No he wasn't, he was right. I could feel all the doubts and fears that I have been working to avoid come flowing back into me. "_Should_ let him kill me for even thinking..." I whispered not even looking at her. I wasn't even sure I she could hear me.

She gripped my face, and with all the strength she had forced me to look at her. If I wasn't afraid that she would break her arms doing this, I would still be looking down at our feet.

"Stop it." My eyes opened to the force of her words. She never once commanded something of me. "You and me. That's the only thing that matters. The only thing you're allowed to think about now. Do you hear me?"

"Yes," I whispered. If she would command me, I would cut of my own head and presented it to me.

"Forget Jacob came." I would do that for her. "For me, Promise that you'll let this go," She whispered starring into my eyes.

"I promise," I don't know how but for her sake I would.

"Thank you Edward," she smiled. I knew for that smile I would do anything for. "I am not afraid."

"I am," I whispered. So afraid.

"Don't be," than she smiled bigger. "By the way, I love you."

Those words stopped me cold and brought me back. This amazing creature loved me. Even after a thousand years, I would never get tired of her saying them to me.

"You're monopolizing the bride," Emmett said coming up behind me. "Let me dance with my little sister. This could be my last chance to make her blush." He said and before I could agree he swept her out of my arms and away from me.

Jasper grabbed my arms, pulling me away from Emmett and Bella and into the thick of the woods. I was more paralyzed at what had just happened to fight him. Was I going to end up killing Bella?

"Where are we going?"

"For a walk, don't worry, Emmett has her," Jasper said. "We need to talk."

He didn't say anything, his brain focusing on getting me as far away from the party, so at least the human half couldn't hear.

"First off calm down, Edward, she is okay."

"How can you say that she is okay? He is right, I am going to kill her," I said. Ever single fear that I have had since the moment I meet her came back into my mind. What was I even thinking?

_Okay, it is time that you and I have a little one on one chat. I am sorry for almost killing her. More sorry than I have ever been. Can you ever forgive me?_

"Huh," I said my mine racing back to the party. "What do you mean that you are sorry?" What did this have to do with Jacob accusing me of soon to be manslaughter?

"_If I had more disciplined, better control and didn't try to take a snap at her at her birthday, you would never have left, Jacob would have come into the picture and we wouldn't be standing her having this conversation."_

Jasper was, for the first time, allowing me to feel the guilt he had had over what happened almost a year ago. I know that Bella had asked Alice if Jasper was angry with her, because he seemed to avoid her. Alice, trying to explain Jasper as best as he could, told her no.

Bella didn't understand. She later asked me about it. The only thing I could tell her is that Jasper feels thing tens time more than the average vampire and sometimes feelings overwhelm him. He can be moody, at times.

_I was guarding it around you. You weren't handling leaving well and I felt if you felt my guilt over everything than you would feel a whole lot worse. I sat there in the woods, watching her slowly crumble when you said goodbye waiting until Sam found her, feeling the worse than ever before. I was the reason you were giving her up. If I hadn't lost control you wouldn't have felt like you needed to leave._

"Jasper I don't blame you."

_Than why wouldn't you let it go?_

That was a good question, why hadn't I let it go. I know Jasper wasn't responsible for his own instincts. I have lost myself a couple of times, the only thing was that Bella had been able to pull me back.

This life chose wasn't easy, it felt like every moment of the day we were battling up hill, with very loose sand. It was a struggle every time we were among humans and we have all failed at one point or another. The only difference is that we refused to give into that failure.

_I never told you this, but you know when I left Alice for that month._

Who could forget, we all thought Alice was going to actually end up dying from depression, the first vampire in history. Nothing seemed to make her happy; she just lay in their bed, like a dead stump. Not moving, letting her hunger get worse and worse.

_The main reason I left was I thought I couldn't give her what she needed. She wanted to part of this family so bad – and I didn't know if I could do it. I lived almost a hundred years of instant gratification. Now I had to deny myself. I hated myself for not being strong enough. She seemed to like you and I thought this is what she wanted._

"Jasper, I love her like my sister that is all she is to me."

_I know that now, but back than I wasn't as confident in that love. I saw you as the epitome of perfection and something I would never be. I hated you, but I hated myself more for not being able to be you. And I thought she would be better off without me. That she should be with you._

"Did you ever discuss this with her?"

_Did you discuss why you were going to leave Bella with her before doing it? Like you I thought I knew best. I understood why you left Edward. Like me, Alice happiness was more important than my survival. I just wanted her to be happy, even if it wasn't with me. I didn't realize that she loved me and choose me. Not because I was perfect, but because I was who she wanted. I have learned since than to trust that love and not ask questions to why she loves me._

"But you came back; it only took you a month."

_No she found me. Like Bella found you. I was too scared to come back. But once she took me back, I swore I wouldn't leave her again. What I am getting at is that Bella loves you Edward as much as you love her. I don't need enhance abilities to understand that._

"You heard Jacob; he was willing to forgo a treaty to not hurt her."

_Jacob is immature; he is just infatuated with her. It is the forbidden fruit. If he really and truly loved her, he would understand that this is what she wants and needs. He was around her when you weren't here. He should see and understand the difference."_

"I see the inside his mind," I said.

_And I felt what was in his heart and hers. She loves you more than I think she can handle at times. She is strong for a human. _

"I don't know what I should do?"

_I'll tell you what you going to do; you are going to get rid of that piece of cake that his been floating around inside of you. Take a deep breathe, and go dance with you bride. This is your wedding day, one of the happiest days of your existence. As for me I am going save my new sister from Em and than going to spend the rest of the evening reacquainting myself with my wife. Come back when you are ready._

"Thanks."

I stood there for a couple of moments lost in what Jasper had told me. We have been through to much; I had fought too hard to keep her. I love her and yes if the tables were turned; I could honestly walk away from her and let her be happy. Because it did matter to me that she was happy, no matter if I couldn't make her happy.

But I had finally realized I was that happiness, that no matter how much this didn't make sense to me, I will always be part of it. And it made me happy. Overwhelmingly so.

I walked back towards the party, feeling better about myself and the future. It would be one with Bella.

Jasper had claimed her for a dance, and I watched as he twirled her around the floor.

"I never got to thank you," Jasper said.

"For what," Bella said a little surprised. I had a feeling once she turned, they were going to close. Just like Alice and me.

"For being Alice friend, you don't know what that means to her and me. She hasn't had many, and at times she feels alone. Rose loves her, but they have their rough patches. Also for forgiving me, for taking a snap at you. For loving us," he said. "I guess also for putting up with us."

"You don't have to thank me for those things. I love Alice, how could you not. As for my birthday, I never was angry with you. I was more upset with myself for causing you such pain."

"You were?"

"Alice had told me how much this was a struggle for you and how much your graduation meant to her. That you faced one of the biggest challenges and overcame it. I just felt bad that every time I was at your house that I was forcing you to leave," she said. "And than my party, I almost caused you to loss what you what you were fighting for."

She was really one of a kind; she was the only person who took personal responsibility for what had happen.

Jasper lean down and kissed her on the cheek. I caught Alice eye, who was talking to Angela. She smiled. Everything was falling to place.

_You asked me about Jasper. He does love her; he just doesn't know how to be around her or you, that's all. I think he finally figured it out._

_You know, Edward_ Great, Tanya, that's all I need. _I am still trying to understand what you see in something like her._

"You know, Tanya, I hope you fall madly in love with someone, because than you will get your answer."

I walked away from Tanya and back to where I wanted to be, in Bella's arms. Alice was waiting at the side of the dance floor for Jasper to come to claim her. Esme and Carlisle waltz by; lost in their own world and I don't even want to know where Rose and Emmett had disappeared to.

I claimed her for the next dance, and the rest of the night, allowing the peace and happiness that she inspired in me to overflow. We were finally together as the evening was starting to end. A moon was rising over the mountain, shimmering its light on the river below. The night crickets had picked up a song, while the fireflies danced to it.

Pure Magic.

A couple of people were dancing on the dance floor. Jessica and Mike had left, getting into another one of their fights. Mike was confused, having no ideal that a succubus had seduced him.

"I could get used to this," she said, breaking the silence. I look down at her, as she pressed her head into my chest.

"Don't tell me you gotten over your dancing issue?" I said. All the times I had to drag her on to a dance floor and our senior year prom she boycotted. If I had it my way, I would have gone. I would have loved to see her dressed up, like now, in my arms like now. Our junior prom was something special for me, a memory that I would always treasure, among the many I had.

"Dancing isn't so bad-with you. But I was thinking of more of this," she pressed her body even tighter into mind. I could feel her heart gently thumping against my chest, echoing inside my body. It felt as if her heart was beating for mine. "Of never having to let you go," she said.

"Never," I whispered, taking her lips. This had to be the best kiss, I thought as my lips moved with hers in rhythm of our body and the music. Her heart started to race as the world drifted away into the darkness. There was only her and I.

_Edward, it's time_.

Only Alice would have to ruin the mood.

"Bella! It's time!" she said, excited that she could play dress up again. She wasn't guarding her mind allowing me to see the next ensemble she had planned for Bella. As much as I like the vision of Bella in that getup, it wasn't enough to release her.

I just continued to kiss Bella, she would go away eventually if you ignored her long enough.

"Do you want to miss your plane?" Alice said not giving up.

_Sorry, Edward, I tried to keep her occupied as long as I could. _Jasper thought. I couldn't be too mad at him. He did try.

"I'm sure you'll have a lovely honeymoon camped out in the airport waiting for another flight."

As long as I am with Bella. I stop kissing her long enough to growl "Go away, Alice." I returned my lips to hers, not wanting this moment to end.

Alice tired another approach. "Bella, do you want to wear that dress on the airplane"

When Bella didn't responded. She smirked at me and than said, "I'll tell her where you're taking her, Edward. So help me, I will."

I stopped moving. Alice was used to getting her way with this family. She didn't see anything wrong with taking a couple of cheap shots in the processes.

"You're awfully small to be so hugely irritating."

"I didn't pick out the perfect going-away dress to have it wasted," she snapped back, as if it justified ruining the moment. She grabbed Bella out of my arms. "Come with me, Bella."

Bella fought long enough to kiss me one more time before being dragged away by Alice.

_Go get change, Edward._

I was waiting at the bottom of the stairs, dressed and ready. Jasper had gone to fetch the Aston Martin. They wouldn't let me get it myself, something about having to prepare it. I rolled my eyes; I already knew what they were up too…I just wonder if Rose and Alice know that their good Jimmy Choo shoes were being used for decorations.

I turned to look as Bella was coming down the stairways a cute flying ensemble. She looked amazing in my favorite color on her. Alice had been instructed when picking out the wardrobe that I really liked that color on her. She just rolled her eyes and told me to broaden my horizon.

I took her hand but she lean out of it, looking for someone.

"Dad?" she asked me. I pulled her through the crowd, knowing this might be the last time she saw him.

We found Charlie, leaning up against one of the column with tears in his eyes.

"Oh, Dad!" she hugged him around the waste, tears streaming down again.

"There now, you don't want to miss your plane," Charlie said patting her back. He looked at me _You better take good care of her, Edward_ he said silently. Some how he knew this might be his last goodbyes.

"I love you forever, Dad. Don't forget that."

"You too, Bells. Always have always will."

"Call me," he said as she took my hand. I knew they would never see her again. But phone calls were safe. I just hope one day they would forgive me for taking their daughter away.

"Go on, then," said Charlie. "Don't want to be late."

I pulled her to my side as the guest made a path between the porch and my car. Jasper had driven the Martin up, covered in painting that said just married, shoes tied to my bumper and condoms stuck everywhere. So that's what happened to the ones Emmett didn't use to decorate the house.

"Are you ready?" I asked.

"I am," she said with a clear confidence. She was ready to become one of us, ready to be by my side for the rest of eternity and I was ready.

I kissed her one last time on the porch before we made the mad dash to the car, being shower by rice. Emmett, who finally showed up again with a very dazzled Rose, was throwing them directly at me.

I tried to shield her from the ricocheting rice as she climbed into the car. I moved a little faster than I should to get side car.

Bella stuck her face and hands out the window to tell everyone that she loved them one last time.

She rolled her window up and settled into the seat. I took her hand, giving it a light squeeze.

"I love you," I said.

"That's why we're here," she said leaning her head against my arm. I kissed her hair.

We turned out of the driveway and I punched the accelerator. I could hear Jacob lonely cries, but couldn't care. For once in my life, the world was right. This is where she belonged and where I belonged. The sound was fading like a bad memory. One day I hope Bella could look back at the last two years with no recollection of that dog other than a fond memory of a good friend.

I speed into the night and to my future. I looked down here her arms was resting on my arms. On her wrist was the bracelet with the family crest on it, symbolizing she belong to my family now. On her finger was the ring symbolizing that she was mine.

********************************AUTHOR NOTES***********************

Jacob has never been one of my favorite characters, but after writing this I have a whole new respected for the mutt. While reading (more than once) Eclipse, I was getting more and more annoyed with him. But he did serve a purpose. Bella need to face the alternative, the what ifs…and Jacob was the one who provided it.

This made her choice in Edward that much more powerful. She had been given the chose of a normal life, but her love for Edward was stronger. I like that she understood it, respected it and didn't question it.

What I find annoying was the good bye scene, which he was trying to force Bella to feel something that she really didn't. Bella is a character that understands her emotions, she isn't blinded by other people…she knows she loves Jacob, but she isn't in love with Jacob. She doesn't feel sorry for choosing Edward just that she miss lead her (I read that chapter more than once when I was writing this one).

With that said…Nobody really addressed Edward to much…and I give Edward credit, he was the bigger man, knowing that Bella needed to have Jacob forgive her. And step aside for him to make peace with her.

As for Jasper, unlike Bella who has very little dealings with him, Edward would have much more. I wanted to create a relationship where it wasn't perfect, where both Edward and Jasper had there falling outs. In other words I wanted something real that wasn't perfect. Their relationship will play out more, so will Jacobs and Edward.

So on to the honeymoon.


	9. Chapter 8 Honeymoon

Rising Sun

Chapter 8 – Honeymoon

_She walks in beauty, like the night _

_Of cloudless climes and starry skies._

_­- Lord Byron_

We were on the last leg of our journey. We had made the flight from Port Angle to Seattle with not much time to spare. She had but settled in when we reached Seattle.

I hauled her across the airport in Seattle to our flight to Houston. From Houston, we were flying to Rio De Janeiro and to pick up my sailing yacht. I had the Catalina shipped down there from Seattle. I haven't had much time in recent years to yacht, we were a good deal away from a good yachting port.

The ship had been sitting in dry dock for a couple of years.

I have been yachting since my early days as a human. My father had owned one and I had grown up on the Lakes. I had spent most of my time, especially during the yachting season, on it. There were a couple of places that we moved to that I could bring out _Elizabeth III_. But not here.

So when I was offered Isle Esme, I more than jumped on the chance. Not only would the island allow me time alone with Bella free from the worries of preying eyes, but I would have to sail to get there.

************************************************************************

The plane to Rio was a lot bigger than the little petal hopper that we took to Seattle or the Boeing 787. The first class cabin sat on the second deck of the plane. It was amazing how much mankind had advanced from a twelve minute flight to have a two story airplane.

"Is it Rio," she asked taking a set next to the window. She has been trying to figure out where we were heading since we started. The guess had kept me entertain during the times that she was awake. At least she wasn't trying to do what she did last time we flew internationally, and stay wake during the whole time.

"You're not going to guess," I said, taking the seat next to her. The stewardess came back, handing me the pillows. I popped one behind my head. Bella took the blanket and spreading it out. One thing that was good about first class. The blankets were thicker. Not that I flew anything else when I had to fly commercially.

Usually we chartered or flew one of ours own planes, but International flights were tricky and hard to get flight plans approved of so we preferred to do international flights commercial.

"Come on, a hint," she pleaded. Giving me the best puppy eyes that she could. I never knew I could drive her up the wall with a secret.

"Okay, it's a place," I said.

She grumbled, "That not a hint."

"Come on sleepy head, you had a big day and your going to have another big day, tomorrow. Plus I don't think you are going to sleep much after this," I said leaning her back into my arms. She settled in easy, as the cabin was getting ready for the flight. I kissed her on the forehead as her eyes started to drift a sleep.

The flight took off and as soon as we were airborne, I push our seats back, getting ready to settle in. I didn't need sleep, but since we are used to the charade, I was going to have to keep my eyes closed for a good part of the journey.

"I love you, Bella," I whispered.

I played around with the screens, selecting a music list from their collections of CD. I had my Ipod Touch stored in the overhead compartment.

"Honeymooners," the guy across the isle whispered to me.

He was an older gentleman, in his early 70s. His wife was also fast asleep on his arms.

I nodded and smile.

"So are we," he said proudly.

"Congratulations," I whispered.

"Yep, this will be our 50th honeymoon."

"How long have you been married," I asked, not to surprise. The man thoughts were mostly on his wife who was snoring by his side.

"Sixth-four years and I still love this girl. That's a trick of having a long and happy marriage. Take plenty of honeymoons."

I would have to file that away. Not that I have any problems taking more than one honeymoon. Hopefully one day I would get a chance to brag to someone I am taking Bella on our 50th honeymoon.

I closed my eyes, as Bella stirred a little. She wrapped her arms around me, digging her face more into my chest. "My Edward," she murmured.

Yes, I was.

I wrapped the blanket more securely around her and closed my eyes, letting the music drift through both of our headphones.

Every now in then I would open them to watch Bella sleep. She was smiling and would mummer something coherent, but for the most part she stayed in dream land.

She slept deeply thought the flight, not moving much. I noticed she always sleep deeper when I was with her. I like that I was the caused of her getting a good night sleep.

Her eyes fluttered opened as we circle the airport, getting ready for the approach.

"Good morning, Beautiful," I said as she stretch and look up at me.

"Good morning," she said leaning forward to give me a kiss. "Where are we?"

"Over Rio, look out the window, you can see the city and the mountains."

We landed, in good time and I rushed her through the airport, stopping to claim our baggage. "So it isn't Rio," Bella asked.

"Nope," I said. Even though the island was part of Brazil, it was a good 20 miles out in the Atlantic.

"Antarctica?"

"You really want to try penguins don't you?"

It took a couple of minuets of arguing in Portuguese for us to be on our way. Bella sat quietly in the cab content on watching the world through the windows. She hadn't been many places, and seemed to be content holding my hand and watching the city past us by. Maybe we will take a day trip here. I think she would like Rio. It was one of my favorite cities, especially the music scene.

"Is there a language you don't speak?"

"I was thinking of learning Sand Script, next."

I spoke more than forty-two languages. This comes with have unlimited amount of time on your hands and no love life. Wonder if I was going to slow down and let everyone catch up, the way I was starting to catch up on Carlisle.

We arrived in the harbor; we would have a good hour before the sun set.

"Thanks," I said in Portuguese to the taxi driver, handing him the money.

I picked up the suitcases and lead us to where _Elizabeth III_ was tied up. It looked like they did a good job with her; I could smell the new paint and finishes. Her oil had been changed and they had run her engine like I had asked them too.

I got her ready in less than a couple of minuets and we were on our way.

Sailing I always called my slow pleasure. Even though _Elizabeth _can reach up to speeds over 60 knots with her sails opened, I wouldn't call her fast by the standards of my car. But sailing was more about the journey and less about the destination, the way vacations used to be.

"We are going to Atlantis!"

Bella was enjoying the ship. She closed her eyes a couple of times and allowed the spray to hit her face. Halfway during the journey she had asked if it was hard to learn how to sail. I told her no, bring her over to the wheel, I started to show her the basics of sailing. She was now tucked safely in my arms, helping me staring

I was afraid she might be one of those who get sea sickness; she had grown up in a desert.

Later on I when we aren't in a rush, I would take her out, drop the motor and allow the sails to fly. That was one the most amazing feeling out there.

"Are we going much further," she asked. I could see where she was getting a little worry, all around us was water. She couldn't see it, but I saw the island rising out of the surf.

"About another half hour," I said.

The sun was starting to set, dragging behind it the a beautiful display of color/

"Bella, look there," I shouted pointing to a small island coming out of the sea. Carlisle had bought this island as a wedding present for Esme. We only have heard about it, but Esme had offered it to me, when I was trying to figure out where I could take her on our honeymoon. That she would be comfortable with me, were we could be private.

The island would be very hot this time of year, which would be perfect for her, because my body temperature was below average. We had always dealt with that problem with blankets. But I had promised her a real honeymoon, which meant I had to find a way for her to be comfortable.

I was getting nervous about what was ahead of us. You can only read so much about a subject before your realize you really have no clue about it. I hadn't had much experience with women when I was a human and none since I was turned. I had felt mostly alone in the universe, until I met Bella. For me, there could be no other."Where are we?" she asked.

"This is Isle Esme," I said, cutting off the engine and allowing the boat to drift to the dock. I jumped out quickly tying the boat to docks.

"Isle Esme?"

"A gift from Carlisle – Esme offered to let us borrow it," I explained. It wasn't the only island we owned. Where else were a bunch of vampires going to go on vacation. We owned one off of Hawaii, Fiji (Jasper and Alice actually own that one – it was where they were heading now), two in Caribbean and one off the coast of Africa. We liked to vacation in warm places.

I placed the suitcase on the dock and reached for Bella. She was extremely light in my arms.

"Aren't you suppose to wait for the threshold?" she asked.

I picked up the suitcases. "I'm nothing if not thorough."

The island had one small house on it. Nothing special likes our others, because this was a private retreat for Carlisle and Esme. We never came here as a family, so it was kind of like the joke of the forbidden corridor.

Rose was in pissed that I was even offered it. But Rose and Em weren't dealing with the problem that I was.

I walked through the jungle towards the small house. Esme had reinsured me that she had the place stock for Bella.

I could hear Bella heart over the other sounds in the jungle. I looked down just to make sure she was okay, but she was staring ahead. Was she as nervous as I was?

My heart would be beating quicker if it could. I tried not to think about it, but I was worrying. Would I hurt her? Would I be able to please her?

Stop it, I yelled at myself. This is Bella.

But this was more than Bella. This was the love of my life, my soul mate. Would we be compatible sexually? I knew that there was no going back, that she fulfilled her part now it was up to me.

And I wanted it more than anything else, to feel her body next to mine, to be part of her. I have fantasy of it since the first night she asked me if it was possible. Fantasy I hadn't allowed until up to this point.

I set the suitcase to open the door. Stopping for a moment to look down at her; she turned her face to look up at me. Her brown eyes met mine and I walked through the threshold.

The house was silent, waiting an anticipating for us. There were two bedrooms, a main room with a kitchen. It was small on scale compared to the rest of our houses. But than again, the only vampires that this house has seen was Carlisle and Esme. We made our way to our room. I liked the sound of that. _Our room_.

I could hear the ocean from this room and smell the water and sand. The water would be warm this time of year, even at night. That was good. We could probably go for a swim.

Swimming was a good idea, right now. I needed something to relax.

I felt like everything was going off at once.

"I'll go get the luggage." I said shyly. I walked away from her and feeling stupid. I could recite poems at drop of hat, composed pieces of music and speak more languages including perfect French and all I could figure out what to say was I'll go get the luggage.

_Get a grip on yourself Edward, you been around Bella. This isn't the first time you have been alone with her._

I returned quickly, she was studding the bed right now. I watched her for a second, as a drop of perpetration ran down her next. I reached out to wipe it away.

"It's a little hot here," I said. "I thought ….that it would be best."

"Through," she murmured. I chuckled, hearing the nervousness in my own voice.

"I tried to think of everything that would make this…easier," I admitted. I wanted her to be comfortable, to feel love and not have to worry.

The breeze picked up and reminded me of the ocean. She liked to swim, so maybe we could relax a little. "I was wondering, if…first…maybe you'd like to take a midnight swim with me?" I said. I felt like I was asking her out on our first date. _For pete sakes Edward she is your wife, you shouldn't be nervous around her_. But I was.

"Sounds nice," she said, her voice breaking a little. She said yes to me again!

"I'm sure you'd like a human minute or two…It was a long journey." I need a moment or two, just to get my thoughts order and some sort of plan on how I was going to attempt this.

She nodded. Feeling a little bolder I moved my lips against her throat, just below her ears. I could smell her response. "Don't take too long, Mrs. Cullen," I whispered, brushing my lips down her throat towards her shoulder. I wanted to continue this, to kiss each part of her body, but I needed a moment.

"I'll wait for you in the water."

I walked out the doors onto the sand. I was feeling a little bolder now as I shrugged out of my shirt, dropping it on the floor.

The water was lapping at my feet as I stood there and undressed. I debated about leaving my boxers on, but I figured if I was going to do, I would do it all the way.

One of the days when it was too sunny for school I had talked Bella into joining me for a swim. It was a little pool high up in the mountains, but because of underwater springs, it was very warm. We spent most of the day, playing in the water, and I offend wonder what it would be like for us to skinny dip. I know from time to time, Jasper and Alice came up there to do just that.

Now I would get my answer. I waded out into the water and than dove in. The water was relaxing against my muscles. What I had waited for almost two years was now going to become realty.

I immerged from the water and stood there starring at the moon as it shinned down. I could hear the shower going on; I guess she needed more than a minuet. A couple of moments later the shower turned off.

I was about ready to head back to the house to see what taking her so long, when I heard her feet approach the water edge, the sand crunching with each step, and her heart beating wildly in her chest.

It was nerves; I knew the difference in the sounds, mixed in with excitement.

This was it – our first time.

I didn't turn as she striped from the towel and walked into the water. I have only once seen her completely naked.

She placed her hands over mine, "Beautiful," she whispered.

"It's all right," I said. I wasn't impressed with the beauty of the moon. Her body on the other hand was a work of art. She curved in the right places with creamy skin stretch over a perfect frame. Her breasts were beautiful and full, rising up and down with each breath. How many times had I touched and felt them, laid my head on them to hear her heart beat. Her stomach was flat and smooth. My eyes couldn't be torn away.

"But I wouldn't use the word _Beautiful_," I said. "Not with you standing here in comparison."

She smiled raising her hand and placed it over my heart. Her cream and rose skin was pale in the light, just like mine. A scary reminder that one day she would be just like me. I didn't want to concentrate on that right now. What I wanted to concentrate on her body and the new feelings it was stirring in me.

I was trembling a little. "I promise we would try," I whispered. "If…If I do something wrong, if I hurt you, you must tell me at once."

She nodded, not saying anything for a second. Then she lean up towards me. "Don't be afraid, we belong together."

Truer words have never been spoken before. I wrapped my arms around her, holding her against me. I could feel the bolts of lightning shooting through me. "Forever," I whispered.

My lips finding hers as I pulled her into the water. She wrapped her arms around me as we sank into the depts. My breath becoming her breath.

Ever sensory in my body spring alive at once. There was something so wonderful, so right about the way her body was felt press against me, her heart beats echoing in my chest.

She pressed her body more tightly against me as I held her. My lips moving over lips.

"I love you," I whispered on her lips. She threaded her hands through my hair, pulling me closer into the kiss. I greedy took her lips again. I just can't get enough of her.

"Edward," she whispered my name as I moved my lips from hers and started down her shoulders. It was new way, a way that I offend thought about. All the time we experiment and practice; I never heard the whisper of my name like that.

I don't know about her but I was done with the swim.

I picked her up as I jetted out of the wetter and into the room.

I walked into the room, laying her on the bed. She had shut of the light before joining me, not that it made much of difference. I could see perfectly in the dark and with the moon's glow, it illuminating her skin.

She looked up me, trust me. Reaching for me, I grabbed her hands pulling them over head as I started kissing her at her earlobe. I kissed her lips, her eyes, her nose, her neck and every placed in-between. I could smell her scent becoming more portent, and smile.

"You don't know how good you smell to me right now," I whispered against her flesh. I knew what that smell meant now, and welcome it as she was welcoming me.

I lean down kissing her breast. When she was one of us I was going to spend a day just worshipping them, but with the venom I couldn't. I had to settle for the close mouth taste of them.

I did kiss them, and squeezed them. Smother my face in them. She gasped rising her body toward mine. I continued to kiss down her stomach until I reached her thighs.

The smell was most potent there. I wanted to go farther, to explore this smell, but didn't. The other side of me, the monster still was somewhat lose in my brain, and right now going nuts over that smell. He wanted to taste the blood of it more than anything.

"Edward," she said and with that the monster disappeared. Her worlds alone can bring me back from the farthest reaches of the darkness. She was my light.

She reached for me. I allowed her to bring me to her lips, enjoying the warmth of them. They always tasted like her blood, so sweat and seductive. I could feel a slight push before it registered in my brain what she wanted. I turned over, allowing her to take some control as she became bolder.

She was innocent at times, but other times she even surprised me. Her shyness was never around in closed doors. She was the first to make me realize what I wanted.

That I wanted more than what I was allowing at the time. I wanted to hold her like a women, taste her like a women.

"You are so beautiful," she whispered as she kiss and bite my neck.

I closed my eyes as the feelings came rushing towards me, pounding me at every angle. Unknown to her, she was starting to mark me. I couldn't let it happened until after she was changed. If she initiated it, I would soon follow and that would be disastrous for her. "Bella, don't." Tonight I couldn't handle it.

She stopped, looking over me.

"You always allow…"

I stopped her, with my finger.

"You don't know how erotic that is to me. When you bite me. I might not be able to control it now," I said.

"But I can kiss you there," she whispered.

I smiled as she pressed her lips on mine again. She continued the path down my throat towards my stomach, lapping up my stomach. Her tongue was soft, and I could feel her taste buds coming to life, each one tasting me.

With no one but her, I let out a growl that shook the house. I was an agony and in pain, and I as sadistic as it was, I wanted more. I needed more.

I had denied myself to long.

My eyes came resting back on hers, afraid that I scared her, but she looked smudged. She reached out and wrapped her fingers around my staff. My eyes rolled back into my head. It felt good, insanely good. She was shy at first and became bolder as she explored that area.

My arms skimmed around her thighs until it came to rest at the edge of her womanhood. "Open you legs, love," I said.

She did and my finger played on her mound first, feeling the smoothness of her. I rubbed my finger at her opening, enjoying the wetness of her.

It was an aphrodisiac for me. I move in out of her, her breath getting heavy, until she stopped doing what she was doing to me and was panting.

She moaned my name as she grabbed onto my skin. Holding on for her life as I continued to push her. Preparing her for me.

I pulled out her. I wanted to be inside on top of her when she finally came for the first time. I wanted dominance over her, she was mine.

"Are you okay, love," I asked as she was trying to recover from panting.

"Edward," she whispered.

"I'm here," I whispered.

"I need you," she whispered, still trying to catch her breath. Understanding what she needed, what I needed.

I rolled us over, so that she was on her back. Her eyes were closed and her breath was rugged. Her body was stretched out, like I had imagined millions of times. The brown hair spread out on pillow. Her lips slightly party as her breathe rush through them.

Boy fantasy.

"Isabella Cullen," I whispered. "Look at me, love."

She opened her eyes. I wanted to look into them when I enter her for the first time. To see them explode with the way I was feeling right now, to come alive with passion.

Her eye fluttered opened, looking at me with all the trust she had. They were glazed and happy. We were finally going to consummate the love we had. She reached up and wrapped her hands around my neck, encouraging me.

"I love you," she whispered. Her legs opening for me, to invite me into her warmth and wetness.

"You are mine for always," I slide into her, feeling, well whole. She closed up around me, taking me into her. I had never been able to get this close to her before and now I felt like I was part of her. She was tight and wet, but warm and felt like heaven, greater than her blood had ever tasted.

I was inside her, part of her. She was me and I was her. Whole. One.

My mind couldn't wrap around the concept because it was too cloudy with other feelings, love being the strongest. I was home. I was where I suppose to be. I was complete and satisfied.

I didn't know who was trembling more, me or her. I could see my eyes get wide in hers as the feeling of intensity rushed through me. I closed my eyes for second letting out a low pitch growl. I knew she couldn't hear, but she knew I was singing to her, calling her. She was now my life mate, my wife, my women, my other half, she was my everything. I opened my eyes again, looking down at her. When she was finally vampire, I would take the next step and mark her, but until than, the mark will stay unseen.

This was more incredible than drinking her blood. I couldn't describe it right, even with my vast vocabulary. She was everything.

She was still, too still.

Did I hurt her?

She put her fingers to my lips as if she could read my mind. "It supposed to hurt a little the first time, just give me a second." I held myself still as her body accommodated me.

I brushed my lips against hers. She ran her arms down my back and than did the most incredible thing.

She wrapped her legs around me, taking me deeper inside her. I always thought our skin was the most sensitive of our organs, but it wasn't. I could feel every lining, every muscle that made up her. I could feel her women juices flowing, warming me up. I have had my finger in her a couple of times, but it was dull to this sensation. "You feel good," she whispered, her eyes widen. "So good, Edward, please."

I felt good! She looked at me and for a moment I was lost in those eyes. I didn't care what she was thinking as long as she was thinking of me.

I started to move, gentle at first. Controlling the rhythm. In and out, each thrust sending electrical currents through my body. She moaned my name, holding on me. Her eyes opened and looking at me.

We were dancing as one, moving as one. Each stroke she gasped and took me, hugged me closer. Cried out my name a little louder.

But the rhythm was starting to take control of me and I couldn't stop. I didn't want to. She didn't want to. We moved like one, a perfect rhythm. Faster and faster, she held on. I held on. The night was exploding and taking us with it. I wanted more. She wanted more.

She kiss my neck frantically, sending a another wave through me. Her skin felt soft and hot against me, filling me up with her warmth, as our bodies rubbed together. Her sweet rubbing against me, our smell joining together. She was doing it again, allowing me to continue with the mating ritual. She was wild in my arms, and I loved it.

She pushed herself harder against me. Wrapped her self more tightly against me. Held me more tighter, and I wanted her. This is what we had been waiting for. The moment, the time was so right. We were finally together as one, as we should be.

And than we exploded, as I fought to keep from biting her neck. So many feelings were rushing at me at one I couldn't stop. I was singing, calling to her and her body was responding. I released myself in her as she climaxed. She cried out my name again and again. I buried my face into the pillow ripping it apart. Never in my years had I felt something like that. She clasped against the mattress her breath ragged and hard. Her skin was glowing, making her sparkle in the moonlight.

For a moment neither us could or wanted to speak.

We were as one, still connected, still together.

And thought it all, I hadn't been able to give her everything of myself. I wanted too, so bad. But tonight wasn't the time and the time was about her. I know in the farthest reaches of my soul she had given me every once of her being.

Given it to me, said yes to me.

The monster.

I loved her more for it.

"Are you okay," I asked. I wasn't sure I was.

She smiled. "Wow," she said. "That was…you were…amazing."

"The same could be said about you," I smiled back. Just being in her was amazing feeling.

All the time we 'played around', explored each other, tasted each other, were nothing to compare to that. That couldn't be put into words, and I wanted it again.

But I knew that couldn't be, she was human and tired out. She was fighting to keep her eyes open. "Sleep love," I said.

"Don't leave me," she said. I know what she meant and I rolled us over. Tonight for the first time we would sleep like lover do, with me inside her and her dreaming of me. She closed her eyes. "I love you so much Ed…" I smiled as her heart quieted and her breath stilled.

I looked at the ceiling, knowing I wasn't completely satisfied, I wanted more and more. But I would have to wait. I would have to wait until she was change, imagining what it would be like to finally make love to her over and over again, without worrying about her passing out.

"I love you, so much Bella," I whispered in her ears. Covered by her sweat, I felt beyond my wildest dream.

I pulled back, still inside her, to look at my angle. She had fallen asleep with grin on her face. "I love you, with all my heart, soul and being." I whispered. "Thank you."

***********************AUTHORS NOTES********************************

You asked for it, the honeymoon. This was a little harder to write because, what goes through a vampire mind during sex.

So I thought up some ground rules….First off Midnight Sun talks a lot about the venom and I thought that should play a big part. Translation, no open mouth kissing.

Second off, I took some mating habits from different animals, the singing, biting and other things to show how much Edward wasn't like us.


	10. Chapter 9 The Morning After

Rising Sun

Chapter 8 – The Morning After

_Nights, by the light of whatever would burn:_

_tallow, tinder and the silken rope_

_of wick that burns slow, slow_

_we wove the baskets from the long gold strands_

_of wheat that were another silk: worm soul_

_spun the one, yellow seed in the dark soil, the other._

- Eleanor Wilner

It was the single greatest night of my existence.

And I hated myself for it even the more.

I hadn't notice them at first, I was still revealing in our making love at the time. But they started showing up about an hour afterwards, marking her, laughing in my face and calling me the worse kind of fiend.

Bruises – they covered her body, a tell-tale sign of what I had done to her.

I wanted to call Carlisle; but was too ashamed to. What would he think, would he finally see how unworthy of those praise, that I was the worse possible fiend.

Bella slept, not moving much. Was she in pain? Knowing Bella she wouldn't say anything about it, brush it off like it happens all the time. She seemed peaceful enough, eyes closed as she snuggled closer towards me. After this I wouldn't be surprised if she finally pushed me away.

She had to see what type of Mephistopheles I really was and that we could never do this again.

The late morning sun was evading the room when she started to stir. The golden rays touched her skin making the bruise stand out again her pale integument. They almost glisten in the sunlight.

She didn't open her eyes but tightened her arms around my neck. I ran my fingers along her back being careful not to touch the bruises. They swirled, missing the patchwork of black and blues that scatter her backside, some of them a perfect replica of my fingers and hands.

She giggled a little, and it peak my curiosity. She had a tendency to have these private jokes with herself.

"What's funny?" I murmured, my fingers still traveling around her back. I could never get enough of the feeling of her skin. But that was going to have to do for now.

Her stomach growled. "You just can't escape being human for very long."

She was never hungry in the morning. She mostly ate breakfast out of habit. Emmett once had teased her on her food choices during lunch one time, calling it rabbit food. Bella had told him she doesn't call him Bambi killers so he shouldn't make fun of her diet. Later Em asked me if she was eating enough.

It was hard to tell, not remembering food much. Things we aren't around as much we have a tendency to forget about. I am still not a hundred bit sure how the toilet works.

I closed my eyes for a moment, drawling in my thoughts. How could I let this happen, I knew the risk, knew what I was capable of doing?

I didn't look at her, I couldn't. I couldn't face what I had done to her.

"Edward, what is it. What's wrong," she asked scared. Her voice changed instantly from a carefree manner to one of concern. I silently cursed myself, making the situation worse.

"You have to ask," I growled. I hated myself for doing this to her. She should anathematize me as well. I had hurt her, no better than that dog. He was right; I was going to kill her. I should have stayed away the first time. And above all, I hated myself for my weakness. She was the one temptation that I could never win against, my ultimate unforgivable sin.

I finally looked at her face. Her face was safe, there weren't much bruises there. I trace the worry lines. Her brows were pressed together, like she always did when she was fretting over something. I tried to smooth out the worry lines, as if it could erase all the monstrous things that I had done to her. I had made a promise to myself that she would never have to worry again, and less than 48 hours after I spoken those vowels, the worry lines had appeared on her face.

But what she was fretting over, I could only guess. I had to learn how to read her face, but was not perfect at. "What are you thinking?"

"You're upset. I don't understand. Did I…?"

Why did she have to always take responsibility? I knew this was dangerous, that I would end up hurting her. I am the one who was responsible. I should have been strong enough to resist her.

Not that I actually could.

"How badly are you hurt, Bella? The truth – don't try to downplay it," I said. I wanted her to rant and rave at me. Call me a monster. Finally understand what I could do her. Hate me even.

But she did the complete opposite.

"Hurt?"

Didn't she know? How could she not feel it? They were all over her skin, patchworks of purples and blues. Everywhere I touched her last night showed up in today display work.

She moved a little but didn't say anything. I could see in her eyes and face that she was growing angry. Did she finally see?

"Why would you jump to that conclusion? I've never been better than I am now," she said.

"Stop that," I said loudly, shaking the house.

"Stop what," she shouted back.

"Stop acting like I'm not a monster for having agreed to this," I said. Hate me damn it. Hate me as much as I hate myself.

I closed my eyes, not ready to face her when she realized.

I opened again to a very confused face.

"Look at yourself, Bella, Then tell me I'm not a monster."

She gasped, finally she understood.

"Why am I covered in feathers?"

Feathers? Oh yah, I tore into the pillows last night. when I wanted to bite her.I didn't realize how much damaged I did to them. Us and the room was littered with down feathers, like snow. If I wasn't so piss off with myself I would have found this funny. Her hair was covered with it, showing up against the brown waves.

"I bit a pillow. Or two. That's not what I am talking about."

"You…bit a pillow? Why?" was she laughing?

I grabbed her arm, trying to be as gentle as I could so I don't inflict more pain on her. My fingers fit perfect into the bruise that wrapped itself around it.

"Look, Bella! Look at this,"

She looked at for a second, studying it before she said. "Oh." That had to be the most nonchalant 'oh' I have ever heard.

"I'm….so sorry, Bella," I whispered. She sat there staring at the bruises with a puzzle look on her face. "I know better than this. I should not have-" make love to you, touch you, love you, stayed with you, thought myself even the slightest bit worth of being with you, I finished off in my mind. This couldn't be considered making love; I had somehow turned something so beautiful into something repulsive. "I am more sorry than I can tell you."

I covered my face in shame; waiting for her to scream, to call me every kind of monster in the book, to demand a divorce, and to hate me. But just sat there.

And like every action before, she did the complete opposite of what a normal human would have done. Instead of repelling me, she took me in.

I felt a soft touch on my arm before she wrapped her fingers around my wriest. She tried to yank it away, forcing me to look at her. But I couldn't. Call me a coward but I couldn't face what I had done to her.

"Edward," she whispered.

"Edward," she yelled.

"I'm not sorry, Edward. I'm…I can't even tell you. I'm so happy. That doesn't cover it. Don't be angry. Don't. I'm really f-".

She was going to say fine. I had to stop her for my own sanity. "Do not say the word fine. If you value my sanity, do not say that you are fine." I couldn't take much more than of this. She couldn't be fine. The tell tale makers were all over her body, mocking me. There was no way she could deny what had happened; it was posted all over her body. I had finally had done the unthinkable.

"But I am," she whispered.

I finally looked at her. Her eyes were filled with both angry and concern, if that was possible. What was going through her mind?

"Don't ruin this," she said starring down at me, her eyes growing a little angrier. Finally a normal response. "I AM HAPPY," She said pronouncing each would like it was its own sentence.

"I've already ruined this." How could she not see what I done to her? Did I somehow ruin her vision as well?

"Cut it out," she snapped.

I look away for a moment.

"Ugh," she yelled in frustration. "Why can't you read my mind already? It's so inconvenient to be a mental mute!"

My head snapped up, did I somehow damage her brain as well. "That's a new one. You love that I can't ready your mind." She never told me this, but I knew it. Maybe that is why I thought the need to always ask her what is on her mind. What she was thinking. For the last hundred years I have walked among both my and her kind, able to hear the most in depth thoughts in their psyche, but not hers. Hers was a mystery wrapped up an enigma, maybe that's why she surprised me as much with her thought patterns. They didn't make since because I was only allowed to witnessing what she want to show the world.

"Not today," she snapped.

"Why," my curiosity getting the best of me. I'll admit not being able to read her mind has made this relationship a lot more confusing. Even in the beginning, my confidence wasn't there when I talked to her because I didn't know if she was finding me repulsive or not. Or that she had figured what I was. I probably wouldn't have made as many mistakes as I did if I could hear what she was thinking instead of having to guess and resort to asking her.

She threw her hands up before smacking me. Or at least I think she was trying to smack me. I barely felt anything. "Because all this angst would be completely unnecessary if you could see how I feel right now! Or five minutes ago, anyway. I was perfectly happy. Totally and completely blessed out. Now-well, I'm sort of pissed actually."

Finally a normal response. I was starting to think she was incapable of them. "You should be angry at me." I said. Hated me damn it, because I hate myself right now.

"Well, I am. Does that make you feel better?"

"No. I don't think anything could make me feel better now." She was covered in bruises because I couldn't control my lust. She seemed to keep getting hurt every time she was around me. I thought this constant torture would be over as soon as we were married. But it wasn't.

"That," she snapped. "That right there is why I'm angry." Huh? "You are killing my buzz, Edward."

I rolled my eyes. Why was I surprise that the angry was directed at a different reason than the right reason? Emmett and Jasper continue to laugh at me as I stumble through this relationship. I felt so blind around her at times, like I was always in the dark. "That's how a relationship is," Carlisle had told me once, when I vented my frustrations on Bella response. "We aren't supposed to know what the other is thinking."

"We knew this was going to be tricky. I thought that was assumed. And then-well, it was a lot easier than I thought it would be. And this is really nothing." I can't believe she was writing this off. Why hadn't I reached the point of her infinity forgiveness? I had put her through hell in back more times than I care to remember. Keep putting her life in danger. Left her. Hurt her more times and she kept forgiving me. "I think for a first time not knowing what to expect, we did amazing. With a little practice.

She has got to be kidding me. I could feel my temper boil up and I knew it was because I was angrier with myself than her. But like before, she became the force in which I released it.

"Assumed? Did you expect this Bella? Were you anticipating that I would hurt you? Were you thinking it would be worse? Do you consider the experiment a success because you can walk away from it? No broken bones – that equals a victory."

She sat there taking it in. Her eyes looking at me understanding each out burst of anger as if it was complete justified, waiting for me to finish. I closed my eyes trying to get my temper under control.

She looked directly in my eyes when she finally spoke. "I don't know what to expect – but I definitely did not expect how…how…just wonderful and perfect it was." I could always tell when she was lying. Her eyes were very open and right now they were saying that she was telling the truth. Had somehow out of the atrocious act that I had forced upon her, she had found pleasure. That she had enjoyed it as much as I did? That would be impossible, yet the truth was. Her eyes dropped, but the blush worked it way up. "I mean, I don't know how it was for you, but it was like that for me."

I pressed a finger against her; bring her face to look at me. Was she worried that she hasn't pleased me. Of all the ridicules thoughts that had flown through her head. How could she not understand it was the most amazing thing I have ever felt? That any time I touched her I received pleasure and this just heighten it up.

"Is that what you're worried about?" I pushed the next thing through my teeth. The thought of it still disgusted me. "That I didn't enjoy myself?"

She looked at me with trusting eyes, holding for an answer. She truly was worried that my reactions this morning was based on the actions from last night to it. "I know it's not the same. You're not human. I just was trying to explain that, for a human, well, I can't imagine that life gets any better than that?"

Her eyes burred in to me, expecting an answer. "It seems that I have more to apologize for." I didn't dream that you would construe the way I feel about what I did to you to mean that last night…." There wasn't a word invented that could express what I had felt last night. "Well, the best night of my existence. But I don't want to think of it that way, not when you were…" I could even say the words allowed.

Her face lit up and she started to glow. "Really, The best ever."

I took her face between my hands, how soft and warm she felt there. "I spoke to Carlisle after you and I made our bargain, hoping he could help me. Of course he warns me that this would be more dangerous for you." I looked down for a second thinking back to the conversation.

_She wants to have sex, I all but blurred out two days after the whole Victoria thing had been put to bed. I had burst into Carlisle study. He was sitting on his favorite chair engross into a book. He didn't look at me. For a couple of minuets I just stood there, dumbfounded at the thought._

_ "I am not surprised," he said not looking up._

_ "What am I going to do," I asked. When I was nervously thinking I tend to pace. Emmett swears I dug a hole from here to Seattle when I was running each night (fast pacing) when I was trying to figure out how to handle the whole Bella situation. I know I was doing it now, but for two days I have been wrestling with this. Why did I ever agree to this? Because it will make her happy and this is what she wants. And you love giving her what she wants. _

_ "You know the mechanics of it Edward. You study the topic. I think you're a little old for the birds and the bees chat."_

_ "I am going to kill her," I said. I slumped down into one of the chairs, putting my head between my face. _

_ "Do you want it," he said putting his book down._

_ "More than anything, but not at the cost of her life," I whispered. The thoughts of what will happen had been running rapid through my mind. I didn't want her to know about it, it would just worry her more._

_ "I am just surprised you waited this long. Son, you have good control, better than you even give yourself credit for at times. You wouldn't hurt her. Maybe it is time for the talk."_

_ I picked my head up._

"He had faith in me, though – faith I didn't deserve."

She opened her mouth to speak as I pressed two fingers on it.

"I also asked him, what I should expect. I don't know what it would be for me. What with me being a vampire," I had to smile at the thought of Carlisle trying to explain to me the feelings of making love in scientific terms. Carlisle had never been one to express his feelings; maybe I should have spoken this part with Esme. He had done a poor job. This was so much more intense than he even could put to words. "Carlisle told me it was a very powerful thing, like nothing else. He told me physical love was something I should not treat lightly. With our rarely changing temperaments, strong emotions can alter us in permanent ways. But he said I did not need to worry about that part – you had already altered me so completely." She had in the most astounding ways. Her love had brought me to life, gave me joy beyond it being, opened myself that I could never retreat into myself every again. My family had been the first to notice the change in me. Alice said I seem happier and I noticed that Jasper wanted to be around me more. I wasn't so cynical about stuff anymore, more understanding, even more day-dreamily. She had force my eyes opened when I wanted to keep them shut. I now saw the world around me as a beautiful place.

"I spoke to my brothers, too. They told me it was a very great pleasure. Second only to drinking human blood." I thought about it. I had tasted her blood once and she was my singer. The one blood I couldn't resist. And that was pale in comparison to making love to her. "But I've tasted your blood, and there could be no blood more potent that that… I don't think they were wrong, really. Just that I was different for us. Something more."

"It was more. It was everything," she whispered. She was truly happy. The glow from earlier was back illuminating her. I wanted to take her than, lose myself in her, but I knew I couldn't. I had to resist for her sake.

"That doesn't change the fact that it was wrong. Even if it were possible that you really did feel the same way."

The glow went away. Great I hurt her feelings.

She looked like she was about ready to cry. "What dose that mean? Do you think I'm making this up? Why?"

"To ease my guilt. I can't ignore the evidence, Bella." How could I it was all over her lovely body. "Or your history of trying to let me off the hook when I make mistakes."

She grabbed my face, leaning forwards so there wasn't much space between her and I. 'You listen to me, Edward Cullen. I am not pretending anything for your sake, okay? I didn't even know there was a reason to make you feel better until you started being all miserable. I've never been so happy in all my life – I wasn't this happy when you decided that you loved me more than you wanted to kill me, or the first morning I woke up and you were there waiting for me…Not when I heard your voice in the ballet studio-or when you said I do and I realized that, somehow I get to keep you forever. Those were the happiest memories I have, and this is better than any of it. So just deal with it."

I reached out, trying to smooth the frown lines. This was our honeymoon and I was dampening it. "I'm making you unhappy now. I don't want to do that."

"Then don't you be unhappy. That's the only thing that's wrong here."

"You're right. The past is past and I can't do anything to change it. There's no sense in letting my mood sour this time for you. I'll do whatever I can to make you happy now."

She studied me for a moment, before accepting what I was saying. When I want to, I could lie to her. I had to learn how, in this lifestyle is always about the persona. You learn early to play the game, keep the secret. Our kind expects it. Any mess ups you had to take care off. I had lied to her more offend, always to protect her. But more offend I found her accepting what I was saying, but not really believing it. She had learned too.

"Whatever makes me happy?" She smirked a little and thankfully her stomach growled. I don't know if I could handle seductive Bella.

"You're hungry," I said getting myself out of bed as quick as possible. I grab a pair of draw string kakis and quickly put them on. As I moved a cloud of fathers stirred up, causing it to look like snow. If I wasn't so angry with myself I would have laugh at it.

"So, why exactly did you decide to ruin Esme's pillows?"

I didn't ruin them on purpose; it was in response to wanting to sink my teeth into her, marking her, making her mine. At least I have been able to control that part of my nature. "I don't know if I decided to do anything last night," I honestly said. I lost control plain and simple. If I had been in control last night, Bella wouldn't be covered by bruises. Looking away from her in shame. "We're just lucky it was the pillows and not you." I pushed a smile forward, promising myself I would be happy for Bella. Her happiness seemed to depend on if I was happy.

She slid carefully off the bed and stretched. I fully took in the damages.

I am a monster, the worse kind. I quickly turned from her, my hands balled up, trying not to take my anger and frustration out on anything. I hated myself more than ever. I had hurt her, something I had feared since the moment I laid eyes on her. I was no better than that monster in biology class the first day, thinking up how to lure her away from the safe of the classroom and those children.

"Do I look that hideous?" she asked. I couldn't answer that, yes she did. She was covered with black and blues. I had used her body with very little care.

She walked into the bathroom. For a couple of minuets it was quiet than I heard her groan. She had finally been able to see the full extend of what I had done.

She was standing in front of mirror, surviving the damages done to her. I stood behind her, watching in the mirror as she study each and every bruise and than touched her hair.

"Bella?" Please tell me what's on your mind.

"I'll never get this all out of my hair!" she said trying to pull the fathers out of her head. My Bella would pick the one thing that seemed insignificant to the world and be upset about her.

"You would be worried about your hair," I said helping her pull the feathers out her hair.

She was laughing and smiling, making me hate myself more. Why couldn't I be as happy for her sake? "How did you keep from laughing at this? I look ridiculous," she laughed. I wish I could join her, feel the same way.

I just keep concentrating on pulling the feathers out of her hair.

"This isn't going to work. It's all dried in. I'm going to have to wash it out," she signed. Than turned to wrap her arms around my waist. I know I was responding to her, I had to get away from her as soon as possible or I was going to lose it. "Do you want to help me?"

How could she still want me after this?

"I'd better find some food for you," and quickly disappeared out of the door at vampire speed. I couldn't face her body, wanting it so much or her eyes knowing that she would be disappointed.

I walked into the kitchen as I heard the shower turned on. I just needed a couple of seconds to get a hold of myself. I leaned on the counter, putting my head into hands. At that moment I wish I could cry. I felt like I wanted to.

Bella and mine relationship had always been built on an untraditional foundation. While I played it safe, she ran head long into things. She knew I was a vampire, yet insisted that we could have a normal relationship with normal rules; even after she fully understood that her blood was like heroine to me. And I had a feeling that she wouldn't allow a couple of bruises to stop her from having a real honeymoon.

So how was I going to discourage her? She would never see it my way.

She floated into the kitchen, her skin glowing. Carlisle once accused me of running away when a problem got to hard. Not this time. I would face this one head on.

I quickly made her in omelet, knowing she likes eggs. I never put much time into thinking about how humans prepare food. But since Bella, I can honestly say the kitchen has become somewhat of my domain. Emmett has joked once that I had become whipped. This is coming from a guy who follows Rose around like a puppy.

"Here," I said happy that I could at least do one thing right.

Usually Bella is a slow eater, but she devour them, not even letting them cool down first. I didn't realize that she that hungry. Actually I had never seen her that hungry.

"I'm not feeding you often enough," I said as she cleaned her plate. Most of the time when I made eggs, she only ate half of them.

"I was asleep. This is really good, by the way. Impressive for someone who doesn't eat."

"Food Network," I said, smiling at her. I was glad she thought my food was at least good.

She smiled back at me, I could do this. I could be happy for her. I would do everything in my power to make sure she enjoyed our time on the island. When she was less breakable and back to her old self; I would take her on another honeymoon to make up for this one.

"Where did the eggs come from?"

"I asked the cleaning crew to stock the kitchen. A first, for this place." Carlisle fusspotness on having everything look as if a human lived here paid off. We had a state of an art kitchen with refrigerator.

She eat another omelet or more like ingurgitate it down. She must be running low on energy.

Thank you," she told me. She leaned across the table to kiss me. My automatic response was to kiss her back; it just came natural to me. But I stopped myself, I was too wound up right now, and that kiss would lead me to a place I wasn't allowing myself to go.

She stopped and out of now where, "You aren't going to touch me again while we're here, are you?"

I hesitated for a moment, making sure I was in control and than I softly stroke her cheek. This was safe, I think. She lean her face into my palm, closing her eyes.

"You know what that's not what I mean," she said.

"I know. And you're right," I said being honest with her. "I will not make love with you until you've been changed. I will never hurt you again."

Somehow I had a bad feeling, like all my other promises. That one is going to be broken too.

*********************AUTHOR NOTES**********************************

Sorry about the delay, two papers due at the same time, not fun.

Not much to say on this chapter, just a little bit of what was going through Edward's mind at the time.

Fusspot means someone who is a stickler on things being perfect. It was a popular term back in the Edwardian times (when Edward was kid).


	11. Chapter 10 The Begining of the End

Rising Sun

Chapter 8 – The Beginning of the End

_With snow-white veil and garments as of flame, _

_She stands before thee, who so long ago_

_filled thy young heart with passion and woe."_

- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

It became my goal for her to enjoy this honeymoon as much as possible. And I'll admit it; I did everything in my power to wear her out in the process, because if she was too tired, she didn't have to think about the one thing that was missing from the honeymoon.

It wasn't really too hard. Bella wouldn't admit it, but she enjoyed the great out doors as much as I do. We had explored Forks and the surrounding woods during our courtship. We found hidden valleys, rivers and forest. We had climbed to the highest canopies and gazed at the stars in the sky (when weather permits it).

This island wasn't much different. We snorkeled, hiked, swam and even sail. I gave her, her first lessons the third day we were here, it surprise me that she was a natural. I even joked with her that she had been lying about growing up in a desert.

We saw parrots and dolphins – most that stayed away from me. During those times we talked too. Talked about the past and the presents, she had expressed the love of traveling and there were places I wanted to take her to. We argue and debated music and literature. She expressed an interest in to attending college, when she was ready.

Before it seemed like there was never enough time to be with her, that I seemed to share her with the universe. But here on the island she was totally mine. I didn't have to worry about some outside influence taking her away, dividing her attention.

We talked a lot about her becoming a vampire; I was still surprised that she had a lot of questions about it.

"Do you think I will remember any of our time together," she asked one afternoon as we lay out in the hammock, our feet brush the water. The warm air was making it sway ebb and flow with the tides.

"There are things that I remember about being human."

"What happens if I forget about you, us our time together," she asked studying my hand. I could see the glistering off, bouncing the lights on her face.

"Than I would court you all over again," I said. "I would take you to the same place for our first date. Take you to our meadow and tell you all about being a vampire. I would go with you to prom and force you to dance."

She laughed. "And give me dirty looks the first day of biology."

"Well I would hope you would forget that."

"I wouldn't want to," she said honestly.

"You wouldn't," I had to ask, thinking back to that first day of biology with her. While I sat there trying to not kill her, she thought I hated her for some strange reason. It was first of many misunderstanding between us. If I were to court her all over again I defiantly have done things different. I don't know how but would have.

"I might not have understood it at the time, but you were trying to protect me," she said turning to face me. "Now that I understand why you were acting like that, I can now appreciate it."

I never thought of it like that. Each mistake had been a learning point for both of us, building something stronger. I couldn't promise I would never make another mistake but I could promise that I would try harder and trust her.

Nights were a different matter. I really didn't think my plan through. The problem was she was sometimes so exhaust that she fall sleep in during dinner. I had to be the one who changed her and got her ready for bed. It wouldn't be a problem if I was trying to avoid any contact with her naked body.

Plus, I had to sleep with her. The temperature was too hot for her not to have my cold body press against her. So while she sleeps soundly through the night, I sat up in agonizing over what was being pressed up against me. How come her blood never tempted me after the first taste like her body?

I was in pure misery during the nights.

And to make matters worse, I had allow Alice to do the packing and each night the lingerie keep getting more and more inviting. Alice had known my taste enough and what looks good in Bella to pick out some of the most incredible pieces. And I would have enjoyed it fully if I wasn't trying to do the right thing.

One night, about a week later, we went to Rio to listen to Samba. I had some CD back home, but there was nothing like listening to the pure rhythms being played lived. She had asked me a lot of questions about the music, and trying the best I could to explain it to her without using a lot of terms. I had study music all my life, my mother was actually a famous opera singer in her youth, so I had grown up around music.

When I started out, I wasn't very good, but was persistent I became better. With indefinite time on my hands I became somewhat of a perfectionist.

We walked along the streets, holding hands; we looked like a normal couple. She was dressed in a cute little dress that seemed to flow on her. An Alice original, a honeymoon present as she puts it. To her, Bella was a new model, a new inspiration. Her body type was completely different from Rose and Alice was in her glory.

Bella seemed to be more confident in that dress; she had more of sway to her hips. Which haven't escaped the noticed of the local men. They had kept their distance, most of them having some clue on what I was, plus a few growls here and there had helped.

I wanted her to experience the world as much as possible as a human before she sees it through a vampire's eyes. I had been to Rio once, with Carlisle when he was in the mist of purchasing the island. It had been almost seventy years ago, when the music was still being just played on the streets. I remember watching a couple of people dance to it one night, lost in the movements.

I had fallen in love with it because it likeness to Jazz.

We had stopped at a local place that had been recommended to me by the cab driver. He had pointed it out as we flew through the streets towards the docks. The place was actually a little hole in the wall, but according to Bella had the best Brazilian food that she has ever tasted.

"You had Brazilian food?" I asked as she finished up the _frango com quiabo._

"No, but I did eat a lot of Mexican food back in Phoenix," she said.

"Taco Bell is not Mexican food."

"Actually it wasn't Taco Bell, we had a small Mexican Restaurant near my house, it was kind of fun because they didn't speak English and we didn't speak Spanish so mom and I weren't always sure what we ordered."

"You think you are going to miss food," I asked. I forgot that food was supposed to have a taste. To me it just didn't smell or look editable.

"Not really, I don't eat much."

"Yah, kind of notice that one," I said. Her usually lunch was yogurt, a sandwich or a salad and diet coke."

We finished up and walked around a bit. "You seemed to be eating more," I said, surprised that she finished all that was ordered.

It seemed that her diet had taken a curve lately and she was eating much more. Mostly eggs. Maybe being out of the damp air had done her some good.

After dinner we strolled around the shops, we still had another hour left before the place we were going to was opened. She stopped for a second to look at something in one of the galleries windows.

"You like it," I asked. She had never shown that much of an interest in art. There were some pieces in the house that she had mentioned that she liked. But as many art galleries that we went to, she never stopped at piece like that. The colors were a lot bolder than my taste, but I could see what she found so appealing. She liked bright colors, the pieces that she did like in the house seem to be on the brighter side.

"It's happy and warm."

"Romero Britto, he is a pretty well known pop artist. I went to one of his showing when he was in California." This must be one of the main galleries that showed his pieces. I smiled and usher her in. "Go pick out a piece."

"Edward, these are probably originals."

I raised my eyes. "You do know every single piece we have in the house is an original."

"Are you sure," I could see in her eyes that she was eyeing one with the couple on it - Heart Kids. She hadn't been used to spending money on a whim, unlike us. She thought through every purchase more than once. It wasn't like we were frugal, but there was certain things we like to indulge in, fast cars, well made clothing, art to name a few. Esme would be delighted if we sent a couple of piece from Brazil. She had hinted on it, when she had started the project.

The gallery owner came over to us, very interested in the fact that we have been staring at one of paintings for a long time. He was used to clients of all different nature; from those who were just tourist taking a peek to people like me brought souvenirs like this home.

He greeted us in Portuguese; I smiled and returned the favor.

"You want that one," I whispered in her eyes. She nodded her head, not taking her eyes off the piece. I smiled; she was finally letting me spoil her.

"We can probably pick up a print somewhere," she said, not taking her eyes off this one.

I rolled my eyes, she had a lot to learn about being a Cullen and one thing is that we don't own prints. The three Picasso, four Dali, a Monett, two O'Keefe and a Montgomery plus a bunch of undiscovered artist made up our art collection and probably could revival some of the top museum collections. That wasn't including our own private collections. Each of us had personal pieces too – except Jasper. Poor guy for the life of him couldn't figure out what was so fastening about staring at a picture on the wall.

A couple of minuets later, Bella owned her first real piece of artwork.

"I guess it is useless to make a big deal about you purchasing it."

I laugh, I could get used to her allowing me to spoil her.

She reached up and kissed me on the check. "Thank you," she said. "But we could have bought a print."

"And make me the laughing stock of the household, I think not. Plus it holds a fond memory for you."

"I don't think Jasper would say anything," she said.

"He's color blind," I said walking towards the bar we were heading to.

She stopped dead in her tracks. "Vampires can be color blind."

We head back near sunrise; she had curled herself into the bench with the one of the blankets. I had a feeling she was going to sleep today for the most part. But by noon she was up, wanting to go for a swim.

We played in the surf and walked along the beach. Her bruises had but all but faded out of existence, by now. She seemed happy, but sometimes I would catch her looking at me with a type of longing I could feel. As much as I wanted what she wanted. I had to be the strong one; Bella just gave into me too easily. She has since the beginning of our relationship. She was a strong independent person, who just happened to fall in love with the wrong guy.

I had heard the thoughts of our classmates, on how over protective I was. I seemed like a tyrant, controlling her. And I know she had suffered in silences when she couldn't answer the questions that had been directed at her by her parents or friends. She held on to our secrets stronger than I could imagine. Protecting us from the world's accusations.

And that had won that place in each of our hearts, and I knew that they would fight to the death to protect her. She had gone from being Edwards's girlfriend, to being a part of the family.

We had moved out of the white room into the blue room. The cleaning crew wasn't due to arrive until the next day, so until than, the white room was off limits.

Tonight had to be the worse in the lingerie department. It was black and lacey, bringing out the cream and rose colors of her skin more. It hung in places it should be illegal to hang and invited me in the worse way.

I caught the smirk as my eyes popped open. She noticed it. For the last week I have been trying to keep my admiration to myself in hopes to discourage her, but she kept getting bolder and bolder. She was stubborn.

"What do you think," she said pirouetting.

"You look beautiful. You always do," I said. I am going to kill Alice when I get back. She had to know that this was going to happen. She was probable having a good laugh at my expense. What I wanted to tell her was she looked dangerously sexy, but I didn't want to encourage her. Next thing I know she is going to be declaring that it was too hot to sleep with something on; at lest the nighty covered her up… somewhat.

"Thanks," she didn't sound happy as she climbed into bed. I put my arms around her, pulling her against me, and getting ready for another night of torture.

She closed her eyes as I turned off the lights. "I'll make you a deal," she said.

No way. These deals don't always end in her best interest. "I will not make any deals with you."

"You haven't even heard what I'm offering."

"It doesn't matter," I said. I wasn't going to be tricked into anything.

"Dang it. And I really wanted…Oh well."

She said the three magic words. I knew my other half was winning. I had long ago realized and accepted I would never be able to deny her what she really wants. I just lucked out that she was too innocent to have gotten what she wants, because I would have caved in by the first day.

"All right. What is it you want?" Damn it she was smiling. The little minx. She wasn't as innocent as I thought, or she was learning how to seduce me. Either ways, this could be dangerous.

"Well I was thinking…I know that the whole Dartmouth thing was just supposed to be a cover story, but honestly, one semester of college probably wouldn't kill me," she was throwing a bone at me on one of the things that I really wanted. For her to experience college before going vampire. "Charlie would get a thrill out of Dartmouth stories, I bet. Sure it might be embarrassing if I can't keep up with all the brainiacs. Still…eighteen, nineteen. It's really not such a bid difference. It's not like I'm going to get crow's feet in the next year."

Why did she have to do this? Throw the one bait she knew I would take. And I knew I couldn't last a couple of months. A week or two, no problem – but a couple of months was asking too much. I would cave and cave hard before than.

"You would wait. You would stay human?"

I was getting angry, she wasn't playing fair. She had all the hands and I was being dealt nothing.

"Why are you doing this to me?" I could feel my temper rising. Wasn't it torture enough that I had to lie next to each night, knowing what was there? Had once taste the forbidden fruits, to become additive to it. And now being denied it. "Isn't it hard enough without all of this?" I grabbed a handful of lace around her thighs._ Stop it Edward, this isn't her fault. You have to learn she is human ruled by her emotions. _I took a deep breath, still mad at her and myself. "It doesn't matter. I won't make any deals with you."

"I want to go to college."

"No you don't. And there is nothing that is worth risking your life again. That's worth hurting you."

"But I do want to go. Well, it's not college," she said honestly. "As much as it's that I want – I want to be human a little while longer."

I closed my eyes, trying to get my temper in check. "You are making me insane, Bella. Haven't we had this argument a million times, you always begging to be a vampire without delay?" How many arguments, including prom. Now she decides as soon as I finally agreed that I would do it, that she wants to be human. Emmett and Jasper right, female species was hard to understand.

"Yes, but…well I have a reason to be human that I didn't have before."

Why do I not like this is where this was going. "What's that?"

"Guess," she said dragging herself off the pillow to kiss me. I kissed her back trying to keep my passion in check. If I didn't kiss her, she would get hurt, if allowed myself to get lost in that kiss; I would end up regretting it.

I sometimes amazed myself how much control I have on my body because right now I was about ready to say to hell with, roll her over and give into the temptation. But I was able to fight it.

After giving her enough time that she wouldn't be hurt, I pulled away and cradled her against my chest. "You are so human, Bella. Ruled by your hormones." I had to laugh. Humans couldn't be count to do the correct thing, when their hormones run wild. Years of high school had taught me that one.

"That's the whole point, Edward. I like this part of being human. I don't want to give it up yet. I don't want to wait through years of being a blood-crazed newborn for some part of this to come back to me."

It only last a year, love. Bella understood this from a human perspective where time actually had meaning and mass. In my world it was a completely different story. Time had no meaning, it was pointless. We were unchanging so was our world. We exist day in and day out without time affecting us. I wasn't going to push it anymore tonight. In a couple of weeks she would understand.

"You're tired. Sleep, love." I said and started to hum her lullaby. She curled up more closely to my body. I would put up with the torture tonight like every night, just to have her safe and happy by my side. Well safe and a little less happy – maybe I should enjoy the nights while they were still here. Soon she wouldn't be carted off to dream land.

"I wonder why I'm so tired," she muttered sarcastically. "That couldn't be part of your scheme or anything." How well she knew me. I chuckled and went back to humming.

"For as tired as I've been, you'd think I'd sleep better," she whispered.

I stopped, a little surprised. "You've been sleeping like the dead, Bella. You haven't said a word in your sleep since we got here. If it weren't for the snoring, I'd worry you were slipping into a coma." After almost a year of sleeping with her, I became somewhat of an expert on her sleeping patterns. I know that she usually talks before slipping to a deep sleep and still tosses a little during rain storms. But for the last couple of nights she has been knocked out cold, no moving, no talking, no waking up. I was starting to think my plan was working.

"I haven't been tossing? That's weird. Usually I'm all over the bed when I'm having nightmares. And shouting."

"You've been having nightmares."

"Vivid ones. They make me so tired." She yawned. 'I can't believe I haven't been babbling about them all nights."

I thought she was finally done with her nightmares. I thought by bring her here she found peace in her sleep.

"What are they about?" It wasn't like her to not to talk about them.

"Different things – but the same, you know because of the colors,"

"Colors?" She lost me. I might be calling Carlisle.

"It's all so bright and real. Usually, when I'm dreaming, I know that I am. With these, I don't know I'm sleep. It makes them scarier."

"What is frightening you?"

"Mostly…"

"Mostly…"

"She shivered a little and whispered "Volturi." I knew that wasn't the completely truth but I also learned when she was ready she would tell me. I hugged her tighter, as if I could protect her from them and her nightmares.

"They aren't going to bother us anymore. You'll be immortal soon, and they'll have no reason."

Something was passing through that mine of her. She was worrying about someone else. "What can I do to help," feeling helpless?

She shook her head, "They're just dreams, Edward."

I wish I could buy that, but her dreams seemed to mirror what was going on in our life.

"Do you want me to sing to you? I'll sing all night if it will keep the bad dream away." I offered.

"They're not all bad. Some are nice. So…colorful. Underwater, with the fish and the coral. It all seems like it's really happening – I don't know that I'm dreaming. Maybe this island is the problem. It's really bright here."

Says the girl who grew up in a desert.

"Do you want to go home?"

"No. No, not yet. Can't we stay awhile longer?"

"We can stay as long as you want, Bella."

"When does the semester start? I wasn't paying attention before."

She was okay if she still was torturing me. I started to humming, luring her away to dreamland. She quickly fell into a move less sleep.

When I was sure she was safe in dreamland, I detangled myself from her and reached for my phone. I stepped outside, keeping my eyes on her sleeping form. She didn't move, which was strange. Sometimes at night I would get a book from her shelf and I noticed that she would move in her bed to be closer to me. As Renee put it once, readjusting herself to be closer to me. I took a deep breath and dial the phone.

"Is something wrong Edward," Carlisle asked.

"I am not sure," I said running my hands through my hair. I hope I haven't disturbed him. If work wasn't pulling him away, I was with my constant worrying over Bella. I said something to him and he just laugh, saying that it was payback for what he put me through with Esme.

"Okay, take a breath and tell me."

"She's having nightmare but isn't moving."

"Nightmares? Is everything else okay?" I didn't want to answer that, because I know what he was asking. Was I able to control myself.

"Yah, I guess. Look Carlisle she usually moves around a lot and very vocal when she sleeps but she been sleeping like the dead."

"Anything else in her normal patterns."

I thought for a moment. "She eating a lot…We went through almost six cartoons of eggs here. She seems more tired than normal. She is also having mood swings."

"Let me do some research, Edward, it might be nothing. Just keep an eye on her and let me know if anything is changes in her habits."

I hung up the phone not totally satisfied. There was nothing Carlisle could do at this point. He was a thousand miles away and couldn't examine Bella body. But I could.

I held two medical degrees and I knew her body too well. Even though I never practice, I have kept my license up dated. I walked back in, hoping she was a sleep and pulled back the top part of her nightgown. She moved a little. I ran my hand over it, trying to see if I felt anything different.

Our hands were so sensitive; the slightest abnormality would trigger it. I kept running through the list in my brain of possibilities. Listening to breathing, it was fast but even. Her lungs sound good to, no extra fluids. Her blood smelled the same, so nothing was wrong with her blood. Her breast seemed a little more swollen than before, but other than that, her skin seemed to be in good order. She also put on a little weight, but I figured it had to do with all the eggs she was eating.

I leaned down listening to her heart. It was normal, a little fast for her to be sleeping but I just wrote it off as the humanity in the air. Maybe it was my imagination.

I did have a tendency to pull things out of proportion.

Maybe this place was messing me as much as she claim it was doing to her.

I settle back into bed. Taking comfort that she was in my arms and that she was safe and nothing could hurt her.

She sleeps more soundly than before, but I couldn't tell if she was having a good dream or bad one.

Or dreaming at all.

It was much later when she woke with jolt. She was breathing hard, gasping for each breath. I never seen her like this, when she usually woke out of nightmare, she was coherent as if part of her was still back in the dream world. She came right wake.

"Bella?" I tighten my arms around her and shook her gentle. Making sure she was awake and not sleeping.

"Oh," she gasped again. Than out of the clear started to cry.

"Bella! What's wrong." I touched her face, wiping her tears away. The more I wiped the more they flow.

She was shaking and crying. "It was only a dream." What had happened in that dream to cause her to cry like this?

"It's okay, love, you're fine. I'm here," I said taking her in my arms and rocking her gentle. "Did you have another nightmare?" I held onto her tight as she buried her face into my chest. "It wasn't real. It wasn't real"

"Not a nightmare." She said shaking her head. She pushed back tear. "It was a good dream."

Not too sure to know what to do. "Then why are you crying?"

"Because I woke up," she wailed, wrapping her arms his neck and sobbed into my throat.

I have learned one thing in this relationship is trust Bella to do the complete opposite of what she should be doing or think. Her feeling and emotions were all backwards.

I tried to not laugh, hoping the situation would smooth itself out. I never had seen her come out of dream with that much emotion.

"Everything's all right, Bella. Take deep breaths."

"It was so real," she continued, "I want it to be real."

"Tell me about it. Maybe that will help," I said leaning back taking Bella with me.

"We were on the beach…"she trailed off, sitting up right. Her eyes were red making her eye color even more pronounced.

"And?"

"Oh, Edward," she looked like a new set of tears were forming.

"Tell me, Bella," I said now worried. This wasn't like her at all.

She clutched her arms around my neck and locked her lips with mine, taking me by surprised. She was pushing all her desires and need into that kiss and for a moment I was giving in. My control was getting less and less, as I fought with myself. I knew I was losing. I could never win a fight with her involved. I lost the first time when I tried to stay away from her. The persona I pushed on her to scared her away didn't work and she had become the undoing of me.

I struggled to hold her away, a part of me wanting to say the hell with it. She wants it you want it. Stop fighting it.

I had to do the right thing, once in our relationship. I finally broke free, my better half winning this round, but weak. I don't know how much longer I could do this.

Maybe it wouldn't be such a bad idea to change her now. _No stick with the plans, Edward, everything in due time._

"No, Bella." Please stop doing this to me I can't keep fighting it.

Her arms dropped as the tears started to spill again. Why was she doing this to me?

"I'm s-s-s-sorry," she struggled to say the words between the tears. Had I hurt her again by my rejection, didn't she understand that I was doing this to keep her safe?

I took her into my arms again, hugging her tightly. How can I make her understand I want this as much as she did, but she was too important to me? I would never be able to live with myself if something had happened to her.

"I can't Bella, I can't!" I moaned. I can't keep fighting this, especially if we both want it.

"Please, Please Edward." I knew at that moment I had lost. If she would have asked me for my head I would give it to her, if she had ask for the stars I would bring her one and she asked me to make love to her and I will. I closed my eyes feeling weaker than I ever did.

I pulled her under me as I took her lips, giving in. I wanted her too much to fight it anymore. I need her to much. I could easier deny myself blood before I could deny myself her love.

I needed the warm of her arms had to offer to make me forget. I will always be addicted to her.

She was my own personal heroine and I would keep coming back to her, I needed her. Her body had become more of an addiction than her smell had ever, and I wanted it all, needed it all.

She welcomed me in. I came home.

The pillows didn't suffer this time around; it was the 17th Century French headboard. Esme is never going to allow us to come back.

*****************AUTHOR NOTES***************************************

There is some debate over when exactly Ness was conceived. For all tends and purpose, I am going with the first night. My reason is that in the book, it does mention that Bella thinks that Ness is the reason behind those strange dreams she has on the island.

Like a lot of this story, there are extensions. I figured that knowing Edward, he would want to go to Rio to listen to music and give Bella some human experiences.

Samba is considered by some forerunner of modern Jazz. Edward grew up during the birth of Jazz and the Blues and it is mentioned in the Twilight that he had a Jazz CD in his stereo the first time Bella visit.

Like Jazz, Samba has it's beginnings in Africa and mixed with the sounds of Europe. It is a pure Brazilian dance (the type you might see at carnival time). It begin in the late 19th and early 20th century.

Romero Britto is a famous Brazilian neo-pop wall decorator, painter, serigrapher, and sculptor. He combines stereotyped elements of cubism, pop art and graffiti painting in his work. He is known for his contemporary work.

Jasper and his color blindness came to me during a discussion with a friend of mine. At the time, my friend who was born color blind, had an operation that helped his eyes see color. He had a hard time figuring out colors, because unlike the rest of us, he had never learned his colors. I thought it would be fun for Jasper to be the same way. As a human, Jasper was color blind, and when he was turned, his eyes were able to see color.


	12. Chapter 11 Pratice makes Perfect

Rising Sun

Chapter 11– Practice makes Perfect

_And thou art dead, as young and fair_

_As aught of mortal birth;_

_And form so soft, and charms so rare_

_-Lord Bryon_

I really hated myself.

Why is it that I could never trust her?

Or myself?

I closed my eyes for a moment, gratifying in our love making. I could spend the rest of my existence lost in this moment. She was curled on my chest smiling, having slipped into a demination that I could not go. Along with her quiet breathing I could hear the flowing of the ocean as it played on the sand. The sounds were relaxing, allowing me to calm myself and for me to reflect.

I was an idiot.

She was sleeping deeply now, lost in her dreams. She talked once, calling me her Edward and smiling. I reached down and kissed her. "I love you Bella, too much at times."

She smiled not saying a word and I wasn't sure she heard me.

About an hour later, I checked her body, ready to face any consequences of our actions. But to my surprise there were no marks, if it was for the yellow marks, I would have thought what had happen was only a figment of my worse fears come to life. Her body was the same; I even turned on the lights to make sure I wasn't missing anything.

I learned how to control it.

I wanted to shout, to dance to do some sort of display for the feelings I was illuminating, but could….I would wake her up.

I kissed her again, wanting to laugh and kick myself at the same time. I hadn't hurt her. I somehow learn to channel everything, to focus it onto another point – Esme headboards. All this worrying and avoid any kind of sexual pleasure had been for nothing. Practice, that all we needed, I should have realized.

Kissing had been a challenged at first, especially her reactions. The times that she remembered to breath, she would literally attack me. But as our relationship grew, we learned how to control it, or at least what to expected. She would still get dizzy, but that was because of the venom. I couldn't control that. I could control myself enough to stop when I felt it had gone too far and I could feel the monster approaching. I couldn't fully kiss her. Not until after she changed, but I still can enjoy her lips and her skin to a point.

At times I was jealous of my brothers and their relationships. They didn't have the restrictions that were implemented in Bella's and our relationship. They didn't have to think about each moment they are with her. Each touch, each kiss was like a pendulum swinging back and forth, threaten to get closers.

And the more I feared it, the more she would want it. Even if she didn't say a thing, I saw the disappointment flash through her eyes when I had to pull away. Jacob had pushed that into my face that he didn't have to pull away when he kissed Bella, that he could give all of himself. It made me feel worse, more than I was already feeling. I could never be a complete man for Bella if she stayed human.

But nether could I leave her – I had tried that once - almost killing her and me. We needed each other to survive, since day one. She was my other half and like it or not either I had to become a human or she had to become a vampire. The vampire argument had finally won. Alice vision was coming true.

And as much I hated to admit it, I wanted it to happen – for me. It would be the only way to keep her. But to ask someone to voluntarily become part of this life – I knew better than anyone else the struggle my family has with this way of life, that none of us asked for this or would have wanted it.

But Bella had been different, she understand more than I thought she did and wanted it. Well, now she wanted sex more – she was a human. I think if she had her way the first night she knew I was spending with her, it would have happen. Not that she is that type of girl. But for the simple fact that she understands what we have isn't something to take lightly. Human search and die without finding their soul mate, but at the tender age of seventeen she looked across a noise cafeteria and found hers.

I looked down at her, peacefully sleeping. I hadn't always thought her beautiful – she had this quiet beauty that seemed to grab a hold of you when you lease expect it. And it had. I had spent countless hours when she was awake or sleeping watching her. Sometimes she would notice but most of the times she didn't.

Now I wonder what she would look like as a vampire. I knew she would be beautiful – it was part of allure. But what human features would she loose and what would gain. We became a family after the change. I had met Carlisle once when I was sick, but I wouldn't say we had an adequate conversation. Even Esme had known Carlisle for a little while before she was turn ten years later. Bella would be a whole different experience. We had known her as a human; had stories about her. I knew her quarks, her likes and dislikes, how her laughter sounded and her tears taste. I knew what it was like to pull that warm body up and kissed those breakable lips.

We always thought we didn't lose much of ourselves when we turned. Forever stuck in whatever mood we were in before the change – but could it be that we become different. I hate to think that I might lose the things I love best about her – her intelligent mind, her caring nature, even her stubborn streak.

It was part of the reason why I didn't want to change her; even though Carlisle had reassured me a million times that I wouldn't loose them. She would be my Bella – just less accident prone.

I lay back down, taking her with me. Part of me will always debate the morality of my choice – or lack of it. Our greatest arguments have been over weither or not I have soul. I had grown up in religious family for the most part. We went to church and I had gone through all the rites of passage that any Catholic boy would have gone through. But when I was changed I had turned my back on God as I thought he had turned his back on me. Carlisle always saw this lifestyle as a way of doing good in the world. They were some of our best debates.

I had spent almost a hundred years with this thought processes, until that faithful day in the cafeteria. Now I wonder if somewhere in my quest to prove that God did turned his back on me, was I being proven wrong. Bella swears she is not overly religious, never really attending church, but she doesn't believe in the damn either.

Where I saw a monster, she saw beauty.

I must have really knocked her out, because it was about a good twelve hours before she even started to stir. She had laid really still trying without any luck, to fool me into thinking that she was asleep. I was going to have to tell her that her breathing pattern and heart beat changes when she is awake.

She was stretched across my chest and my hands were behind my head. I had been staring up at the wooden ceiling for the last two hours just thinking.

She pulled her self up on her elbows, looking guilty.

I wonder why?

"How much trouble am I in?"

I wanted to laugh, but kept that under control. "Heaps." I turned to look at her, and smile. I felt good, I had control it. I could give her a proper honeymoon without hurting her. I was going to owe Esme new furniture, but that I could live with.

And starting right now, I was going to make it up to her, every moment I had to pull away, every time I had denied her. No more trying to ware her out, well I was going to still do that, but it would be the proper honeymoon way.

"I am sorry," she breathes. "I didn't mean….Well; I don't know exactly what that was last night." I wasn't sure either, but it worked.

"You never did tell me what you dream was about," I said. I was still kind of curious to what brought what happen last night on. I must have done something incredible in that dream for her to want to make it reality.

"I guess I didn't – but I sort of showed you what it was about."

She was dreaming about that. Wow. I wonder if all the other times she had said my name, her dream were like that in nature.

"Oh," I couldn't help it, I was in shock. "Interesting."

"It was a very good dream," she murmured turning beat red. I just stared at her lost in the though. "Am I forgiven?"

I'm trying to stop from being shocked and she were worried if I was mad at her. Her no, me yes. Why couldn't I just trust her, I would have spent the last week in heaven instead of hell.

"I'm thinking about it."

She sat up looking at herself, but as soon as she moved she fell over. My Bella, the eternal klutz. One thing I am going to miss about her, so is Jasper and Emmett. Their favorite thing to do is now bet on what Bella would trip over. But I got to admit; only she would make klutziness graceful.

"Whoa…head rush." She laughed.

I took her back into my arms, making sure she didn't hurt herself.

"You slept for a long time. Twelve hours," I whispered.

"Twelve?" she looked at me in shock. I would have to wake her up in two more because the cleaning crew was due here at three and I wouldn't want them to think I killed Bella and left her corpse on the bed. She ignored me and gave herself a quick once over, hoping I wouldn't catch it.

"Is the inventory complete?"

"The pillows all appear to have survived."

"Unfortually, I can't say the same for you, er, nightgown." I said nodding over to the end of the bed. I had torn that one off in a mater of seconds. But I did decide between hour three and hour four of her sleeping that all her sweats were going in the garbage when we get home. I was going to put a new rule in our relationship; she is only to wear langeria, especial black lacey numbers, when we are alone.

"That's too bad, I liked that one," she said a little sad that I had destroyed it. I smiled, good.

"I did, too," I said. She had no idea how much. I was going to have to phone Alice sometime and tell her what I wanted. Or knowing Alice I wouldn't have. She probably has a whole slue of them waiting for me.

"Were there any other casualties," she asked in a small voice.

_Other than my sanity_. "I'll have to buy Esme a new bed frame," I said nodding over to the bed frame.

"You'd think I would have heard that."

"You seem to be extraordinarily unobservant when your attention is otherwise involved." This was coming from the same girl who had me pegged at what I was before I knew it.

"I was a bit absorbed," she blushed again, deeper than before.

"I'm really going to miss that," I said. It wasn't what made her blush on how she looked during the blush. The red seemed to pick up the colors of her eyes and hair it make them more brilliant.

She looked down at me for a moment. Her brows drawling together in their usual worries. "

"How are you feeling?"

The happiest man alive. I had made love to the most incredible woman in my existence and didn't hurt her. I laughed, I was that happy. I felt like I could float away at any moment.

"What?" she demanded looking at me confused.

"You look so guilty – like you've committed a crime," I laughed. She was just too funny.

"I feel guilty," she muttered.

I rolled my eyes. "So you seduced your all-too-welling husband. That's not a capital offense," I teased.

Her cheeks became even redder. I locked that look into my memory; it would be something I always treasured.

"The word seduced implies a certain amount of premeditation," she said. She was planning this to happen. If she wasn't, she would have been in T-shirts and sweats. I am just surprised she didn't go the 'I am too hot for even the almost see-through nighty route'.

"Maybe that was the wrong word," I said, not really believing it. She might be innocent on some levels, but she knew how to get what she wanted with me.

"You're not angry?"

I guess I had that one coming, figuring the mood I was in the last time she woke up after our love making.

"I'm not angry," I smiled again.

"Why not?" She was pushing for the answer – which was I was wrong, all we needed was a little practice, you were right.

"Well," I paused trying to think of a way to say it without admitting I was wrong. I was starting to believe Emmett, once you married you stop being right. "I didn't hurt you, for one thing. It was easier this time, to control myself, to channel the excesses." I looked at Esme damaged frame. She was going to kill me. "Maybe because I had a better idea of what to expect." All the medical knowledge I had, had mean little during the act itself. It sounds simple enough on paper, insert yourself into hole, move around in hole, take yourself out. But the emotions that happen during the time you are in hole are incredible. You stop thinking, stop reasoning and just are. No medical book, no poem, no song has ever been able to described what I had felt like. What it was like.

The second time around had been better, but I also knew what I would be going through, and as the emotions took over, I was ready for them. I still had to hold myself back a lot, but I have been able to give her pleasure without hurting her.

"I told you that it was all about practice," she said with a hopeful smile. She was all but itching to say, I told you so.

I rolled my eyes; somehow I got a feeling I am not going to live it down.

Her stomach started growling, stopping my thought process.

"Breakfast time for the human," I asked. A private joke between us, but somehow reminded how truly far apart we were.

"Please," she said, hopping of the bed. She started to stumble, not quiet getting her balance. I had to move at vampire speed to catch her.

She had a bad sense of balance, but not that bad. It was like she had no coordination or equilibrium at all.

"Are you all right?"

"If I don't have a better sense of equilibrium in my next life, I'm demanding a refund," she declared, marching ahead. I watched her head into the bathroom. Was she putting on weight?

She cooked this morning, frying up some eggs. She has been eating a lot of eggs.

"Since when do you eat eggs sunny-side up?" I asked. She was more of the omelet and scrambled type of person. Actually I have never seen her eat eggs sunny side up.

I was kind of proud that I knew the difference, complete different from the first time I had seen her make breakfast. Back than I had now idea on what humans ate –let alone for breakfast. When I decided to learn how to cook, I became a butt of a lot of jokes between Jasper and Emmett.

"Since now," she said.

"Do you know how many eggs you've gone through in the last week?" I wouldn't say eggs were here favorite food, but I never seen her eat as many. Yogurt, yes – in fact we keep some at the house for her. It was normal for her to be walking around eating yogurt.

I walked over to the trash can to show her. In it had to be at least a dozen blue egg cartons; pilled in with other things, surprisingly no yogurt. In fact she hadn't touched it since we got here.

"Weird. This place is messing with my appetite," she said, taking another bite of her eggs. She didn't even let them cool. "But I like it here. We'll probably have to leave soon, though, won't we, to make it to Dartmouth in time? Wow, I guess we need to find a place to live and stuff, too."

Dartmouth? I figured that went after last night. Did she think that there was some barging in it?

I sat down next to her, pulling her close to me. "You can give up the college pretense now – you gotten what you wanted." Not that I was going to complain, but still I know her well enough. Enough to know that Dartmouth was her way of getting me to sleep with her again. "And we didn't agree to a deal, so there are no strings attached."

"It wasn't a pretense, Edward. I don't spend my free time plotting like some people do," she snorted. "What can we do to wear Bella out today," she said in the worse imitations of my voice ever. "I really do want a little more time being human."

She leaned over to run her hand across my bear chest and whispered in a very seductive "I have not had enough." I might not be able to read her mind but I knew where her thoughts were heading, and I would be following in a matter of minuets.

"For this," I said catching her hand moving it down my stomach, enjoying the warmth of it. "Sex was the key all along." I had to roll my eyes, to think of all the arguments we had over the vampire/human issue only to find that I could have just given in the first night. "Why didn't I think of that? I could have saved myself a lot of arguments."

She laughed, "Yeah, probably."

"You are so human," I laughed. Always ruled by her emotions, even though vampires' emotions are more intense than a human; at the same time, ours don't change as quickly.

She blushed again. "I know."

"We're going to Dartmouth? Really?" I asked not sure if she was just teasing me.

"I'll probably fail out in one semester."

"I'll tutor you," I couldn't help it. Somehow through this whole mess, I was going to get time to spend with her human. It would be rough, but maybe she will see this is the natural order of things. She would get a chance to experience things that she should have. "You're going to love college."

"Do you think we can find an apartment this late?"

Another confession time. "Well, we sort of already have a house there. You know, just in case." Emmett usually acts as our realtor, since he seemed to have a better understanding of real estate, land and the market. He has scouted out some good locations, including Forks.

"You bought a house?" She was probably going to kill me when she sees how big it was.

"Real estate is a good investment," I shrugged. I owned a lot of properties, we all do. We didn't like hotels that much, so when we were planning on visiting a city we just bought a place. There weren't too many cities in the United States or abroad that we didn't have at least one piece of property.

Plus our next move out of Forks was going to be New Hampshire anyways. We usually started East and worked our way West, so that by the time we past an area again enough time has gone by that we wouldn't be recognized.

She decided to give it up. "So we're ready then."

"I'll have to see if we can keep your 'before' car for a little longer…" I trail off, wondering how I was going to convince Rose to let me keep it longer than the allotted time.

"Yes, heaven forbid I not be protected from tanks.

Looks like Emmett won this bet.

"How much longer can we stay?"

"We're fine on time. A few more weeks if you want. And then we can visit Charlie before we go to New Hampshire. We could spend Christmas with Renee…" Not that that was one of the top priors on my list, since it would be our first Christmas together. But I knew she only had limited amount of time with her mother before she would have to say goodbye for good.

I think it would give her more time, plus what is one more years to us. Esme was a good three years older than Carlisle and it didn't make that much of difference in the long run.

I know the vampire issue will have to be addressed eventually, but that could wait. Right now I just wanted her to be happy.

"A few weeks," she agreed. She smiled, "So I was thinking – you know what I was saying about practice before?"

I would have taken her up on her offer if I didn't hear the boat approaching. The cleaning crew was here. Than again on the other part of the island was this area that would be very secluded and very, very far away from the humans. A plan was forming in my mind. "Can you hold on to that thought? I hear a boat. The cleaning crew must be here.

She smiled.

"Let me explain the mess in the white room to Gustavo, and then we can go out. There's a place in the jungle on the south –"

She put her foot down. "I don't want to go out. I am not hiking all over the island today. I want to stay her and watch a movie."

I would have protested it, but she looked so funny and serious, like the little kitten that was standing up to the tiger, that I decided to let her have her way.

"All right, whatever you'd like. Why don't you pick one out while I get the door," I said heading towards the door.

"I didn't hear a knock."

At once there was a knocking sound. I have amazing hearing. I could hear a two people whispering to themselves across a football stadium, with that stadium being filled. It took time to learn how to focus on different sound, but once you master it, it can work to your advantage. Carlisle thinks it is one of the reasons why he has one of the advantages over other doctors. He can hear sounds that the body is making, the pulsing of blood through the veins, the beating of the heart, the intake of oxygen, the release of carbon dioxide, the electricity running through the brain and even the birth and death of cells. Two people, making up as much noise possible as they walked up to the house, weren't that hard to pick out.

I opened the door to find two small, round Brazilian, Gustavo and his wife Kaure waiting for me. Gustavo family has been taking care of the house since Carlisle bought it, and was paid very well for their trouble. He smiled, we talked small talk. His wife on the other hand was eying me suspiciously. Esme had warned me about his wife.

"She is Ticuna Indian," Esme said one night as she was explaining me about the caretakers of her island. "Like the Qulitiean, they have their own stories about us."

"You think she knows."

"I think she has some clue. She watched both Carlisle and I on our last visit very casually. I think she understands she is to keep her mouth shut."

_Libishomen_, her mind whispered. Her eyes were wide with fear. Another legend that formed around the dead ones. This one involving beautiful women being snatched in the middle of the night by vampires. We had dealt with humans who have a clue to what we are – and the best way is to brush it off and not pay attention to it.

I lead the couple through the house, explaining what needed to be done. Kaure wide eyes darted from me to the door.

Gustavo mind was on the recent soccer match between Brazil and Portugal. He was wishing he had bet his cousin a little more money on the match.

I lead them into the living room where Bella was fettling with DVD player. In Portuguese I introduced both of them to my beautiful wife. She took Spanish in high school and for a person who grew up in dominated Spanish speaking part of the United States – her Spanish was very limited. But I guess she understood somewhat, because she blushed.

Gustavo smiled at her, but Kaure mind was going so fast. She was fearful of Bella, praying to God that he would save her. Bella looked at me, she might not hear the human mind, but she picked up things faster. She had seen the oddities in me and my family before anyone else at school and she only knew us for a couple of weeks, unlike the rest of our classmates who went to school with us for almost three years.

I quickly ushered them out the room and into the white room, explaining them to them the best way I could that I we had broke the pillows. I didn't go into detail that I had bitten into them when I was making love to her.

I left them, finding Bella watching me in the front room. "What is with her," she said. She picked up on it. I wasn't too surprised. She was observant, too much at times. She saw what other didn't want to.

"Kaure's part Ticuna Indian. She was raised to be more superstitious – or you could call it more aware- than those who live in the modern world. She suspects what I am, or close enough," I explained. Most of the modern world doesn't believe in the existence of things that go bump in the night. They lived in denial of what could be right in front of their face. It was one of the reasons we had gotten away with our lifestyles. The kids at Fork High were more wired into what Brittany Spears did last week to really understand that there had been a group of vampires going to their school.

But those who held onto the old ways were more suspicious to us. Quilitian were one, especially the older people of that tribe. They knew the signs to look for, so as the rest of the world write off our oddities as being odds, they were seeing the warning signs. And even though modern humans were still afraid of us, they just didn't understand why.

"They have their own legends here. The _Libishomen_ – a blood-drinking demon who preys exclusively on beautiful women."

"She looked terrified," she said, concern for Kaure.

"She is – but mostly she's worried about you."

"Me?"

"She's afraid of why I have you here, all alone," I chuckled darkly. Part of her assumption was true. But what had bother me was the part of the impregnating her, as if I could. "Oh, well, why don't you choose something for us to watch? That's an acceptable human thing to do."

"Yes, I'm sure a movie will convince her that you're human," she laughed as her arms encircle my neck. Somehow the movie was the farthest from either of our minds. She leaned up to reach my lips, as my arms tighten around her and lifted her off the floor so I didn't have to bend. She was light in my arms, a perfect fit.

"Movie, schmovie," she muttered as my lips moved down her throat, taking in her sweat smell. Her smell was beckoning me, a completely different way.

_Mother Mary of God_.

I put her down quickly enough not to hurt her. Kaure stood frozen in the hallway, feathers in her black hair, and a large sack of fathers in her hand. The look of horror was stretched across her face. Realizing what the position looked like, from the outside world. She thought I was feeding.

She recovered her self quickly when she saw that Bella was okay, a little dizzy but okay. She apologies quickly, and told her it was alright. I didn't blame her, if you didn't know my relationship well, than the mistake could have been made. Throats were where we drink from, it was incredible that I could more than just kiss Bella there and not sink my teeth in.

Kaure quickly walked away, her mind frozen with fright. She had guessed particularly right. I was a vampire but I hadn't spirit Bella to this island for dinner.

"She was thinking what I think she was thinking, wasn't she," Bella muttered.

I had to laugh, my brothers, Esme and Alice had made the same assumption when the first time they caught me kissing Bella neck. I couldn't help it, I would have thought the loud moaning and heartbeat would give it away that she was actually enjoying it.

"Yes."

"Here," she said handing me the first video that she picked out – _Seven Brides for Seven Brothers_ to me. "Put this on and we can pretend to watch it."

"Very honeymoonish," I said, not one of my favorite, I wasn't the type who like those happy go luck musicals that Esme adored. I was more for the rock operas and more realistic stuff myself.

We snuggled on the couch as the actors sang their way through one annoying song after the other. Bella was enjoying it. She like the theater, I found that one out on one of our first dates. We went to see _Phantom of the Opera_, which had been a personal favorite for me. Not only was the music really incredible – but I had grown up backstage at those opera house. My mother had almost retired from performing by the time I was six, she was a major patron of the Chicago Opera Society and had preformed from time to time. The story brought back fond memories of that time.

She loved it, crying in the end. As we walked back to the car, she said she was a little disappointed in Christian.

"Why?"

"Well, why didn't she pick the Phantom, I found him more appealing than boring Raoul."

"But it suppose to be a tragic love store," I said. "You know guy with gift falls for girl, tries to win her and than gives her up for love."

"I don't know if it was me I would have chosen the Phantom, she just took the easy way out. Raoul was safe."

I had rolled my eyes at that comment, not knowing how much it would come back to hunt me. Jacob had been her Raoul, the safe chose, but she had decided on me – the Phantom. The person who could never given her the normal life.

I kissed her forehead, thankful for whatever flaw that made her the way she was.

"Will we move back into the white room now?"

"I don't know…I've already mangled the headboard in the other room beyond repairs – maybe if we limit the destruction to one area of the house, Esme might invite us back someday."

She smiled, "So there will be more destruction?"

I laughed, it still amazed me that she still wants me, freak in all. "I think it might be safer if it's premeditated, rather than if I wait for you to assault me again."

"It would only be a matter of time," she said. I knew she was right, she would found a way to get her way, I can deny her nothing.

Her heart was racing, but for a reason this time it had a strange echo to it. Maybe this place was messing with my brain too. "Is there something the matter with your heart?"

"Nope. Healthy as a horse." She paused, looking at me strangely. Maybe it was the island. "Did you want to go survey the demolition zone, now?"

"Maybe it would be more polite to wait until we're alone. You might not notice me tearing the furniture apart, but it would probably scare them."

"Right. Drats."

I felt the same way, but I knew I terrified poor Kaure more than I wanted to, and if she walked into us. The poor lady might have a heart attack. Plus I wanted to be alone, not having to worry about anything but how many different ways I can kiss her.

The movie ended with all seven brothers happily married, by the time Gustavo and Kaure were done. Gustavo was happy; he might make it back in time to catch the last part of the match between Spain and England. He had money riding on England.

She was starting to fall asleep when Gustavo came to tell me they were done and wished a good night. Kaure eyes were still wide, starring at Bella.

"They're finished."

"So that would mean that we're alone now?"

"How about lunch first," I said as I could hear the juices in there empty stomach turning.

She sat there for a moment deciding what she wanted. Hunger won out.

"This is getting out of hand," she complained finishing up the eggs. Again with the eggs. Was there some egg eating disease that I didn't know about.

"Do you want to swim with the dolphins this afternoon – burn off the calories," I asked, hoping there was another way she wanted to burn off calories.

"Maybe later. I had another idea for burning calories," she said.

"And what was that?"

"Well, there's an awful lot of headboard left-"

Before she could finish I had her up in my arms and in my bed, silencing her with my lips.

******************AUTHOR NOTE**********************************

Not much to say in this chapter, except sorry for taking to long.


	13. Chapter 12 Reflections

Rising Sun

Chapter 12 – Reflections

_Under a heaven of cedar boughs: the drouth_

_Of love was on her lips; the light was gone _

_- Percy Shelly_

"Wow," she whispered.

"I couldn't say it better myself," Losing myself in the smell of hair. I could hear the heart beating heavily against my chest. It echoed in my chase, allowing me to feel for a moment that I was human, that I had a beating heart. Her arms lingered on my back before traveling up my spin to my hair. They gently messaged my hair.

Our cloths were lying in a pile; most of them rip beyond repair. Sitting closed to her during that movie had been torture; she kept rubbing her dairy air against me. A couple of times I almost kicked Gustavo and Kaure out. My mind hadn't been on the movie, but on her body and what I wanted to do with it.

How did my siblings do this, get through the day with being with their love ones and not tearing their cloths off and making love to them right there in front of everyone. This was going to be hard; I am not going to have my fill of her, even when she became a vampire.

She brushed the hair off my eyes. Her breath hitched a little, but her fluttering heart beat was slowly slipping back to normal. Her eyes fluttered close for a moment and than she jerked herself. I smiled a little, knowing that she was tired and soon I would loose her to dream world.

I rolled off her, lying on my back taking her with me, tucking her neatly against me. I stared up at the ceiling, trying to claim myself. Everything was aflame right now.

This is what our honeymoon should be. I was still going to do another honeymoon once she was turned and ready, maybe here again. But I am glad I could give her a proper one right now.

But something had peak my curiosity – she has been experimental since the clean crew had left – where did she learn this stuff.

"Can I ask you something?"

She looked at me and nodded. Her breath was still catching in her throat. Her body was glistening with her sweat sweet that I longing to lap up. Would it taste like her tears, salty and sweet?

"Not that I am complaining, far from it. How did you ….come up with."

She was blushing, hiding herself in the mattress. She understood what I meant, but for the life of me I couldn't figure it out. Bella never read tabloid romance novels and even the slightest hint of sex would turn her redder than a radish. "There was a book in your suitcase; I didn't mean to look at it I was looking for something when I came across it."

"The _Karma Sutra_," I asked. Emmett had gotten it for me as a bachelor present. "You'll thank me later," he said. I didn't pack it because I knew it would embarrass Bella. I didn't know that he actually packed that thing, unless he slipped it in before my Martin was handed to me. She shook her head, not many people know about it.

"Sorry, Em," I said. Trying to explained, knowing his teasing was going to get a whole lot worse once we got back. He had been holding back, being polite.

"That's okay, I want to learn how to pleasure you," she whispered still embarrassed. After all that we been through, all that she has done and been done to her. She still had the ability to blush.

"You do, more than you realize," I said. "That's nothing to be ashamed of, love. We're married; this is part of married life. I just didn't want you to get embarrassed by Emmett that's all. He means well."

She looked down and than back up at me. "I have kind of been reading it, when I am in the bathroom," she said.

"And," I asked.

"Well, I wouldn't mind trying out some of those posses with you," she said into my neck. I wouldn't mind either, there were a couple that I found most interesting.

"I tell you what, why don't you pick out a couple and we will try them while we here," I said. My blushing bride was a tiger in bed, another surprise that I wasn't counting on. "Maybe invent some of our own," I said.

Her eyes lighten up; I could see was beyond happy.

"You mean it."

"I haven't given you the proper honeymoon, so now I have to make it up to you, plus there is a lot I want to do," I admitted.

"Like what," she asked.

"Make love to you on a beach, in the water, under the water, in a tree, all over the island. I want to take you back home and make love to you in our meadow, in the rain, in the sun. I want to make love to you in car, on a boat, on a plane and the bathroom."

"Join the mile high club," she laughed.

"I want to dress you up in the finest lingerie from France," I said leaning down. "And I mean the risqué stuff. And undress you. By the way, love, new rule, you are not to wear any more sweats to bed."

She laughed, "Okay, as long as the no shirt rule is still in effect,"

"Mine or yours," I asked.

"Both," she said.

"I think I could live with that."

We laughed and than she finally looked at me, tracing her fingers around my eyes very gentle. "You look hungry," she whispered.

"I'm okay, Bella," I said. I haven't hunt over two weeks and the elephants had long ago been digested. I knew I should go, but I didn't want too. Not now. Going means I have to leave this world, where Bella and I were together, that we weren't human and vampire, but just husband and wife. I didn't want to leave that.

"You starting to get crabby," she said. I closed my eyes as her hand ran over them. Feeling the warmth she gave to me. It had been the first oddity she had noticed about me, the darker my eyes, the more crabby I was.

"That's not the reason I was crabby," I said.

She studied me for a long time and than started to laugh. "I am not the cause of that either."

"Yes, you are. You and Alice and all those nighties, and your body, and just being so sexy." She was the cause and the release of everything I had been feeling for the last couple of days.

She leaned up on her elbows looking down at me. "What does Alice have to do with you denying yourself this? I think you're the most self denying vampires I have ever known."

I kissed her, "And you know a lot of vampires."

"It seems all I society myself with lately, that and werewolves. But why are you blaming Alice."

"Because I should have never allowed that hyper active pixie lose on your packing. I shudder to think what she is doing to your wardrobe."

"My wardrobe?"

"You're a Cullen now, which means that you are now under Alice jurisdictions when it comes to what you wear."

She groaned, tucking her head in my chest.

"Don't worry, I told her to add some jeans and t-shirts to the wardrobe."

"My hero," she said kissing my chest. She yawned, and I knew I would soon loose her to dream land. "I guess I am not the only one going to kill her when I get home."

"No, I just wish I hadn't been so stubborn to enjoy it," I admitted. Lucky, it was the only one I had destroyed was the black one. She still had a weeks worth of nighties and lingerie.

"I'll give you a fashion show when I have more energy."

"I'll like that," I said.

She picked her head up, and looked at me for a moment. "Edward, why didn't you believe me when I said I wasn't hurt?'

I closed my eyes for a moment, trying to figure out how to say this without it ending up in a fight. "Bella look at it from my point of view. I know I can hurt you, even though you think I am incapable of it. I live with that fear every moment I am with you, one slip, one lost of control and I can easy kill you. In the beginning, when our relationship was first starting out, as much as we struggle with it, you seemed to understand. Than things changed – you wanted more, I wanted more – and I couldn't give it to you." I stopped for a moment, trying to regain my composure. She laid there quiet, waiting for me to continue.

"If we were a normal teen couple we would have progressed by now. Had sex, or experimented with it. And I hated myself for it, wanting it but not at the cost of your life, but you kept pushing. Even when I tried to run away, you didn't allow it. You came after me, even when you thought I didn't love you. You risk your life to save me. Than our wedding night happened – and I lost control, maybe not enough to kill you, but enough to cause bruising. But the next morning instead of hating me, instead of being disgusted with me, you loved me."

"I am not good for you Bella, I keep hurting you over and over again," I said. She opened her mouth, ready to deny it and I pressed my two fingers on it. "I love you, to much for your own good." She smiled and pressed her lips on my fingers. "And that love will never change."

"I am not an overly romantic girl, Edward. You know that. I had lived too much with having to be the grown up to dream of fairy tale princes and castles. But the moment I saw you across the cafeteria that day, I somehow knew I was your destiny," she said. "I never had a boyfriend, let alone kissed a guy, until I met you. Your not suppose to met your soul mate at seventeen, who does. But there you were. And I would follow you to the ends of the earth if I had too."

"I know that it is far stretched sometimes, but you have to believe me, when I tell you I am okay," she continued. "That night was the greatest night of my life and each time it gets better and better. And I wanted to share that with you Edward. And yes I know there is a lot that you are holding back, and I am looking forward to the day you can finally kiss me whole and make love to me fully. But I know what is in here," she said touching my face. "And what beats in here." She said touching my chest. "And I know you have the capabilities to control yourself. I just wished you would believe it too."

"You're my first relationship too, Bella. Every moment I have loved and feared." Each experience in this relationship we had shared, first kiss, first heartbreak, first makeup, first time. We had been both virgins that night, and I honestly would have stayed if she hadn't come along.

"It's not over Edward."

"No it's not," I said.

"And no matter what we face, I will always love you. Through the good and the bad. I will stand with you."

I kissed her lips, "And I will stand with you."

"You know, one of the days you were out because of the sun. Lauren said something derogatory about you. I got so angry I kind of yelled something across the cafeteria."

"Really, what?"

"I yelled that at least my boyfriend was a good kisser."

I laughed. "That's why Lauren kept looking at my lips and wondering how that was possible. Boy I wished I was there for that. So you actually bragged about my kissing abilities." I was thrilled, thinking about the look on Mike's and Jessica face.

She shook her head. "You are a good kisser, even if you are holding yourself back."

I kissed her lips, letting them linger there. "Yep a good kisser," she said yawning and putting head down on my chest.

A couple of minutes she was in dreamland. Maybe I should do a quick trip to the man land. I knew the smell was starting to get painful, and I didn't want a slip. Plus the way she has been sleeping, she probably wouldn't know I was gone.

I detangle myself from her. I could be back before early morning. I put on a pair of kakis and shirt before finding some stationary in the desk.

I'm hoping you won't wake and notice my absence, but if you should. I'll be very soon. I've just gone to the mainland to hunt. Go back to sleep and I'll be here when you wake again. I love you.

I turned it over an addressed into Mrs. Cullen.

The ride to the mainland, gave me time to think about some things. I remembered clearly the first day I saw her. School had become somewhat routine by than, having graduated over and over again. We weren't planning on going to high school in Forks, but Jasper had decided it was time to try the whole mingling in with humans again.

Two years, freshman and sophomore years flew by, on one great monotone. Forks High wasn't anything special, they had the same classes, same student body, same teachers I have seen over and over again.

I hadn't been all that happy with Jasper; we had our rough patches, mostly because of the whole affair with Alice. But he was determined to make it through for Alice sake.

I personally thought we were pushing Jasper too much. Unlike the rest of us, he had been the stuff of what human nightmares were made out of. He had spent too many years being able to satisfy his needs, to all of a sudden stop. Even though we were both about the same age – our life experiences had made us two complete different people. That day had been like any other, we got ready for school, we walked in, time to play our rolls.

I hadn't really been paying much attention to the new girl, just another shinny objects to get the human males all worked up. I had seen her image past from one human mind to another, nothing was special about her.

Or at least I thought. The first thing I found out about her was for some strange reason she was mentally mute to me. Her mind was closed, shut and locked tighter than Fort Knox.

I had turned to stare into a pair of chocolate brown eyes, who weren't from the person who was calling me. I could hear the world around her, but not her, as Jessica told the tale of the Cullens.

It was later that day when I would get hit with the second thing – the smell.

The mouth watering, earth shattering smell that almost drove me to comment murder smell.

I had been able to control myself, and get myself out of there as fast as possible, but not before I had to encounter that smell again. It still hit me like a ton of bricks from time to time, but I learned to control my reaction towards it.

Time went on and my hatred turned to curiosity, my curiosity turned into infatuation, and my infatuation turned into love – or at least it did in a mater of days. I was falling so quickly for her, that I hadn't even realized it. It took Alice pointing it out and then challenging me to leave, until I came to the sad conclusion. I was hopelessly, unconditional and irrevocably in love with Isabella Swan.

I wasn't ready to admit it by than. I was still trying not to kill her, but Alice saw it and was excited. That day all I could think about is her smell, her mute mind and protecting her from myself and all the vicious thought processes there was.

Later on, when we were dating that I noticed other things about her. During the time she was in caste, she put up with a lot of innuendos being thrown at her. Lunch became somewhat of a mixture of sensations. Emmett and Alice had insisted on sitting with us after the whole Arizona incident, saying she might as well get used to us. To my surprise, it wasn't only Alice that she took a shinning to, but Emmett as well.

Rose ignored her, even though Bella tried to be nice to her. And Jasper didn't know what to do. At first he wasn't too happy with a human knowing our secret and being in an open relationship. Jasper had lived through to much not to be.

She won Jasper over soon enough.

The more she sat with us, the more confident she became with us and I noticed that she wanted to spend more time with us than the human. This started to disturbed me.

On days that were sunny, I stayed by the school, watching and protecting her. She had insisted that she needed to go to school – Jasper and Emmett both back her up. It would look strange if she missed the same days that I did.

Lauren asked her why it was that Cullens were always yanked out of school on sunny days.

"Hiking I think, Carlisle is a big out doors type," she said not looking up from the book she was reading.

"Mike thinks that their part of some weird experiment that would probably explode in the sunlight," she said smuggled. I wanted to kill her. Lauren had been the worse of her so called friends, about our relationship. Lauren was a lot like Rose – she was used to being the pretties, until Rose had enrolled. Her resentment of Rose on top of the fact that this new person had caught my eyes, made her more vicious than ever.

Bella had tough skin, she learned to take it.

Bella just rolled her eyes. "Yes, and Mike also believe his is God gift to woman. No Lauren there isn't a weird experiment; they are a very unique kind of family that believes in spending quality time together, very strange in American culture."

Lauren puffed away, going to the next girls to hurt. Bella returned to her book. When the bell rang, instead of heading inside with the rest of the children, she waited and walked towards the woods.

"I know your there Edward Cullen," she said.

"I going to kill both of them," I said, leaning up against a tree.

"No your not," she said wrapping her hands around my waists and holding me tightly. Breath in that mouth watering scent, allowing it to calm me down. The world never seen right when she was away from me.

"You shouldn't have to lie about us," I said trying to forget my frustration at what had happen.

"I am part of your secret. I don't care what they think. I know the truth and the reason why."

"You still shouldn't have to lie,"

"What do you want to me to say next time, that my boyfriend is a vampire whose skin is the most beautiful thing in sunlight, like a million sparkling diamonds. And he would have shown up for school but he probably would have blinded you with the light he creates."

There were other things I noticed also about her as time went by. Alice had been right, they had become best friends.

Than there were the other times, when we were alone and I could forget that we were worlds apart.

I once had tried to do the noble thing, and leave her. I never told her about this, but the night of her birthday, after the whole incident with Jasper. I had laid there thinking it would take only one bite. I had taste her blood before and been able to stop, it wouldn't be any different. I could pull back, and I wouldn't have to worry about losing her sedulous vampires or members of my own family. In that weak state of mind, I almost did it. For one reason, I wanted to keep her. I left her, destroying my own happiness in replace of allowing her to have a whole life.

She was the stronger one in the relationship, the one who had fought back, tried to be strong. She had been the one brave enough to return to me. And I knew the moment she flew into my arms, I wouldn't be able to do the noble thing again.

Than to add to the world that was against us – Jacob who had been a mild annoyance, like all the guys from school, had become a major player in her life. One that wouldn't go away. He kept pushing himself on her. And the greatest betray happened shortly after she agreed to become my wife. Jacob had attempted to kiss her a couple of times, and she had struggled to get free. But the last time, she kissed him back. The memory will always be a painful scar in my mind.

I realized my greatest wish and fear had come to be. She had been given the alternative. If she truly craves the supernatural, Jacob could give her that and she wouldn't have to change.

And I had no one to blame but myself. If I hadn't left her, she would have never turned to Jacob, and Jacob's feelings would be nothing but a crush. I had forgiven her, myself was another mattered. Maybe Jasper was right, I never let it go, held onto it.

She had cried that night, she finally said goodbye to him. I have never seen her cry like that – and holding her had been one of the most painful experiences I had endured. I had promised myself I would never cause her that much pain ever again.

That night, I decided the chose was her, not mine. It was never mine. I had tried to control her life because I thought I knew what was best. But in the end, I didn't.

About a week afterward Charlie had been called down to Houston and she had to live at my place for two weeks. We finally we allowed the time alone that we needed. It had been real blessing. Away from the pressures of the wedding, of family and the world we had talk through and sorted out a lot.

We became more sexually active those two weeks. Understanding that it was natural to have these craving in us, it was our way of expressing love. I pushed the rules more than I have ever done. She experienced pleasure from my touch for the very first time. We came back with a better understanding of what we wanted and needed.

It wasn't about the act itself, but what we express during the act. We become closer. The final act, we agreed on, was going to happen on our wedding night.

And the final piece had happened, and today we had spent a good part of the day making love.


	14. Chapter 13 Unexpected

Raising Sun

Chapter 13 – Unexpected

_By our place in the midst of the furthest seas we were fated to stand alone _

_- Henry Lawson_

I had returned before dawn and tied up the boat as quickly as possible. It seemed that everything was in perfect order. I could give her a real honeymoon without hurting her, we were going to do the college thing, and maybe with a little luck we will at least do a year before she decides to turn. Whatever she wanted.

We were together, nothing was going to tear us apart.

I entered the house through our bedroom doors, only to find she wasn't there. I took a sniff, following the smell of rioting chicken and her out into the great room. Almost all the windows were opened and she had the fans going at full. The whirling sound of the fan bounced off the walls. At any moment the fan was going to fly away. I should have thought of putting an air condition united in the house, for those nights I have to have gone hunting. I hadn't thought that without my body, she would be too hot.

I found her in the great room. She was spread out on the couch, sleep, with the TV. turned on. She had been sweating, trying to cool herself down.

I wrapped my hands around her, grateful for once that my body was cold and I could cool her down.

"I'm sorry," I whispered as I wiped the sweat from her clammy forehead. She was running a little bit of fever, and I hoped it had to do with the warmth and not that she was sick. "So much for thoroughness. I didn't think about how hot you would be with me gone. I'll have an air conditioner installed before I leave again." I leaned down to kiss her lips and she bolted out of my arms.

"Excuse me,"

This wasn't like her, was she sick. "Bella?"

She made it to the bathroom before I heard the undeniable sound of vomiting coming from it. I didn't waste time, getting to the bathroom as quickly as possible.

"Bella? What Wrong?" I said holding her upright, trying to keep her hair out of her face. Bella doesn't get sick very easily. For the most part, other than the smell of blood, she had an extremely strong stomach. She swears it had to do with all the yogurt she eats.

"Damn rancid chicken," she moaned.

"Are you all right," I asked. Hating the chicken who did this to her.

"Fine," she panted. Her face was a weird shade of green and white and her skin felt clammy and cool, even dead like. She hadn't looked this bad since the day when they were doing blood typing in Biology. I took a quick sniff of the air, but there was no blood. Her lips had turned to white and her eyes weren't dilating property. This could be food poison or it could be a number of types of different tropical diseases.

"It's just food poisoning. You don't need to see this. Go away," She said, stubborn as ever. Bella had never been used to someone taking care of her, so she had a hard time accepting help.

"Not likely Bella," I said. One way or another she is going to learn that she is my wife and a Cullen and we take care of each other.

I helped her up to the sink so that she could wash her mouth.

"Food poisoning?"

"Yeah, I made some chicken last night. It tasted off, so I threw it out. But I ate a few bites first," she said. She hadn't eaten much meat on the island. Salmonella, maybe but she wasn't showing the signs of it.

I put a hand on her forehead. "How do you feel now?"

"Pretty normal. A little hungry now?" she said. I was going to be given Carlisle a call after she falls asleep again. This wasn't sounding right.

I made her wait an hour and keep down a glass of water before I allowed her eat. I figured eggs were safe and she was craving them. Afterwards we stretched out on the couch and watched CNN. Nothing new was happening in the outside world, India bombed Pakistan, Bush was in idiot and people were trying to explain the rise of gas prices. World War III could have happened and we wouldn't know it.

She closed her eyes, snuggling close to me before getting bored with what was showing. Bella wasn't interesting in the political world as I was. My father was a lawyer during a very exciting time in American History. Teddy Roosevelt was the president, Spanish American War was happening, Women Suffrage was on the rise, so most of family dinner discussions had revolved around politics. My mother had a keen mind and had been a Suffrage herself.

I felt a movement and she bolted from my lap, not making the bathroom. I followed her, holding her hair as she let go the eggs she just eaten.

"Maybe we should go back to Rio, see a doctor," I suggested. I don't think this was food poisoning.

She shook her head, stubborn as ever. "I'll be fine right after I brush my teeth."

She walked away and I took a sniff of the air, she smelled off. Not bad, just like something was changing in her chemical make up. I dialed Carlisle number but got pushed through to the answering machine. Being around blood as much as he was, he had to make sure he was complete full, so he spent more time hunting than we did. Most of us turned off our phones; I just recently had been leaving mine on.

I decided to check on Bella, to see if I could persuade her to go to a doctor. Even with my degrees, I never really practice. Carlisle working knowledge was more than my mechanical knowledge of the human body. I would feel better if someone else said it was food poisoning.

I knocked on the closed door to our bedroom.

"Are you well," I asked.

"Yes and no," her voice sounding bewildered. What type of answer was yes and no.

"Bella can I please come in," I said.

"O..kay,"

I opened the door to find Bella sit on the floor next to her suitcase, she had been holding something. I sat down next to her, my hand going to her forehead at once, she was paler than normal.

"What's wrong?"

"How many days has it been since the wedding," she whispered.

"Seventeen," what an odd question. "Bella, what is it."

She looked down at her hands, her lips moving but no words were coming out it. I strain to hear it. But all I could hear was the movement. She seemed to be counting something. Than stopped and restarted again, like she was checking her numbers.

"Bella!" going half out of my mind here, I needed to know. I hate not being able to read her mind, because her silence was driving mine insane. "I'm losing my mine over here."

She looked stun and than held up what she was holding when I walked into the room. It was a small blue box with the word tampons written across it. I quickly searched my mind for what humans used their box for.

I know it was something to do with females, I don't think males use…..

Menstrual cycles, they were used as a way to absorbed the blood flow during menstrual cycles, the monthly bleed to prepare a women's body for child birth.

"What" Are you trying to pass this illness off as PMS?"

"No," she whispered still bewilder. "No, Edward. I'm trying to tell you that my period is five days late."

Menstrual cycle, the monthly bleed to prepare a women's body for child birth. Child birth.

Human female produce a smell right before they start their period. Most human males are unaware of it, but it is when the time of the month they were fertile. It's a strong smell, very pungent.

I went through my mind, back to our wedding night. I knew when that smell occurred. I usually schedule my hunting trips during those times – mostly because of the smell and the fact that she would be bleeding. I had been so intone to her body, I knew exactly when that smell occurred and how long it was going to last.

And the smell had occurred on our wedding night. She had been primed and fertile during our first time. Did I just impregnate my wife?

How in hell could I?

I was dead, wasn't I?

A walking body, a living corpse, the un-dead.

I went through all my medical training and what I knew on vampire anatomy. We couldn't have children could we? If we could Rose and Esme would have had them by now. They couldn't have them because they couldn't change. Their bodies were stuck in what ever moment they became a vampire, unable to do the monthly requirements to carry and give birth.

A female need to change. It had to change, to except the fetus and sperm.

But I was different. My body didn't need to change to be able to sire offspring.

I had at one point of my existent had the capabilities to produce sperm, the other part of the ingredient to make a child. And sperm can live in a human body after it dies, could some how my sperm had survive?

I was frozen at seventeen, but unlike my sisters and mother, my body only had to go through one change – puberty. My sacks had already drop, my voice finish cracking and I started growing hair in places I didn't know possible way before Carlisle met me.

How could I have been stupid? How could I not see this, that I might be able to impregnate Bella? I thought I had thought of everything, except packing condoms.

Maybe I was wrong, but the signs were there. The sickness, the tiredness, her weight gain, her breast becoming more sensitive. I just refused to seem them and it was happening so fast, faster than normal.

My mind was still trying to wrap it self around the concept when I heard.

"Pregnant."

When did my phone go off and who was she talking to? I heard Carlisle ask her a couple of questions. And her trying to explain things. I couldn't get the words to make sense but I finally snapped out of it. I held up my hand for the phone.

"Um, I think Edward wants to talk to you," she said.

"Put him on," Carlisle said. I didn't like the tone of his voice. He sounded worried, more worried than normal.

"Is it possible," I whispered.

Carlisle was quiet for a moment. "Theoratically possible, I mean nobody knows how long the male reproductive cells can last in body or maybe we can still produce them. We are derived from human and we do share some of the same characteristics and chromosomes, enough to maybe allow conception to happen."

I closed my eyes for a moment, should I be happy about this.

"And Bella," I said wrapping my arms if I could protect her from all of this. I moved my lips fast so that Bella couldn't hear. "Is she going to be okay?" I wanted to ask if she was going to survive this, but couldn't form the words.

"I don't know Edward. This is nothing I have been trained for or heard about for that matter. She needs to come home right away. I have to be able to examine her. Make sure she eats plenty and drinks a lot of fluids. Edward we will get through this don't worry. I'll have everything prepared, if we have to we will get it out of her."

"Yes, Yes I will," I said snapping the phone shut and trying to keep calm. What the hell did I do to my wife?

"What did Carlisle say," she asked.

"He thinks you're pregnant."

"Who are you calling now," she asked.

"The airport. We're going home."

I hate trying to fly internationally. I had spent two hours on a phone, trying to get my pregnant wife out of this country, but it seemed nobody wanted to help. I was almost at the point of throwing her on my back and running all the way there, if I didn't think that would add more stress to the situation.

To keep my mind from killing somebody, I packed. Bella had left the room, saying something about being hungry. Eating is good, normal pregnant women eat a lot.

But as furious as I with the Brazilian Department of Tourism it was nothing to the way I was feeling right now towards myself.

How could I be so careless, so stupid? I knew how the body worked. I should have taken the precarious to make sure I was safe. Now I am going to lose Bella to the demon spawn that I implanted into her.

_It might not be a demon spawn_ a small voice whispered inside me. I tried to kill that too, for even suggesting something like that. Of course it was, I heard the stories of the baby vampires, from both Carlisle and Jasper. I knew what they were capable of. Whole villages have been wiped out because of them.

Humans blamed rats on the Black Plaque but it really had been vampire children out of control.

If I didn't have Bella to worry about right now, I would have killed myself. _Calm down Edward, you need to get a grip. She needs you right now._

And I went to find her.

"Bella?" I peeked inside the kitchen, where she was sitting eating a bag of pretzels and crying. I hated myself even worse. Did that thing hurt her; I was going to rip it to piece once I get it out of her. I wouldn't let it hurt her.

"Bella. Are you in pain?" I looked at her face, her eyes, she seemed scared.

"No, no –" My brave poor Bella.

I hugged her against my chest. "Don't be afraid. We'll be home in sixteen hours. You'll be fine. Carlisle will ready when we get there. We'll take care of this, and you'll be fine, you'll be fine."

"Take care of this? What do you mean?"

I looked at her eyes. "We're going to get that thing out of you before it can hurt any part of you. Don't be scared. I won't let it hurt you."

"That thing," she gasped, looking more scared than I have seen her.

I wanted to rest assure her, but I completely forgot about the cleaning crew was due here. I needed to get rid of them, last thing I needed was to see them.

"Dammit! I forgot Gustavo was due today. I'll get rid of him and be right back." I said darting off. Last thing I needed was Kaure and her accusing eyes. She would have known at once what I did.

I explained that we were leaving because Bella was sick and that if they could come back tomorrow. Gustavo understood seeing the stress in my voice, but Kaure eyes were narrowed.

"I have food for her," she said.

"Thank you, I will take it to her."

"No, you don't. I will."

"Sorry, sir she can be most stubborn, its best to let her deliver the food," Gustavo said. I had a feeling he was the type of person who didn't rein his wife in.

"That's okay." Bella didn't look pregnant or dead and it was best that thought we were leaving because she was sick.

"You did something to her," she accused me in her native tongue.

How did she know? I tried to convince her, without any luck. Were all human's female this stubborn.

"No, I see her myself," she said, switching back to Portuguese.

I decided I didn't have time to argue with her. She was determined to see Bella's live one way or another.

I lead her into kitchen, hoping it would be a short visit. Gustavo didn't follow deciding to take a walk around the place to make a list of things he needed to do. I went straight to Bella. She had been crying again, I wiped the tears and murmured in her ears.

"She insisting on leaving the food she brought – she made us dinner," it would have been funny if it was for the situation. "It's an excuse – she wants to make sure I haven't killed you yet."

I turned back to her expecting that she would want to leave, but her eyes weren't on Bella, Bella stomach. She murmured something in her native tongue, something on she was sure and walked away.

_Maybe I was wrong, maybe. The girl looks sick, the other looked perfectly healthy except for the bruise._

"She okay, damn it," I snapped at her in her native tongue. I had picked up the tongue, during my first visit.

Kaure turned to go, her skirt fanning causing the smell of the food to spread out. Bella breathe in, grab her mouth and took off to the sink. My eyes widen as I tried to smooth her. She kept get sicker and sicker, before I realized what it was. Onions and fish, the smell was causing her to get sick. I quickly slammed the food into the refrigerator.

Kaure stood there for a second before. _She breeding a Lysbonison! You impregnate her with hell's child._


	15. Chapter 14 Story, Myths and Legions

Raising Sun

Chapter 14 – Story, myths and legions

_And like a dying lady, lean and pale, _

_Who totters forth, wrapp'd in a gauzy veil,_

_Out of her chamber, led by the insane_

_And feeble wanderings of her fading brain,_

_- Percy Shelly_

I was beside myself, but my first reaction was to push Bella behind me, to protect her. She didn't bring the food to help her; it was a test. I saw the whole thing flashing through Kaure mind. The smell was supposed to get a pregnant woman sick, to route outs that were caring a _Lysonbidon_. Silly superstition, but by the violent reaction that Bella had, it must have some truth.

"Hell demon, Blood of Satin, come to steal the soul of a child. You will kill her, her blood will be your sin," she shouted. "Impregnate her with a spawn of diseases, it will bring death upon us. Hell demon." Her hands were waving as more came out; she stayed in her native tongue. I knew Gustavo didn't speak it; she didn't want to involve her husband in this. "Cursed you are, taking a young innocent girl blood."

I took a step towards her, trying to calm her down. "I am sorry," I whispered, "I never meant this to happen. But you know of this…please for my wife sake, please I need information."

She starred at me for a while. "You speak my tongue."

"I learned it when I was here last."

"When were you here last?"

Knowledge of our world was strictly forbidden, but every once in a while you run into a culture that legions has been corrupted by time.

"1938."

She crossed herself. I knew in the Catholic Religion that conversing with a demon was a sure way to the fires of hell. Not that I was practicing any more.

She looked at Bella for a moment. "Does she know?"

"Yes, she had known for over two years," adding that little piece of information. I was desperate, it usually forbidden to talk about what we really are around humans, but I never thought it was possible for me to father a child either.

I rested my hand against Bella check. "This is my wife Bella; she knows who I am and what I am. We don't have secrets. I loved her and she loves me. Please Kaure, I didn't mean this to happen. I would never hurt her. Please, I am going out of my mind. What did I do to her?" I pleaded with her.

She stared at me with doubt for a moment. She looked back from me to Bella. Than took a step forward, accepting what I was telling her.

"She has been having dreams, seemed to crave only eggs and tired all the time."

I nodded.

"She is carrying the child. She is no longer human. She will change into one of you. Did she have bruises, but not feel a thing."

"Does your culture talk of this?"

"Yes, this happened in my great grandmother times, but women still whispered about it. Women would disappear and than reappeared. Their bodies covered in bruises and they did not remember why. They carried these demon children, protective of them, even loving them if that was possible."

"How long," I asked.

"Sometimes a month, sometimes sorter," she said making a motion of a balloon expanding from her waste, fast.

"Than what."

"They child can't be brought into the world the normal way, so it rips itself out of the womb."

"Rips, itself out," I tried to swallow, but couldn't.

"What happened to these women," I was afraid to ask.

She walked towards Bella, putting her hand over Bella's, Bella's was resting on her belly, as if she could protect the thing from the stories.

"_Morte,"_ she whispered and left the room. _She will die, demon. There is nothing that can be done about it. Better kill the women before it is brought into this world._

Death. I had sentence Bella to death.

Bella walked away.

"Where are you going," I whispered.

"To brush my teeth again," she said.

At a time like this, she wanted to brush her teeth.

"Don't worry about what she said. It's nothing but a legend, old lies for the sake of entertainment."

She smiled at me. "I didn't understand anything," she said sadly.

"I packed your toothbrush. I'll get it for you," I walked out not sure I could look at her. For the first time I felt real fear. For the first time, I couldn't protect her.

The realization hit me so hard it caused me to stumble. In all my time, the one thing I could be sure of, I could protect her. From myself and from others of my kind. But this, there was nothing I could do.

"Are we leaving," she asked.

"As soon as you're done."

I repacked her toothbrush, pacing around the room.

'I'll get the bags into the boat."

"Edward."

"Yes," I said.

"Could you…pack some of the food" you know in case I get hungry again."

"Of course. Don't worry about anything. We'll get to Carlisle in just a few hours, really. This will all be over soon."

She nodded, as if in agreement. And I promised myself if she wanted to leave me after this, I wouldn't stop her.

************************Author's Notes********************************

Sorry about this being such a short chapter, but I felt it should stand alone. And many thanks to those who keep reviewing and adding me to their favorites. Lots of love.


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